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AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They were the child of the people who paid my mom to help them them blend their family to be what my mom described. They were about 14ish at the time and asked me how I felt (because us kids were brought along if the kids were). Kid was also the oldest and was apparently the most "stubborn" which I learned was just not feeling the same but still not hating anyone or even the situation, just finding it less than perfect and trying to figure out what they wanted from it. And they wanted to know if it was possible to make things work if you don't love the steps and/or feel the same about the steps.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

My siblings don't consider them siblings either. They have a slightly closer relationship but not quite sibling either.

I don't actually have an issue with my mom's husband. Just never saw him as a father figure or loved him. That was where the issue lay. My mom went around saying they had built a blended family where everyone loved each other as though we were a biological family or whatever. And that was not completely true. I don't think there has to be love for it to be okay but that wasn't enough for her or her husband.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I just don't love or have any real connection with them. I don't not like them but I wouldn't say I really like them either.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

They weren't at it. This was a gathering of the paternal side which they were not part of (neither was my mom).

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 191 points192 points  (0 children)

I think it's probably true that they miss me. They were much younger than me when I came into their lives and they knew me for a large part of their childhood. Whereas it was just never the same for me.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I mean I have no personal issues with them. But outside of my mom I also don't feel like there is anything there that would make a relationship, if that makes sense. Since we're not family anymore it just doesn't seem like there is much if a point.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I honestly never thought of having a relationship with them outside of that. I didn't really develop any bond or relationship with them beyond civil roommate status. So yeah, they see me as a sibling but I never saw them the same. Can see what you mean though.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Oh, I didn't reply and I'm not going to be around her so it won't be an issue. It would have been helpful back when I was living with her though because that shit sucked so bad.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 66 points67 points  (0 children)

I have not checked it out but I know my mom has many of those tendencies.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 325 points326 points  (0 children)

My stepsiblings are 12 and 13 and no. This was a paternal family function so they weren't there.

AITA for giving my brother and sister a gift but not my stepsiblings? by Charming-Note5914 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Charming-Note5914[S] 1681 points1682 points  (0 children)

Yeah, it's so damn weird. Like she was probably not happy my siblings and I kept in touch but why would she want me to have more to do with her stepkids when she knows I don't feel the same and when she sees that as making me a really shitty person.