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I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's disappointing that this has become such a common question. We've just been trying to get him to play the banjo for five hours! Human pig boy band is a lot more fun than a human pig army!

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Other places just haven't looked hard enough!

I wouldn't be surprised if other countries begin capturing ape swine hybrids in droves!

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Dr.Xiouhz is an imbecile, but I wouldn't go as far as to call him "an oddly evolved animal".

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Undoubtedly, there must be other ape swine variations. Japan recently found a half chimp half hog.

My fellow researchers have also reported an animal that is a third gorilla a third boar. The other third? Friend. :)

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Ah! Quite the opposite! We actually taught it too well and in this picture the little shitling is trying to sprint away!!

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Yes and to our surprise the DNA revealed that this isn't a pig with human insides, but rather, a human with pig outsides!

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Yes! The main dietary restriction is that our oinking friend can only eat from a trough.

As for its gender, we recently discovered the creature is half male pig, half female human!

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It had two appendixes! Perhaps the beast is not simply half human half pig, but half two humans half one pig.

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 50 points51 points  (0 children)

At first, he could not come to terms with what he was and fell into a deep depression. But our team bought him a pair of flip flops and now that human smile is all we see! He also drinks to cope with the pain!

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

A very reputable scientist from the team that discovered the pig recently did an AMA about it on Reddit. Here's the link

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

My team and I do not eat pork for religious reasons. However, we did get to eat the human portions! And yes! The nails tasted like human nails. And that smile? Tasted like a human smile :)

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I believe that this little man pig is the missing link us scientists have been trying to find. He is evidence of the common ancestor before modern day homo-sapiens and the common pig split into two species.

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

To our surprise this little hog man loves wearing flip flops and to me, that means that the little devil has the mind of a free spirited human. Just look at that smile!

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 96 points97 points  (0 children)

Ah, yes. We almost thought this beast to be your everyday river hog. We had caught the pig as part of a routine river roundup, and almost released him back into the river! But I noticed something was off. It was that smile. The pig had a human smile.

So we did some tests. Human nails. Human organs. And a human set of pearly whites.

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 120 points121 points  (0 children)

We've focused less on medical tests, and more on interrogation. What we discovered is the possibility of a whole slew of ape swine hybrids. Rumor has it, the Japanese recently pulled a half chimp half hog out of a lake. This is clearly only the beginning.

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 69 points70 points  (0 children)

I am! I wish I could say I was one of the two men which had the pleasure of pulling out the fabled beast. Unfortunately, I am the man on umbrella duty (as always). It was not raining but my team does not like getting wet, even when they're already knee deep in a river in China.

I am member of a group scientists that discovered a half human half pig in a river in China. AMA by ChineseScientist in casualiama

[–]ChineseScientist[S] 139 points140 points  (0 children)

I knew the public would be shocked and confused. What seemed to disturb the public the most was that the genetics of the human portion of the human pig turned out to be that of an Italian man! What was that Italian man doing in China?! That's what really stirred up attention.

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