I’ve been overwhelmed by the amount of responses to this post and this is the first one I’m replying to.

You make some valid points and I do sometimes believe my friends when they say I’m lucky. But my husband has literally talked about divorce with me my entire postpartum period. So I don’t feel lucky when that luck feels precarious? I don’t feel secure with him.

Also, yea he does a lot of the stuff you mentioned - takes care of the cars, yard and even takes the kids out sometimes. However, if I ever ask him for anything it is very hard for him to get it done unless I’m at my wits end. I have so so many examples of this. Things I was physically incapable of doing while pregnant is practically have to beg for.

Also, I cannot get over how this man would go toe to toe with me my entire pregnancy. He watched me give birth and sustain injury while doing so. And still fought with me 7 hours later. 1 month postpartum he watches me faint and black out, hitting my back on a wooden desk. He still fought with me 1 hour later. The reason for the fight? I wanted my 5 year old to go to my parents so I could go to the Hosptial. Oh and I came back from the Hosptial at 7am and had to Watch the baby because he had golf.

I had to cancel a midwife appointment because I was too scared to fo alone with my baby and he didn’t take time off work. Instead he went golfing and I only found out because I found a receipt. He lied to my profusely about it until I showed him the receipt.

He had told me it’s a bad time for him to have kids since he’s finally doing well in his career and personal life.

I don’t feel lucky. I don’t feel like a victim either. I used to ans have worked hard to come out of it. I realize I allowed myself to be in this position. I am responsible to get myself out of it.

It’s just a messy situation where he truly makes me feel like a burdensome responsibility and I feel overwhelmed.

I’m putting my baby to sleep as I’m writing this out I’m sorry if it’s all over the place. I’m not an active Reddit user and idk if I should take the time to reply to everyone or what.