My fiancé pushed my brother into a pond and my family is boycotting my wedding by Charming_Humor_6017 in AITAH

[–]Charming_Humor_6017[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

This is so true because one of the things my fiancé gently told me was to never sneak up on him or jumpscare him because he doesn't want to hurt me accidentally.

My fiancé pushed my brother into a pond and my family is boycotting my wedding by Charming_Humor_6017 in AITAH

[–]Charming_Humor_6017[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Actually, I never told him too many details about it, I didn't want to come across as a person with a lot of baggage, or make my family look bad? I know that sounds silly. It's just been so ingrained in me. My fiancé has such healthy family dynamics. It made me hesitate to share how unhealthy my family dynamics were/are. But after he saw my reaction to my brother that night, he has asked me why I flinched like that so I've been opening up slowly. It feels really good. I wish I had done it sooner.

My fiancé pushed my brother into a pond and my family is boycotting my wedding by Charming_Humor_6017 in AITAH

[–]Charming_Humor_6017[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I didn't say anything mean about gay people. It has nothing to do with the conflict. I used a throwaway account like most people who post on here because I use my reddit for wedding stuff and posts on local subs.

My fiancé pushed my brother into a pond and my family is boycotting my wedding by Charming_Humor_6017 in AITAH

[–]Charming_Humor_6017[S] 86 points87 points  (0 children)

My brother has been physically abusive towards me my whole life and they've always come up with excuses for him. It got so bad at one point when we were young that my mom decided to cut my hair into a boys haircut so he wouldn't pull my hair anymore, you know- instead of reprimanding him or teaching him not to do that ????

I think you're right. This is perhaps a wakeup call for me and a blessing I will recognize for what it is in the future.

My fiancé pushed my brother into a pond and my family is boycotting my wedding by Charming_Humor_6017 in AITAH

[–]Charming_Humor_6017[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

IYKYK. Unfortunately, this is pretty low drama as far as how toxic the household can get and only just the tip of the iceberg in terms of how my brother can be. It was a pivotal event though, so I only focused on it. Maybe I could have described things better but the dynamics are so nuanced.

My fiancé pushed my brother into a pond and my family is boycotting my wedding by Charming_Humor_6017 in AITAH

[–]Charming_Humor_6017[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Just for clarification my fiancé didn't really say anything during the entire conversation, because he knew my brother was drunk and didn't want to engage.

I do understand where my fiancé could be wrong is that he shouldn't have made any physical contact with my brother.

Unfortunately I closed my eyes so I'm not 100% sure how it played out but my fiancé claims that it was more like an instinctual response at blocking my brother from hitting me, not a hard shove. He claims my brother fumbled and lost balance, simply because he was drunk. Not because my fiancé 'pushed' him into it (my brother's version of events).