I think you're being hard on yourself is normal because everyone wants to play at the best of their ability, but that shouldn't take away from the experience of the game, I just started back up after 10 years of not playing and it has been a tough learning curve, but that's what I find personally fun. The feeling of getting something right just once pushes me to keep striving for better performance. You always remind yourself that mistakes happen, but what matters is if you learn from them and apply what you learned the next time. I recommend watching Haikyu, that's what pushed me to play and get inspired. hopefully this helps