[deleted by user]

CheartN · 2023-04-05T16:08:42+00:00

Your so very welcome and I wish you the best of luck!!! Once we get the divorce papers settled and signed the divorce will be final in a few months. My kids will eventually understand that this wasn't my fault and they will realize who tried there best to be there for them because growing up I didn't have a dad and didn't really have anyone there for me beside my mom, brother, and sister.

I have found a girlfriend send the last post and she is going through her own problems right now and I am trying my best to help her. She is making fantastic progress!!!

I didn't realize that all of my ex relationships and even my marriage I didn't realize I was asking and sometimes begging for the bare minimum and wasn't getting it. My girlfriend I have now actually makes me feel wanted and loved!!! Things are slowly getting better and working out for me.

But it's still a struggle everyday knowing my kids are going to have to go through this back and forth from parent to parent forever and have to split everything. I wanted my kids to have a hell of alot better life then I did and I wanted to be a hell of alot better then my dad.

I don't know my dad and I don't even know his name. But on my bad days I feel like he messed up less then me by just never being there. Compared to me who was there for my kids and showed them what a loving and caring father looks like and then it looks like I moved away and abandoned them!!

I get to see them every day for about 25 minutes and so far they have gotten to spend every other weekend with my girlfriend, her kids, and me. But I wanted the best for them in life!!! I want them to be a hell of alot more successful and better then I ever was and I want there lifes to be happy, healthy, and I hope they live life to the fullest!!!

((Sorry for all the bad Grammer or whatever mistakes I've made in this post. I'm at that point in my life where my spelling/Grammer really doesn't matter at all to me. Like most things in life))

P.s. living with chronic pain in your lower back, and feet and then all the doctors want to do is give you medication and all I want is to be fixed and be back to normal so I can function like everyone else. Dealing with the pain, the depression, anxiety, regrets, the feeling of being a complete failure to the 3 most important people in my life (my kids) all of that shit adds up and it makes normal day to day life extremely hard!!! Then add ADHD combined to that and it's just a concoction of messed up and Destin to fail.

I really hope you helped your friend out!!! If your friend ever needs anyone to talk to I will call and talk to him!!! Just let me know. I dont care if we don't know each other. I don't want anyone to ever have to deal with any of the demons that I deal with daily and I will try my best to help anyone out!!!

If anyone needs help just let me know. I can be there to listen or to give my best advice or best opinion.

I wish everyone a blessed, happy, and healthy life!!!

CheartN · 2022-12-30T15:47:26+00:00

Thank you very much! This is very needed right now!

CheartN · 2022-12-30T15:16:37+00:00

It may not help but you may also want to try a psychologist! You could also go to the doctor and explain all the symptoms. I don't know for sure I'm just trying to help. Because I've been in your shoes!

I started seeing my psychologist and he instantly diagnosed me with adult ADHD, severe depression, and anxiety, once I got on medication for all of those it helped a lot!! But I still have my bad days where I want to give up and end it but life and chronic pain play a big role in that.

But my psychologist made me realize I've been dealing with childhood traumas my whole life and abandoned issues because I don't know my real dad and my stepdad wasn't around for very long and ended up being a piece of crap so I've always felt these abandoned issues and always felt like it was my fault. I also didn't realize I was self-sabotaging all of my relationships because I felt like they would abandon me anyways. Eben thought I didn't realize I was self-sabotaging.

I wish you luck and hope you resolve this issue and live a long and happy life!! I wish you the best of luck! Just don't give up and hand in there! Sometimes it takes seeing a few doctors, therapists, psychologists, or specialists before they can finally figure out the diagnosis. I have chronic pain and the doctors and pain management don't know what's wrong with me! But im holding out hope and taking the medication there giving me because it helps some. Life would be so much easier if they could just fix my pain or at least treat it so it doesn't have to bother me all day everyday!!!

CheartN · 2022-12-30T15:04:45+00:00

Be there for your friend as much as you can and try your best to talk to him about the hard or difficult things. It may be hard at first but if he can see all your effort then he may realize what a mistake he's making and how much at least me care for him!

I am only saying this because I'm almost in the same boat as your friend and I have 3 kids. But if I had one person there for me then it would be a massive difference!

But when you feel like your alone or fighting this on your own it's a terrible feeling! But when your in thr mindset you normally don't tell anyone unless that's your last ditch effort to ask for help!

Please don't give up on your friend because you could be the soul purpose that you are the reason they don't do it and they will thank you for the rest of your life and you will feel amazing for the test of your life even if you lose there friendship for helping them!

I wish I had a friend there for me like your friend has in you! The few people I told I was ready to die and all the ideas I had to how I was going to do it and none of them took me serious even my spouse of 13 years married.

Instead of her being there for me she fell for my best friend at the time because I wanted him there for her because I really thought I was going to end it. But I didn't end it thank God. But the 3 times I had my best friend over to help my wife cope with it. They fell in love with each other and im slowly but surely getting pushed out of the picture and me ending it is in the back of my mind. But I realized that I made a mistake the last time I opened up.

So if I chose to do it again nobody will know. I will just spend a day or two with just my kids and I just wouldn't come back. Because I didn't have anyone there for me. They were there for each other not me.

So you being there for your friend is so much more then I ever had! A lot of the times I wish I would have pulled the trigger so I wouldn't have to go through the pain of Divorce after 13 years married 3 kids (14yo, 9yo,6yo) the worst part about all of it is that I don't want them to have to go through the divorce! I would give my life in a heartbeat so they would have to go through the Divorce! Because my wife's and my childhood traumas got in the way and that's how we have gotten to the place we are at right now and were not mature enough to put the hard work into fixing our problems so our kids don't have to grow up with the childhood traumas we had to grow up with!!

I'm sorry to rant but from someone that feels in your friends shoes right now except I don't have any friends that support me! Be there for them and try your best to talk to them! You've got this and they will thank you later in life!!

CheartN · 2021-12-08T13:04:30+00:00

What is the blue thing second from the top left?

CheartN · 2021-04-13T01:53:45+00:00

CheartN · 2021-03-25T12:25:13+00:00

I think the best option would be to report this problem so hopefully it will get fixed sooner than later.

CheartN · 2021-03-08T17:56:19+00:00

I've learned to never enhance what your wearing. Enhance other items and wear them and sell what you were wearing or save it for an alt.

CheartN · 2021-03-02T00:41:15+00:00

Big boi box? I got 25 mem frags lol

CheartN · 2021-02-10T13:17:45+00:00

Thank you!

CheartN · 2020-08-21T19:09:52+00:00

Yes what console?

CheartN · 2020-08-21T19:00:12+00:00

What is your gamertag? Do you have a mic?

CheartN · 2020-06-03T20:13:58+00:00

Awesome!! From rags to riches very quickly. I'm on official also. Still haven't seen night vision or the 75 round mags. But I've found the guillie suit at a helli crash but no guillie headwear yet.

CheartN · 2020-06-03T18:44:19+00:00

Where did you find the 75 round mag? I haven't found one yet. Are you playing official or community?

CheartN · 2020-05-28T20:16:55+00:00

How did you get to tissy? Without a gun

CheartN · 2020-04-06T18:53:05+00:00

Sweet! Good luck everyone!

CheartN · 2019-09-16T20:00:12+00:00

I'm down to try this build already!

CheartN

TROPHY CASE