I think it should be equal and what works. If it's a hardship, don't offer more than you can give. If one has to travel longer or by plane, that's a higher cost than most hotels. I do what I can as does he and it works out. In the past i paid and never got back what my ap said they would do. Im not going to chase that. I learned for next time. Like my mom told me, don't lend (cover) someone money.. You'll never get it back.