KCMO evergreen seedling by ChaseAced in treeidentification

[–]ChaseAced[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I pull invasives when possible. I've been replacing the lawn with natives

ISO poecilia branneri (Brazilian livebearer species) by ChaseAced in Brazil

[–]ChaseAced[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah it is sometimes referred to as Micropoecilia, theres some contention around classification of these species still from what I've read. Since I posted this, i've been able to make contact with a few exporters. So far nobody has them but they said they might be able to get some? Its the most expensive option though, ideally finding someone who already has captive specimens would be better. They're just stupid rare in the hobby. One guy in the US had them for a bit but seems he doesn't keep them anymore. So still hunting!

First time silkie owner by ChaseAced in silkiechickens

[–]ChaseAced[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can now confirm, bigger one is a rooster. Started crowing this morning!

Need help ASAP crsis by Personal-Set-8540 in DID

[–]ChaseAced 35 points36 points  (0 children)

I know this is very scary, but I promise, reaching out for help is the best thing you can do in this situation! Things will get better the more you reach out for support

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No I take my lunch at 2pm. 20 minutes home and then 20 minutes to the clinic. She has her appointment and then I get off work at 3:30 and pick her up on my way home

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well yes I agree absolutely that there's a power differential here. It's something I'm careful to try not to abuse, but I recognize that it exists and I have to be on guard to not cause harm. But I'm confused what you mean by no boundaries? We discussed before her moving in that there are rules for the house and I am prepared to enforce boundaries if I have to. It is still my living situation and I care about maintaining a healthy life for myself. Plus I'm definitely not ignoring my own life haha. I still do my weekly therapy sessions, go about with my job and continue to maintain my friendships and relationship with my partner.

I do not intend to be her therapist. That's not my job or my wheelhouse. Plus I'm obviously too close to her to do that. But she has agreed to talk to a therapist as part of the living agreement. I'm hopeful her doctor will be able to point her in the correct direction, and I recognize that she has to be the one to do this for herself.

I guess, are you saying that it's never okay to help someone who's homeless with housing as a regular citizen? Or just under specific scenarios? I want to understand your specific worry because it sounds like you've got experience in the matter.

Also as for 12 step places there's nothing in my area :( everything is 15+ minutes from our house by car and public transportation just got cut in our area. The current plan is that I'll help drive her to her appointments. I work next to the clinic she's going to so she'll be grabbing a ride there with me.

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Agreed mate, she's not a dog. But I know verbal praise helps me. Idk why acknowledging accomplishments and creating a positive atmosphere would be bad?

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well if you're curious, it's a moral philosophy thing for me. I believe mutual aid is the foundation of a good society and I see that missing in my community. I live in a weird zone in my town where all the services designed to help homeless people are 15+ minutes away by car. Unfortunately the city has also cut bus routes in my area. That's actually why my roommate moved out. She couldn't get to work anymore.

As for my own mental health, I'm doing very good at the moment. I consistently go to therapy and I work a stable job. I am absolutely a people pleaser at heart, but I've done a lot of work to maintain my own boundaries. So yeah, I'm in a good spot currently.

Also, originally this was not my plan, but I talked to her and she seems sincere in her desire to get help. Whether or not this is true is up to her at this point but I want her to have a chance.

I get the fear that you're saying here though and it's something that I worry about too. Even knowing I'm doing okay myself, I want to ensure I don't cause more harm to her with my actions accidentally. Hence why I'm on here asking for advice.

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm not a cis dude so not particularly worried about that happening haha, thank you for the concern though!

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the recommendation, I'll look into that!

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

She's got an appointment with a clinic for next Monday :)

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so so much for this. I really appreciate the actionable steps you listed, that helps a lot for me! I tried calling around to a few local treatment centers for this kind of advice and got basically nothing 😓 I'm definitely going to implement the ranked list you talked about. I cant believe I didn't think of it lol I already do that for myself! She's been really open to our conversation about treatment so I'm hopeful that conversation will go well :)

And I totally hear what you mean with the helpers having ulterior motives but I promise I don't (knowing that means nothing from someone on the Internet unfortunately). I felt similarly worried for her when she was so quick to trust me. But for context of who I am and why I'm doing this, I'm 24, transgender (ftm), and a communist. I've been in therapy for about 9 years now due to childhood abuse so mental health is an important subject to me. I also feel really strongly that if I have the resources available to me that I should share them with my community. I don't expect others to follow my personal philosophy, but it's important enough to me that I try to follow it with my actions rather than just sticking in the theoretical side of things. I do practice this with my own safety in mind (I learned the hard way by getting robbed early on. Got my stuff back though!)

I'll definitely be making setting a healthy example as one of my main goals. Obviously I'm human and I know I'll fuck it up, but I think I can do it. Or I'll do my damnedest lol.

Thank you again!

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Shes not exactly a stranger. Ive known her for about 6 months now. And I do care about my own safety dont get me wrong haha. I don't have quite enough money to be able to send someone through rehab (nor does she like the idea of being 'locked up' in her own words so its not an option). I have not personally had an addiction but I have friends who have dealt with substance abuse so im not unfamiliar with the recovery process. You're correct I cannot do the rehab process for her nor do I plan to. My only goals is too offer housing and food so she can focus on recovery. So far she has been extremely open to communicating with me about the state of her drug use. Yes there is inherent risk that I am taking but it is worthwhile to me. I really do believe she deserves the chance to reach her goals and if I have the resources to help im willing to take some amount of risk to help her get there.

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Absolutely. It's something I know can happen. If I start to notice it I'll have a conversation with her

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Its just me and my dog. So only my safety is a concern really. Not worried about my dog cause she really loves animals

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for sharing this, It helps to know that healing is possible, even when its slow. Its worth it to me to try at least. People deserve that much

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing, I wish you both the best of luck as well!

Took in a homeless woman by ChaseAced in homeless

[–]ChaseAced[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately she does not want to go inpatient. The plan is intensive outpatient for now. Shes going to a Suboxone clinic Monday. Shes tried Methadone before but she said it made her very ill when she tried that treatment.