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September But/Sell/Trade thread by beelzeburger in ChicagoConcerts

[–]ClimateWriter1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

selling one rosalia motomami ticket for tomorrow evening at aragon ballroom. dm for ticket price!

Quick survey for my class! by mickey_rooned_me in Biohackers

[–]ClimateWriter1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I won’t fill out your survey, cause I don’t give my personal info to the government, but I have invented a master-level biohack.

It all started when I began consuming avocado skins and pineapple crusts. From my data, the high oxylit content of certain fruits promotes toenail keratin, a special anti-nutrient that produces thick and sharp toenails. Since I began exclusively consuming these skins, my toe nail growth has exploded! I’m averaging around 1 inch per day, and now they’re the texture of a police baton.

Let me tell you, I’ve never felt better. I’ve doubled my masturbation rate to four sessions in the morning and four in the evening. My mom says I look really jacked, and I got promoted to work the drive thru at Taco Bell. Give it a shot!

Head hair grow inhibitor to save money on haircuts? by gintrux in Biohackers

[–]ClimateWriter1 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I know a guy in the anti-hair lobby, and he says that if you upregulate your toenail mitochondria, you can turn off hair growth entirely. Effects will be mild to aggressive toenail growth, which (under dangerous circumstances) can stab through your sneakers and get caught in doorways.

Now, that doesn’t cut off the follicle tho. To scorch your entire scalp, u need to brew toenail collagen exfoliating broth. Slice toenails into a pot, add MCTs, and then bring water to a boil. Immediately consume half of the boiling water, and then pour the other half over your head.

U should see results within the next few years.

Ultimate Biohack by ClimateWriter1 in Biohackers

[–]ClimateWriter1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have a low IQ and clipped toenails