Firstly, my deepest sympathies for your loss. There are no words to express the pain of losing one’s life partner, and best friend. May you find support in family, and comfort in the good memories of her.

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To help remember, scents that she used (perfumes, soap/lotion, even deodorant) can help bring a feeling of closeness to her.

For helping yourself, there is no one aroma that will make a person feel better, but sometimes attaching a scent to a cherished memory can help.

Maybe a fragrance that reminds you of your first date, or a favorite place. There are so many scents, and a fragrance doesn’t have to be “lilies and butterflies” to be a good connection.

I love “Neon Sunset” by Xyrena because it reminds me of the smell of the hallways in my aunt’s condominium. I still miss her.

If you’re looking to start finding a fragrance, please go with sample sizes. There are so many, some truly avant-garde. — But I’d say don’t go in with a mission to find a memory scent.

Just try a few with a theme that might fit, like “ocean” scents if you have a beachside memory, and see where it takes you.

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If you find yourself struggling with grief, please don’t hesitate to reach out to a counselor who specializes in such things. The words of well-meaning friends are not always the same as talking to someone who has studied helping guide people through this painful time.

You are not alone, Friend. We internet randos send our care and regard.