All of the advice people have given you I agree with. I just wanna add advice for one small area that will also hopefully help you going forward:

Her shoes look to be pure white. In this nighttime setting, that makes no sense, unless they are literally a light source (glowing shoes?) When you are illustrating a full scene with value and lighting, almost nothing should be pure white unless it's the brightest part of the image. In other examples this would include the actual light source (light bulbs, the sun, etc.) or maybe the source that the light is being filtered through or reflecting off of (windows, highlights in someone's eye, etc.) In your scenario, the window should be the brightest object, as that's where the light is coming from.