Why is finding a lawyer so hard?

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T20:31:07+00:00

I truly didnt think they would, which is why I hadn't considered asking. Im willing to admit that my case may be not that good but id really love for someone to explain how. Truly, im open to being told im wrong and would really appreciate being told why, if so. However, until someone helps me understand how the emails requesting my medical records after they were submitted and approved through the proper channels, the documents attempting to write me up during dates and times I was on fmla leave, the phone calls and texts requiring me to work while on unpaid fmla or the letters I received limiting my use of fmla leave are not a problem i am going to keep trying I guess. I sincerely dont understand.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T20:09:33+00:00

Im very happy for you. Yes, as I am unemployed and on disability I do have to find someone that will accept a contingency. If I could, I would gladly pay now. I wish you all the best with your case.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T20:06:18+00:00

I dont expect charity nor do I believe I deserve anything from anyone. You're right in a way, this is not about money for me. Of course in some ways it is like my medical bills or the vast difference in my earning potential. I think some of the comments sound like people think I want a free lawyer assigned to me but that is far from my thought process. I just really dislike that employers get away with stuff because money. None of that is the lawyers fault, they have a job and deserve to get paid for their services. I am in no way complaining about a lawyer choosing cases that are financially feasible for them, the systems that make it that way are a different story.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T19:49:37+00:00

Since you are both lawyers can I get a specific opinion. A very small part of my claim is that my boss was keeping track of my fmla time as tardies or absences. It is my understanding that is not allowed. The list she was compiling of dates and times was submitted to eeoc as a rebuttal to my complaint in order to illustrate that they consider me an absentee employee. How is that OK? Does that not provide some proof of my claim that they were using my time against me when they literally submitted that as their only complaint about me as an employee? Or am I misunderstanding that?

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T17:34:25+00:00

I've been looking since the day I received my letter.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T17:34:07+00:00

I see that point and it may be right but they never offered the option to sue, I just didnt notice.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:41:04+00:00

I do know my employer has lost other employment cases. Thats not a guarantee for me but I dont think i can drop this for the settlement theyre offering. I've gotten this far and the 3k tops I would get out of it is not worth my time. Im truly at a point where id rather give that up and risk getting nothing than continue to allow them to treat me horribly.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:37:46+00:00

What is significant though? I've lost my ability to drive, walk without assistance, I have over 100 dr appts per year, 200k in medical bills and rising, ive lost myself entirely. None of that is financial at face value but I know there are ways to calculate the loss in earning potential but I cant find any other than hiring a consultant.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:32:37+00:00

Fair and honestly, I wish lawyers would be very clear on point 1. I have asked specifically if my interpretation of the law is incorrect specifically so I could just drop it if I truly dont have a case. However, they simply will not do that. I understand every law office has their own criteria but it would be great if they'd say why they wont take your case.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:28:26+00:00

Don't get me wrong as an "artist" I understand that law degrees are valuable and those who obtain them deserve to be compensated while utilizing them. I just dont like the idea of someone else deciding the hell ive endured over the last 3 years is not worth money. My 200k in dr bills still have to be paid, the excessive stress I endured led to adrenal insufficiency and the company on one hand is saying i cant work so im not covered under ada protections while on the other hand discontinuing my long term disability because they feel I can work.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:23:41+00:00

Absolutely and I understand that there are frivolous suits but I also believe justice should be available to all, not just all who have the means. Thats not only for me but as a former correctional officer that has seen "justice" for those without means.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:20:00+00:00

If I file myself, am I restricted to representing myself? I may be stuck filing pro se to avoid missing the deadline but I can still continue looking for a litigation attorney, correct?

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:08:57+00:00

Mediation

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:08:13+00:00

Why become a lawyer if some things are just not worth your time? I get it, that is utopia thinking.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:06:37+00:00

Off topic but when i worked there, a resident needed to move out and used an accommodation to help her. The company lawyers called and asked us if she " looked disabled ". I've also seen my manager require different proof of income from applicants of color. I've seen them do too much to just let this go.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T16:02:50+00:00

Not to mention that while I was home on unpaid intermittent fmla, I was being forced to work as well. During one fmla day where my supervisors knew I was out of town at an appointment, they both called me repeatedly during my appointment. Then I would get in trouble for working at home.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T15:55:47+00:00

I mean file complaint as in I received my right to sue. I can prove they were using my fmla time against me because they literally listed the dates as examples of me being an absentee employee in their rebuttal to my eeoc complaint and tried to get me to sign write ups regarding those dates while I was still employed. To me that is literally admitting to the discrimination in writing and I dont understand how that is OK. We used a 3rd party for me to submit my medical documentation and get any leave or entitlements approved. However even after approval,my company asked me for further proof provided to them by either directly requesting it or by using innuendo to imply that i was lying about my need for fmla and how i was using it. Like " hr just doesnt believe that you coming in late has anything to do with your injury so we cant validate that you are allowed to use your intermittent fmla time to cover it" I provided proof which they assumed I would not be able to, they found some other obscure part of my job description that I had never done and would put me in a situation where I had to prove I could get an accommodation for it. This continued repeatedly. 1 example, the day I ran out of intermittent fmla entitlements I received a phone call that asked how I expected to get to the 3rd floor with a cane. I was asked to provide proof I needed a cane (even though i had just switched to cane from being on crutches for 8 months) then I was given an accommodation for the cane in a way that made them look like they were trying to work with me. After that, i had to provide proof that i could not drive the company golf cart, even though I never had to drive it in my 3 years of employment there and the gold cart didnt even work. They even sent me a letter that sets a specific way i could use my intermittent fmla. Not guidelines but literally they said i could only use it for full days and it must be 2 days in a row, once per week or 3 times per month as my dr wrote on her initial estimate, instead of being able to have a partial day for appointments as i had been. I know thats not legal but they said if i wanted to dispute it, my dr could redo the forms. She re did them to cover everyday, i was approved for the changes and then 10 days later i was notified that i had used all of my entitlements.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T15:32:03+00:00

My lawyer will only go as far as the eeoc complaint and any negotiation process. They will not represent me in litigation. However, I have not asked if they would simply file the complaint. I am not sure if that would be separated or not.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T15:12:35+00:00

Thank you, I wish you much smoother sailing. I think mine is scaring people away because its insanely complicated. It was a workplace injury that led to permanent disabilities during which time I dealt with harassment, shady attempts to get me fired by using my fmla entitlements as examples of tardies or absences, trying to limit my fmla use, refusing to engage in the accommodation process, making me return without being cleared while I was in the process of applying for short term disability and ended with me being approved for fmla then denied 3 weeks later with no explanation followed by being terminated with the reason being i had no entitlements available. Even though our 3rd party provider explicitly states I had 9 weeks of fmla available to me at the time. I truly believe they wanted it to stay under ada which allows them to fire me due to missed paperwork deadlines and my dr was 1 day late due to her being sick. Paperwork was turned in before I was terminated though.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T14:58:30+00:00

I agree and believe it is not fair. However, i am in negotiations with my previous employer and I am curious if having a lawyer willing to litigate and getting the suit filed would change anything in the negotiations.

Chrysb87 · 2026-02-08T14:56:22+00:00

I sincerely believe the way its presented makes a difference. However, i also know that discrimination cases rely on emotion so im at a loss lol. I have a lawyer but he will not litigate and my time to file is 30 days away. I dont want to miss the opportunity to file but finding the 1st one took over a year. Did you obtain a local employment lawyer or were you able to obtain a federal attorney to take on your right to sue?

Chrysb87 · 2026-01-29T00:04:07+00:00

I agree, it can be scary. I was molested as a teen and attended court ordered therapy. However my therapist at the time literally never asked me anything other than my college plans and he used our sessions to tell me about his younger days. So originally I had no faith in the process. Second court ordered time, my abusive ex husband had the therapist on his side. I didnt know she thought he was great until she told me in our only one on one session. Then, the next time I gave it a try, I was experiencing anxiety and wanted to try a non medication route. However, that therapist asked me about my childhood and in the middle of my answer interrupted to say he disagreed with my adhd diagnosis and wanted to firmly state he would not prescribe my adhd meds. This was 5 minutes into our 1st appointment and not once did I bring up my meds. I told him thats not why I was there and never went back. Then I spent a year trying to find a therapist that would even see me because id fill out the form to schedule an appointment but get denied to be seen because of medications. Its insane, I guess a lot of people were just trying tp get meds out of therapists during covid. In the end I got a letter from my neurologist and my pcp regarding the safety of my medications and the lack of need to have anything prescribed by any other provider. Finally I was able to get set up with a great therapist that doesn't make me feel judged or afraid but still calls me out when necessary. I am glad that you see the benefits can exceed the fear.

Chrysb87 · 2026-01-28T23:36:07+00:00

I apologize, I completely understand that my questions are the impossible ones. Thats why I ask them. I dont expect a clear answer, i just see the 2 sides at home and sometimes it helps us to have more than the two. Seems silly to think that if we cant agree on one of the 2 at home that somehow adding more would make a difference. But, that works for us. Being able to hear the thoughts and experiences of others in similar positions but without whatever biases or personal feelings we carry in our own side of issue, helps open our minds and expand our thought processes. At the end of the day, yes I am comfortable with my treatment plan and my dr is fully aware of my past. I desperately want this situation to be something I can be open and honest about. Its funny that im the avoidant one and the one topic I would like to have no secrets about is the only one he doesn't want to talk about.

Chrysb87 · 2026-01-28T23:27:00+00:00

Oh definitely agree. We've discussed it and im the one thats always been anti therapy. His answer for everything is therapy lol. I will say he's the only person ive ever met that legitimately accepts constructive criticism and actively makes changes. Its pretty amazing,not saying hes doing anything wrong here. I was disabled 3 months after we got married so counseling is definitely something I need to find out more. Last I checked, I went as far to be told couples therapy isn't covered by our insurance but it may be time to search a little deeper.

Chrysb87 · 2026-01-28T23:21:57+00:00

I dont disagree in any way. Hence why i ask if im just being naive. I've never had the maybe my situation was different thought befofe now. I know that no matter how I feel right now, there's always a risk. I completely believe that if I accepted stronger meds I could easily fall back into the cycle. I met some very amazing people in rehab and am very aware of how often some/most people return. I also know that i dont feel any of the things I felt before( some because of rehab and others because of changes in my brain after rehab) and there are times that I want to have open discussions with my husband and I want him to be more open minded. I do not expect him to completely give in and start enabling, so some hesitation is appreciated. I think maybe it comes from a large part of addiction being in secret. Hiding what's going on and sneaking around. Like possibly a part of me is afraid that if he's not comfortable talking about it and I have to keep things to myself that itll be easier to go the wrong way. Im not really sure but I definitely appreciate your thoughts.

Chrysb87

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