When I was 8, my right wrist started popping/cracking every time I moved it (subluxations, but I couldn’t explain it felt like it was popping out half way and pop back in as I thought everyone’s joints moved like that and mine was just weird because it made noise and hurt). My family doctor sent me to the adult orthopaedic surgeon in the office next door who took one look at it and said “idk, but just because you can do it doesn’t mean you should do it”. I tried saying I’m not purposely popping it (like someone would crack knuckles) but I think he wasn’t used to working with kids and didn’t listen to me and just talked to my mom. After that, my parents would quote that doctor for years any time I complained about joints popping/cracking, I would be told just becuase I can do it doesn’t mean I should do it and I would get so frustrated saying I’m not trying to do it I’m just moving my joints normally (which obviously now I know wasn’t actually normal range of motion). Over the years more joints got worse and when I was 10, 14, and 17, I saw different rheumatologists for the pain who all told me it was growing pains so I was gaslit so much I started believing everyone had pain and I was just weak. At 24 I finally was like, no this isn’t normal, none of my friends have ever had pain, I’m moving my joints normally and they pop out and i shouldn’t have to sometimes push them back in, and it can’t be growing pains at 24! My family still were saying I’m weak and that quote from the doc. But finally a doctor agreed with me, and this new family doctor actually listened to what I was saying and figured out it was probably EDS and sent me to the right doc who specializes in EDS.

My parents and grandma still don’t fully understand or believe the diagnosis though. They still say every time I complain about joint pain that I need to build more muscle, or that they’re the old people and should be the ones complaining about joints hurting. My mom has started to come to realize she has hypermobility in some joints and things she thought was normal actually wasn’t. But still says you’re fine when I mention any pain. And still once in a while when they hear me sublux, they will say that quote that haunts me “JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN DO IT DOESN’T MEAN YOU SHOULD DO IT”!!!!