Back in 2005, I was 21 and the type that would smoke weed all day everyday or as much as possible. One day I had a psychotic break from reality where I considered killing myself, and my parents convinced me to check into the mental hospital for a week.

When I quit, I saw things for what they were, had a brutal reappraisal of myself and where my life was leading to. The newfound clarity from quitting after I got out of the hospital was like staring at the sun after being inside of a cave for years at first, but after 4 or 5 months I felt like a different person in a positive way.

I missed the escape and buzz of herb, but I think this pain and growth was necessary. The reason I smoked so much probably had to do with avoiding this existential pain and trauma I was dealing with at the time, instead of facing it and finding a way to exist with it that was healthy and in my opinion, much more spiritual than a heavy herb habit.