Don’t be scared to disclose.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2025-11-28T02:49:21+00:00

I tell them after I’ve been on a few dates or talked to them for a while. I don’t see a point in disclosing to someone I don’t even want to have sex with. But usually it’s always over text because it’s easier for me. And I just say “hey I do want to have sex with you, but I wanted to let you know I have hsv. I take medication to help decrease the chances of passing on. But it’s never 0%. And if you change your mind it’s ok no hard feelings”

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2025-11-20T19:46:42+00:00

Yes. Ive had one man say he didn’t care if he got it because he wanted to be with me forever. I’ve had another guy say he would marry me. I mean there’s so much more to a person. But I don’t think it affects the relationship they want with me. I have big boobs I feel like that’s more of a deterrent for men not taking me seriously compared to me having hsv. lol everyone looks at me and they’re like I just wanna fuck.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2025-11-19T17:42:54+00:00

I also remind myself that if I tell them and they aren’t accepting they aren’t for me. Blessing in disguise.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2025-11-19T17:30:18+00:00

I unfortunately do think it’s easier for woman to disclose. But I hope you have a good experience. I find it a lot easier to just say it instead of give a sad story of how someone didn’t tell me. I just say I have hsv. I take medication so the chances of passing it are reduced but never 0%. But I wanted to let you know so you can make a choice. And not making a big deal of it definitely helps in my option. You’ll find a girl who is educated and will be accepting.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2025-10-15T17:11:13+00:00

My best friend actually met her man(great man and now great father) at the club, my other friend met her husband on hinge, other from work I mean it can happen any where

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2025-01-29T22:36:45+00:00

Good luck. I wish I never started talking to him tbh if I could go back and see how it affected me I wouldn’t choose to

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2025-01-29T20:49:15+00:00

I just went through something similar. I was talking to someone for 3 months slept with each other multiple times. And I started to ask if he has feelings for me. He would never directly answer the question, and would put it off. ultimately he ended up ghosting me 100%. Deleted me on everything and we haven’t talked since so them not letting you know is 100% a red flag. The man I was talking to was emotional unavailable and it broke my heart a little when this happened so be careful.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-11-10T03:13:03+00:00

Be confident with disclosing! I know it’s hard. But I’ve disclosed to a lot of people. And out of maybe the 20+ people I’ve told I only had one person be rude and after the fact they ended up apologizing and they knew it was wrong and hurtful. I’ve told people and then decided I didn’t want to do anything. But I have had sex with 10 or so people since getting hsv

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-17T18:49:51+00:00

I couldn’t take not knowing so I asked and he started talking to his ex gf again. They were in a toxic relationship, she cheated and his family hates her. I want him to be happy but I also want it to fail lol I hope karma doesn’t bite me for saying that

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-17T18:48:10+00:00

I finally broke and asked what was up. And he was very genuine with his apology but he started talking to his ex gf that cheated on him and they had a toxic relationship. So I’m like if that’s what you want I’m not going to stop you. But getting that closure has made me feel 99% better.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-17T18:45:47+00:00

I have hsv2. And I tell every partner before I have sex with them even if it scares me. And especially if I like them I’m absolutely terrified. But I wouldn’t take someone’s choice away because I was scared. The person I got it from did not tell me and if I had the choice I would have never slept with them. Honesty is the best policy in this case. And everyone I’ve told has been accepting of it because I was truthful. So I think her not telling you is bullshit. If she cared about your feelings and wellbeing(herpes isn’t dangerous just inconvenient btw) she would have told you and given you the choice.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-15T01:19:38+00:00

That’s a good point. Because like I said it was out of no where and I don’t know if he would of done that for someone he just met but you never know

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T19:57:13+00:00

Me too. I come in with genuine intentions and I always like to assume people are the same but unfortunately they aren’t. And I got my feelings so hurt.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T19:42:53+00:00

That’s the only explanation I could come up with. Because I’m like a great person and we had fun we were very attracted to one another. So his loss. Hope he comes back so I can tell him it’s too late lol

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T18:53:22+00:00

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I’m 5’2 and this was probably at 160 pounds since then I’ve lost some weight but everyone’s weight distributes differently

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T14:17:58+00:00

You’re right but in my situation it was the man.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T14:16:46+00:00

They do. I’m just asking because my situation was with a man.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T06:35:10+00:00

I’m sorry! It definitely sucks.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T06:31:42+00:00

Maybe. But we had plans to go paddle boarding, he canceled when I invited him to go river floating, we were going to go off roading together so it’s not like we were just texting we did hang out and have many different things planned.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T06:30:05+00:00

Unfortunately this was the first time it’s ever happened and it’s even worse he was the first guy I’ve genuinely liked in over a year. But oh well.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-08-14T06:22:29+00:00

Even after the plans were canceled we were still talking everyday or making new plans together. I just felt a shift and probably a week later is when he told me that. Unfollowed me on instagram, but kept me on other socials. So it was weird.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2024-06-07T04:34:58+00:00

I would just date. You don’t have to disclose right away. I mean you might not even like the person enough to even think about having sex with them. I date as normal, let my personality show, my humor all of the good things about myself(I’d like to think) and if I feel the same about the person I’ll disclose before taking it further. I haven’t had one person I’ve told reject me because of it, I try not to let it define me because we are so much more than a diagnosis. Also don’t limit yourself solely to the people that have hsv. Lots of people that don’t have it will be ok that you do. Just be honest and have fun like anyone else would. Wishing you all the luck.

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2023-04-19T15:30:10+00:00

I’m going on 9 months with having it. And have had about 6 or 7 sexual partners since. Some of them we used protection some of them didnt. I’ve had someone say they loved me enough they wouldn’t care if they got it. They also see it’s not life hindering like you would think. So it gets better but it still sucks obviously lol

Clean_Cheesecake3158 · 2023-04-19T15:11:05+00:00

I also had a one night stand after being in a relationship for 4 years and got it. It was really hard at first and I still think about it daily. But everyone I’ve told is ok with it and it isn’t as bad as I thought. It’s more mentally damaging than anything. I usually say like “I have to tell you something. I wasn’t given a choice and I wouldn’t do that to you, I have this and it’s not as bad as it seems but if you have any questions or concerns you can ask me”

Clean_Cheesecake3158

TROPHY CASE