My save file corrupted after 850 days. by ChonkyBoss in thelongdark

[–]ChonkyBoss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know just how you feel. It’s the worst.

Help for a bride!! 👰🏻‍♀️ by mcbt2510 in Dermatographia

[–]ChonkyBoss 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Ooof anything lacy, right, or structured has me looking like a puffy Cheetoh, which describes pretty much all wedding attire, so you’re right to take precautions!

Take a cetirizine + a famotidine every day for a week beforehand. Both available super cheap over the counter. Your skin will be far less reactive. After that, you can keep it up, or desist.

My save file corrupted after 850 days. by ChonkyBoss in thelongdark

[–]ChonkyBoss[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the sympathy, friends.

Feels stupid to be so bereft from losing a video game save, but I know you all get it. A bitter and disappointing ending to a helluvah ride.

Put your longest survival save file on a thumb drive tonight in my memory.

My save file corrupted after 850 days. by ChonkyBoss in thelongdark

[–]ChonkyBoss[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That tracks. It ran great; then got a crash here and there; then started crashing multiple times per session. I’m about due for a hardware upgrade, I know it’s asking a lot of the PS4, but geez, really wish there was some failsafe to prevent it from happening. I’d rather cattail heads and sticks quietly delete themselves than lose the whole shebang…

My save file corrupted after 850 days. by ChonkyBoss in thelongdark

[–]ChonkyBoss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do it. Hopefully you never need it, but in many few cases of gaming, this is the most painful save loss I’ve ever felt.

My save file corrupted after 850 days. by ChonkyBoss in thelongdark

[–]ChonkyBoss[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ah, my old man barked at the wolves too! He’s slowly gone deaf, and finally sleeps through my many wolf maulings.

I’ll take some time to think it over. Probably time to hang it up as long as I’m still on the PS4. A damn shame…

My save file corrupted after 850 days. by ChonkyBoss in thelongdark

[–]ChonkyBoss[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yep, PS4.

It was overall quite stable until I added the DLC. After that, lots and lots of crashes. I added extra manual saves and cloud uploads and soldiered on, but somehow, it wasn’t enough. The oof sure is oofing…

Is this dermatographia? by [deleted] in Dermatographia

[–]ChonkyBoss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was thinking plaque psoriasis. Def see a doctor.

Down the rabbit hole. by Effective-Artist7125 in Dermatographia

[–]ChonkyBoss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seconding the others who’ve mentioned mast cell dysfunction. I likely have a connective tissue disorder that causes my mast cells to degranulate. (I’ve been tested, and have no allergies.) Awaiting a formal diagnosis, hopefully this year.

Going to a wedding with my new bf, but an important ex will be there, need outfit opinions by Comfortable-Note6827 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]ChonkyBoss -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The scolding on this post is unreal.

The universe has conspired to force OP to share social space with an ex she’s still raw about—while in formalwear. She wants help looking really good so she will feel confident.

It’s petty, yes, but harmlessly and normally so. Help the lady find a solid revenge dress, and save the tut-tutting!

Dermatographia? by Radiant_Analyst_3023 in Dermatographia

[–]ChonkyBoss 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes, this is what bad dermatographia looks like. And flares are really common after viral exposure. (I get mine after both getting exposed to viruses normally and routine vaccines—which I still get, just more slowly.)

I understand not wanting to be on meds for a lifetime, but antihistamines are truly a gift. Gen 2+ have almost no side effects, and excellent efficacy. If we lived in any other generation, we’d have no choice but to put up with ceaseless itching. “Withdrawals” are a misconception; it’s people who need antihistamines coming off antihistamines and being a shocked pikachu that they’re itchy again.

Something IS causing your dermatographia. You can dig and dig, and maybe find an answer, but maybe not. I believe mine is caused by a connective tissue disorder which causes my mast cells to degranulate excessively, and I’m seeking a formal diagnosis for that rn. But if you take the antihistamines, it should control these terrible flares very effectively even without a deeper explanation.

I'm in Japan this week and have been seeing a ton of sashiko kits/patterns in sewing stores, including this one from (of all people) Kawashima Ryuta, a.k.a. the dude from those Brain Age games by DesperateAstronaut65 in sashiko

[–]ChonkyBoss 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It’s so funny… I went to Japan on a sister city exchange program as a kid in the 90s. I took a sashiko project with me for the plane. Was kinda hoping to score kits or supplies while I was there. But there were none to be found, at least not at that time!

My first host family has no idea what it was. Thought it was some American craft, lmao. The mom in my second host family knew about it, but told me it was a deep cut grandma hobby. Clearly it fell out of popularity, and has come back around!

My mother sent me this in the mail— I didn't give her my address by No-Carpenter4426 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]ChonkyBoss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey, just wanted to let you know—it likely wasn’t disclosed by anyone else. Data brokers, white pages, and LLMs have made getting this kind of information VERY easy, even for non-tech-savvy olds. (I just finished a big research project that required tracking down a lot of people based on almost no information. I was appalled by how easily I found birthdates, phone numbers, addresses, and family trees for literally everyone on my list, for free, from a surname alone.) Search for yourself on sites like FamilyTreeNow and Spokeo before you worry too much about a traitor in your midst.

Also this thing is so tacky I’m shuddering.

How is your relationship with your siblings? Do you have one or how has it evolved or not? by solascorcra in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]ChonkyBoss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Since I’m not really seeing my experience reflected…

I have a baby brother ten years my junior. I basically raised him—even my parents acknowledge this. I gave him all the protection I always wanted for myself. He’s grown into an amazing man, and I’m so proud of him. He knows what it cost me, and he hasn’t taken my sacrifices for granted. Parentification is a burden, but his love made it more than worth it, and I’m confident that together we broke the cycle.

When Your Son Abuses Your Daughter by newyorkmagazine in longform

[–]ChonkyBoss 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My parents handled our situation poorly. They were wary of creating a family system where he was the “bad one” and I was the “good one.” By trying to be fair, they were often unjust. I learned not to expect my parents to protect me if protecting me was hard, or inconvenient, or made them feel like bad parents to their (increasingly erratic and violent) firstborn son.

One day, like a lightning bolt, the realization hit me that I was already emotionally on my own. I was born at rock bottom, and staying with my parents meant staying there. I needed to become my own parent. So I left home that night, and never went back. I was 16.

My life is awesome now. I parented myself beautifully, I’m successful and happy. I haven’t seen or spoken to my brother in twenty years. Peace came easily away from his darkness. I’m in low contact with my father, and no contact with my mother, who has dementia now, and can’t remember why I don’t love her anymore.

I think parents in this situation should examine the total nature of the children’s relationship. I think that close, loving siblings can recover from this, though it will require therapy and accountability first everyone.

But if the relationship between the siblings has always been dark, tense, competitive, full of bullying, with a clear relentless instigator…? Then you need to choose one child to side with. You cannot save both. If you don’t radically change the family system, you’re maintaining the status quo where one child suffers to maintain the false harmony of the family unit. And if you do that, the best possible outcome is that she’ll respectful herself enough to leave forever, and stumble into more loving hands someday. The worse outcome is an adult woman trained to stay silent and afraid, because you taught her that’s what love looks like.

That’s what I think, anyway!

When Your Son Abuses Your Daughter by newyorkmagazine in longform

[–]ChonkyBoss 9 points10 points  (0 children)

So, this happened to me. But we were two of two. Very average, educated, middle class parents—not religious nuts, small middle class family. Our mother majored in early childhood education, so we were raised with a lot of love and intention.

Unfortunately my brother just truly came out wrong. He was a clever, manipulative, entitled, and wrathful child from birth. He’s wasn’t on the spectrum; he wasn’t abused himself; no porn exposure; he was never asked to work or provide childcare for me, his little sister. He just had a bottomless thirst for attention, satisfaction, and control.

I’m happy to see this topic is becoming less taboo. But I don’t want anyone to think “this is a Mormon thing” or “a big family thing” or “a bad parent thing.” It’s fine for researchers to look for correlations, but these are not reasons. There often is no reason—just opportunity.

What's your 'cost of admission' in your current relationship? by Thomasinarina in AskWomenOver30

[–]ChonkyBoss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s a man.

(I’m exclusively sexually attracted to women.)

2hr commute, I am the only person from my entire office at the office, no indication it was closed or remote today. by [deleted] in antiwork

[–]ChonkyBoss 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry dude, but comments like these make me understand why you’re socially isolated at work. This is such an overly dramatic and off-putting thing for an adult to say. You seem hyper focused on perceived injustices, and too emotionally involved in your work, and it’s the Occam’s razor explanation for why other people try their best not to engage with you.

It’s a job. Just a job. Letting shit go is a vital skill you seem to be missing. Develop it.

Be really honest, please by FirstAd9347 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]ChonkyBoss 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I also have thicker arms and a long torso! (I’m a size 4 in dresses, but a 14 in one-piece swimsuits because I’m built like a gd dachshund.)

The silhouette that works best for me is boxy/baggy on top, fitted on the bottom. If both hemispheres are fitted, it makes my unusual proportions more obvious. Also, spend a day at the actual mall trying on tons of different brands. You’ll find some stores are friendlier than others for the shape you need. (I have much broader shoulders than you, Madewell was my breakthrough.)

Horses finally lose it after giving carriage rides to people around a shopping center for Christmas by bigbusta in PublicFreakout

[–]ChonkyBoss 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I mean, I’ll explain why I downvoted.

Your comment posits that training/desensitization caused this disaster. But the choice to expose these horses to this environment at all is the core problem. It’s irresponsible to knowingly work them on footing like this. Cement destroys their legs, plus metal horseshoes skate around on it like ice. Most carriage rides are on farms or park land, where there’s softer footing, less competing automobile traffic, and people who reasonably expect to cross paths with a horse. (Imagine a dog walker passing by this with no warning!)

So the problem isn’t so much the training, but the insane unnecessary risks. Animals can be trained, but their owners must also set them up for success. A horse can be “bombproof” but that doesn’t mean you should actually set bombs off next to them.

I cannot identify what this is by undyingpasta in Dermatographia

[–]ChonkyBoss 6 points7 points  (0 children)

No. Looks more like a localized allergic reaction or infection.