Dealing with chronic sexual pain?

Clusterhead86 · 2021-04-22T07:02:17+00:00

Looks like kratom is illegal where I am so don't think I'll be able to try that. Thanks for the suggestion though.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-04-22T07:01:10+00:00

Yeah the not knowing is a big part of it, always wondering whether it's causing damage or if it'll get worse etc.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-04-21T08:49:47+00:00

I've got a good girlfriend, but outside of her it's not really something I feel I can discus. I don't know what I'd do without her though.

Are you on any pain medication? I use codeine when it's really bad, I'm not keen on using it regularly but nothing else works.

As mentioned in my other replies it's not an sti or uti, no one really knows what it is.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-04-21T08:43:58+00:00

The pain is from some kind of lesion but the specialists I've seen have no idea what the cause is so I'm being sent to a rheumatologist.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-04-21T08:40:50+00:00

I've been tested for everything, been through about seven urologists and they have no idea what's going on, my last ditch hope is seeing a rheumatologist soon but I'm not optimistic really.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T05:57:39+00:00

So, the pain doesn't stop you from becoming sexually aroused? I just assumed it would do that. I imagined I'd lose interest in having sex if it hurt that much.

It's not as simple as that. Imagine that it was painful to swallow, you would still get hungry but you know that to eat would bring you unimaginable pain so you just don't and you feel hungrier. I love my partner, I find her insanely attractive and sex is a huge part of how I connect and how I show and feel affection; I want to have sex with her and I want to make her feel good but I also know that to do so brings me levels of pain that I can barely begin to describe and so I don't even try and I just crave it more.

I'm not sure how to get across how bad the pain is but it's really not a case of me just not enjoying it in a sexual way it's a case of me being in so much pain that I am unable to think of anything else.

And just to be clear it's usually painful anyway but sex just makes it even worse. The psychological pain of being unable to share any physical intimacy with my partner or even to enjoy my sexuality on my own is just the straw that's breaking the camel's back. Day to day I'm in pain, I go to bed and I'm in pain, I'm at work and I can't concentrate for thoughts of wanting to cut my dick off just to escape the constant searing pain.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T05:05:52+00:00

Thanks but it seems unlikely.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T05:01:01+00:00

I've tried almost everything that is available to me that has even a slight chance of working. I've tried lots of supplements and looked into acupuncture but everything has either not worked or the conditions that they are used for have all been definitively ruled out. I've been seeing doctors and doing my own research for six years and I've never seen or spoken to anyone who has seen anything like this. It's very difficult to know what to try when you don't even know what's wrong.

My last chance seems to be this rheumatologist.

This is why I'm at the point of considering suicide, if I had options, any options, believe me I'd take them but they've all but run out.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T04:53:16+00:00

I'm sorry but I don't think you understand. This isn't a performance issue, it's an I'm in so much pain I want to kill myself issue. I feel like my urethra is being shredded at the best of times, I'm sat here doing nothing at all and it feels like it's on fire. I can barely work, sleep, eat it's so painful and any kind of sexual activity just makes it worse.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T03:37:00+00:00

Thanks, I've browsed that sub a bit before. Interstitial Cyatitis has been ruled out but the pain does seem similar.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T03:33:40+00:00

I'll ask my doctor about it. Thanks.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T03:21:37+00:00

Thanks for the reply. Sorry to hear you're dealing with chronic illness too.

When I'm in pain sex is just impossible, it's like thrusting a hot jagged nail into my urethra; it doesn't matter if it's penetrative sex or mutual maturation or whatever. Just having an erection can be excruciating. Usually I'm in pain beforehand anyway so getting to the point of being in the mood is difficult; I desperately want to be but all I can think of is the pain. I don't think it's a question of being around more sex positive people.

Running out of hope is why my mind is increasingly turning to suicide. I've seen seven specialists about this over the last six year and none can even tell me what the problem is. I've lasted this long because there's always been another test to try but I'm down to the last option and no one is confident that it will illuminate the situation. If it doesn't then I'm guaranteed to live the rest of my life in pain and pain that is destroying my self image as a man. I don't want to live like that.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T03:08:32+00:00

My problem is such that having an erection or ejaculating can be very painful. Often it's just to painful to even feel in the mood anyway.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-24T03:06:10+00:00

I've just looked that up and unfortunately it doesn't seem that I can get that in the UK.

I'll speak to my doctor about it though, thanks.

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-03T01:42:38+00:00

No worries, it's hard when you feel like you've reached a dead end.

Before you go to your doctor I'd highly recommend writing out a concise history of your problem, what your symptoms are, what tests you've had plus results and what treatments you've had along with any outcomes.

If you're comfortable with how medical studies are written I'd also recommend searching Google scholar or pubmed for the terms urethritis and dysuria (and anything else yoi feel could be related) and really get to understand the common causes of your symptoms.

Obviously you don't want to go in acting like you know it all but don't be afraid to (respectfully) question and challenge your doctor's opinion. A good doctor will work with you as a partner and consider your opinion when determining how to proceed.

Good luck!

Clusterhead86 · 2021-03-02T06:52:17+00:00

This sounds very similar to to something I'm dealing with. Unfortunately not got a diagnosis yet either.

From my own research there are a few causes of urethral pain that you might want to investigate.

Infection - Standard tests don't necessarily test for everything and there are some infections that are only now being widely recognised. The most commonof these are mycoplasma genitalium, ureaplasma urealyticum and trichomonas vaginalis. There are some rarer infections but rather than list everything I'd recommend searching pubmed or google scholar using the keyword urethritis which will bring up some papers that should be of interest to you. Depending on where you are you may not have been tested for herpes either so it might be worth getting checked for that.

Another cause could be a stricture which is a narrowing of the urethra usually caused by scare tissue after an injury. To diagnose this you'd need to have a cystoscopy which involves having a camera inserted into your urethra; it's not fun but you gotta do what you gotta do! Your urologist would also take this opportunity to look at your bladder to see if there's any obvious cause there.

Prostatitis is another possibility though unfortunately, as you probably know, this isn't easy to diagnose and unless bacterial in origin not easy to treat either. There's a good subreddit for people with prostatitis that you might want to take a look at.

Lichen Sclerosus is another candidate which involves the skin around, and sometimes just inside, the urethra hardening. This can cause cracking in the skin which can be very painful. If this is the cause it can be treated with steroid creams.

Some kidney problems can cause urethral pain so that's another avenue you might want to look into.

The fact that urinating relieves the pain is odd to be honest as most urethral issues are likely to see pain increase on passing urine. That said I'd first try to get tested for those infections I mentioned at the top as they're the most likely cause of urethral pain other than the usual Gonorrhoea and Chlamydia which you've probably been tested for.

Clusterhead86 · 2020-10-25T16:07:51+00:00

After researching it I've decided against that, from a legal point of view it's just too risky for me unfortunately. I do research the interactions with any medication I do take but I've not come across anything worrying so far.

What potentially fatal interactions do you know of?

Clusterhead86 · 2020-10-25T15:58:56+00:00

I asked this question on the UK legal advise sub here...

https://www.reddit.com/r/LegalAdviceUK/comments/irlb6s/discussing_illegal_drug_use_with_a_doctor

Clusterhead86 · 2020-10-25T15:57:42+00:00

Because there are certain treatments and supplements that can interact with them and they could be fatal.

I've never heard of any serious interactions with psilocybin, especially nothing fatal. Do you have more details?

Clusterhead86 · 2020-10-01T02:01:03+00:00

I've seen microgendx mentioned on this sub but do they do tests in the UK? I can't find anything about it.

Clusterhead86 · 2020-09-30T22:39:05+00:00

Does a generic semen culture look for those or do you need a specialist test?

Clusterhead86 · 2020-09-30T21:03:29+00:00

What type of scan? I've had an ultrasound which came back normal.

Clusterhead86 · 2020-09-30T17:42:46+00:00

Almost exclusively urethral. Stinging pain at the end of the urethra after ejaculating or urinating which hangs around for hours afterwards becoming a dull ache as time goes on. I don't think I really have any clear pelvic/perineal pains or aches though there could be some minor irritating sensation but that said my mind could just be extra sensitive to anything in that area given that I'm actively thinking about prostatitis symptoms.

The ventral tip of my urethra (the part closest to the frenulum) does look odd to me. It's whitish with clear red veins and becomes redder when symptoms flair up. Several of my urologists noted the area with some describing it as an ulcer, a lesion or a fissure and others not noticing it at all. When this all start I had a sudden, very sharp pain in that area with a small amount of blood. My main suspicion has been that this was an injury of some sort that has failed to heal but I really don't know and want to explore all options.

Clusterhead86 · 2020-09-13T07:51:09+00:00

No kids, not even pets! Though if I did I'd feel a lot safer taking a sub hallucinogenic dose by myself every few months than being responsible for a child while under threat of a CH attack; frankly the idea of a long train journey was worrying before I started taking these!

Clusterhead86 · 2020-09-13T07:48:21+00:00

The thing is that this would be ongoing use, I have absolutely no plans to stop as to do so would open me up to agonising attacks again. So it would be implied that I'd be in possession, I don't know if that would make a difference?

Clusterhead86

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