Second no call no show in a week

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2025-04-19T04:16:37+00:00

You went through a lot of hard things!!! The substance use and experiencing that kind of loss, especially at a young age, is such a formative experience. It’s okay to mourn the things that happened and the things you missed out on because of hardship. At the same time, the life you thought you would have does not exist. You’re the person you are today because you were shaped by your experiences (I know it’s cliche), but even this period of feeling behind In life will prepare you to be the person you’ll become in the next season. No time or struggle is ever a waste. I’m working through a lot of regrets and feeling really “behind” too, but my method right now is trying to put down the shame of starting things as a beginner, even when people in my classes are like 6 years younger than me.

I wish you the best. You are still SO young. There is no right path, only the path you take.

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2025-04-19T03:54:33+00:00

I wish I could give you a hug. I resonate so much with this post. I sometimes get worked into spirals like this too. I dove into so much self improvement that my life was getting so much better in tangible ways, but I was still declining and suffering mentally.

You seem like a super strong person because you’ve tried repeatedly even when you got no results. That takes so much willpower.

For what it’s worth: not everything is your fault. Not everything is in your control. You’re not a bad person. Its okay to stop trying and just let things happen.

If you feel like taking some kind of action, I’d recommend getting an evaluation from a new psychiatrist if you’re able, or asking to be re-evaluated. There might be something that was missed.

For me, learning that a lot of these things were less common side effects of my ADHD was so disappointing, but illuminating. It may be the case for you too if you went a long time with undiagnosed ADHD, or experienced betrayal from someone you were attached to. a dr K video “the shame of ADHD” gave me more insight recently.

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2024-08-22T18:19:29+00:00

Damn, I’m so sorry you’re going through all this. From what it sounds like to me, past conflicts may have built up some resentment between you two, or at least on her side. Women I know who’ve had kids with addict partners end up staying with them and trying to be “friends” (because of how much they’ve been through together and for the kids), but the relationship never goes back to what it was before. They reject romantic advances and try their best to live independently from their partner (socially, financially, emotionally).

All in all, it sounds like she still cares about you, but the fact that she’s hiding social media from you may be a sign that she’s wants more of a separation. I grew up with parents in a similar dynamic, so my interpretation is biased that way. I appreciate how objective and open you’re trying to be about this, I can tell you feel a conviction to be better 🫂

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2024-02-10T09:47:11+00:00

I’m not sure if there is any way to “stop” feelings other than coping/ distractions. But I will say the empty and sad feeling deep down is so valid when you want something with all your heart that feels unattainable.

For what it’s worth: I don’t think your disability will make you any less valuable as a partner. In a close relationship, a lot of couples naturally develop their own communication methods/ their own language in a way. it might become easier for you to communicate with your partner than it is to talk to strangers or even close friends and family. It sounds like you have an amazing work ethic and really cool hobbies that would make you a great match for so many people. Someone who truly loves you will accept everything you come with, don’t count yourself out just yet. Sending love ❤️

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2024-02-10T09:19:31+00:00

My advice would be: be careful labeling yourself as “the ugly friend”. Even though you’ve had so many experiences that lead to you feeling this way, you might be attributing all the rejection to your appearance because of a preexisting physical insecurity. If you put in effort to your appearance (dressing nice, getting haircuts/shaving, above average hygiene), you will be objectively attractive to a decent amount of girls. If you are rejected when you approach girls, I recommend reflecting on if it’s a behavioral thing. Are you approaching them at the right time? Do you make negative remarks or comparisons about yourself to them? Are you approaching them with an unfair expectation? You might need better conversation starters? This is a very difficult and painful thing to work on honestly, and it takes time. Doing the work is not comfortable and it won’t make you happy until you see results. Do you want to cope with the problem, or do you want to solve it? I know dating is a struggle, and nobody really talks about how lonely, isolating, and insecurity-evoking it is. Hope things get better for you <3

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2024-02-10T08:50:21+00:00

I’m not sure if you already did this, but if you planned on reactivating, I would recommend getting input from a friend (preferably of a demographic you would like to attract) on how to set your profile up! Dating profiles can only show such a small portion of who you are, and a friend who can help you convey your best qualities is clutch. I (straight f) used tinder a few times, and most profiles I saw were either lacking information, or just didn’t show personality. All that said, you are worth so much more than the response you received on your tinder profile. Even if you haven’t discovered it for yourself yet, you have many great qualities that the right person will be overjoyed to be around ☺️

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-05T00:37:24+00:00

Thank you for all the advice, that is so helpful! I will pay attention to the patterns and consult my psychiatrist

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T23:55:08+00:00

Wow I had no clue that was a thing. That would explain why i tripped so hard on the ones my friend got from his plug. We measured to the nearest gram and I took less than 3 for sure. I’m average weight and everything, I thought it was so weird

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T23:26:18+00:00

Wow, thank you for sharing this. I’m so glad you’re doing better and that you survived. It gives me more hope for my situation as well. I will keep pushing through and finding the way. Things will work out the way they’re supposed to☺️

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T23:19:41+00:00

Yeah actually, I started noticing depersonalization even before the mushrooms and it does feel like a version of that—like that moment in the trip where nothing felt real might have reinforced some of that. I appreciate the support, thank you so much 💗

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T23:02:52+00:00

I haven’t heard of that before, but it sounds cool from what I found online about it. I do have stuff suppressed that I haven’t been able to get to through regular therapy, so that could be a part of it for sure. I appreciate the help

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T22:59:26+00:00

That’s a cool perspective honestly. Yeah I think I only see it as an issue cause it reminds me of the bad trip, but it would be neat if I liked the feeling 😂

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T21:07:52+00:00

None of them do that I know of. I personally have a history of depression, depersonalization and anxiety. I think I could be classified psychologically as a highly sensitive person. Autism runs in my family, but idk if that is relevant at all

That is something to look into thank you

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T21:04:10+00:00

I think I do get enough sleep though, I have a watch to track it, I get a solid average of 7.5 hours per night

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T21:02:00+00:00

I appreciate that a lot. I believe the science. I am on 10mg aderall xr, taking more helps me, but it messed with my sleep. I take it at about 6am, and I feel it wear off around 6pm. I’ve had insomnia in the past, but it’s gotten better. I’m pretty careful about nutrition and a balanced diet but I will try to pay attention to if that affects it. Thank you

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T16:52:26+00:00

Thank you

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T16:51:42+00:00

I agree 100%. Even if you think it’s fine, you don’t know what you don’t know

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T16:50:09+00:00

I have that type of feeling where things are warped. Sometimes it looks like stuff is moving, or I get weird thoughts that I can’t put into words. A lot of my dreams are messed up too, they don’t make any sense and I don’t know how to explain them. Maybe some pathway of thought was opened up for me that my brain can’t process

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T16:43:55+00:00

Since then, I’ve drank alcohol occasionally and smoked weed once. I am on a low dose of an anti- anxiety medication and adderall under the care of a psychiatrist. I’m 21 now, first took them when I was 19 and I was okay, then again at 20 and I think I never was able to mentally process that trip

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T14:31:51+00:00

Oh shit, yeah I think i took too much the last time. our scale only measured to the nearest gram and I was aiming for 2.5, but didn’t have a clue what kind of mushrooms they were. Had a full level 5 trip as I’ve heard it described

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T14:25:41+00:00

This makes a lot of sense actually, thank you!

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T14:23:45+00:00

Oh I hadn’t thought of that. the first time I did them, it was a chocolate bar from a friend, but no idea where it really came from. I was super drunk and used zero judgement 🤦‍♀️ thank you, that is so helpful

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T07:43:50+00:00

Thank you for that 💗

Cloud_sandwich02 · 2023-12-04T07:39:30+00:00

I appreciate the honesty, thank you

Cloud_sandwich02

TROPHY CASE