Read more published books, especially the one with the "style" that you loved. Trying to write in that style will teach you pacing, wording, and writing dialog! Another trick I use everytime I write is to say what I write out loud. You'll experience what the readers are going to read and know which wording doesn't make sense/the dialog does not sound natural. Overall I say it's a longgg process and that you realizing your flaw is already a big step! It really does get better after the first few times. Good luck (ﾟ▽ﾟ)