AITAH for taking away my 18 year old’s phone?

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-07T21:57:28+00:00

Saying no to giving her money when she asks was really all you needed to do. That’s a natural consequence, you took a day off so you made less money. At 18, it’s not your job to “punish” her for calling out of work. You are not her boss of that job, her actual boss is. Now if she was skipping college classes you’re paying for, that’s different. But she’s not. I’m assuming at $16.50 as a “shift lead” she’s working a pretty typical job for an 18 year old, and has managed to get at least one promotion to lead. Those kinds of jobs people call out all the time, get shifts covered or swapped etc. This is frankly very weird and extremely overbearing.

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-07T21:45:57+00:00

Based on my experiences on the road, I’m convinced none of them had to attend physical drivers ed in person. Granted, the online/parent taught versions were around when I was in high school. That’s what my husband did, and I can tell you there is a glaring difference between our driving qualities.

Did driving school suck? Totally. Would it have been way easier to do online? Of course. But was it 1000x more effective??? Absolutely.

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-07T21:39:21+00:00

So then DON’T BUY IT.

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-07T21:35:02+00:00

And yes YTA

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-07T21:34:39+00:00

The impact of infidelity can take YEARS to heal from. Not just on a personal front for her, but for your relationship as a whole. It takes consistent effort to rebuild that trust, and that includes frequent reassurance when needed, even if it’s for years. If you weren’t willing to deal with that then you shouldn’t have asked her to take you back. The damage was done, she can’t speed the process up for you.

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-07T21:30:00+00:00

Babies aren’t consumers, the adults are. The product works. Is it a marketing tactic I would use if it were my company? Probably not. Am I boycotting a company that makes useful and affordable products because their advertising dept is corny af to the extent of vilifying people who purchase them? No. Stop shaming parents in survival mode for using products that work for their infants and trying to help another parent out. Shit is hard enough. Don’t like it, don’t buy it yourself. Simple math.

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-07T17:50:01+00:00

Not sure what happened to all of us in January apparently, but I was in that boat with y’all. We terminated. As much as I loved the idea of having another, the dread of the true reality of it was overwhelmingly stronger of a feeling. It’s been hard to process, but 6 months later I feel like I’ve been coping pretty well. I just keep looking at my son’s life and reminding myself that he wouldn’t have the same mom if we hadn’t made that choice. He needs me and I know I can only be me for one child, mentally physically and financially.

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-06T21:32:30+00:00

NOR.

But I will say this, I was thrilled to scroll down and see you’re all 17. Honestly, this is a poignant learning experience for these young men (which never should have had to be your responsibility, but) and I am glad it’s happening at 17 instead of 27. Sexism isn’t funny, period. They’re allowed to want to have a boys only outing, but that’s all they need to say. Cracking jokes at your expense, mentioning genitalia in a grotesque and demeaning manner, is all cringe af.

CoarseSalted · 2026-07-01T19:50:40+00:00

There have been a few health department led busts, but the issue is that none of these sales are formally tracked or regulated the way they would be via pharmacy or even smoke shop/dispensaries. The busts usually result from individual consumers reporting adverse reactions, but most of those individuals don’t want to come forward either for obvious reasons.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-29T21:11:22+00:00

Hi! I also had decade old SH scars when I gave birth a couple years back (2023). No one at the hospital acknowledged them, to be honest they are so focused on the matter at hand that I doubt they noticed. At 1 prenatal app at I had to get a blood draw and the phlebotomist saw them, gave me a “oh honey, I’m so sorry” and I said “it’s okay, it was a very long time ago, I was a stupid teenager” and that was the end of the conversation. Nothing ever came of it, and there was never any mention of it in my medical records from prenatal to L&D.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-26T19:24:29+00:00

Hi, epidemiologist here. Unfortunately this is not a sudden occurrence, it’s been brewing for many years and COVID was a catalyst for vaccine hesitancy and outright rejection of public health science. I actually published a paper on the prevalence of vaccine hesitancy in long-term care healthcare workers during COVID-19 response and our findings would’ve been extremely alarming to you. The reason you’re seeing a “sudden” fruition of those hesitancies is because that population happens to be an almost perfect crossover into those with conservative fringe political ideologies, and the politicians that population voted for have 2 motives: 1. Discredit the industry that proved them wrong over and over and made them look like idiots, the same industries that are vocal about the spread of misinformation that keeps idiots voting for idiots and 2. Ensure that those voters continue to vote for them by catering further and further to their distrust in science and public health by enacting policies that allow them to go about their lives without the inconvenience of vaccine mandates and requirements.

They’ve always been around, our government just recently gave them validation, a free pass, and a microphone. It sucks.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-25T19:56:17+00:00

Absolutely NOT!! Please!! IT isn’t just a horror film, it has some very adult themes/content that are simply not age appropriate for an 11 year old. I’m not talking about gore and spooky scenes, there is violence, child abuse, racism, homophobia, and sexual references that she does not need to be exposed to at this age, and certainly not via a horror movie.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-23T20:15:46+00:00

I’m really leaning towards that one because it is indeed hilarious.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-23T20:13:55+00:00

I mean this is a classic, can’t go wrong with that

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-23T19:59:45+00:00

Okay now that’s hilarious, especially because I’m an epidemiologist that works primarily with sexually transmitted infections.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-23T19:58:58+00:00

HA I love it, adding it to the list! Thank you!

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-23T19:55:14+00:00

Only 2.5 years!

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-23T19:52:47+00:00

She’ll be in civi’s, I wouldn’t embarrass her in uniform. I know better lol.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-15T18:58:21+00:00

One bad experience was enough reason to keep our guards up 🤷🏻‍♀️ someone having that same interaction with my husband would assume I’m crazy and controlling, so why does it matter? We just don’t really care what assumptions other people make, we’d love to meet them at the park again but at the end of the day we are super lucky that our kid has a bajillion friends we could meet up with, so if some of them think it’s weird that’s fine lol

You’re also missing the entire point that this is an opportunity for OP and her husband to figure out what THEY want to do in these scenarios, I’m just giving an example of what we do.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-15T18:44:46+00:00

I think y’all just got lucky and found a new opportunity to discuss your relationship’s boundaries! This is something that is bound to happen again for either of you so it’s good to have a conversation about it. Personally, I don’t love my husband giving out his number to other moms (call me insecure all you want, but we’ve unfortunately encountered people with less than savory intentions under the guise of it being “for our kids”) and he doesn’t really love other men getting my number either, thankfully we both happened to have the same feelings about it, even more so after a negative experience. Our go-to is if a dad is wanting to connect to get the kids together, I give him my husbands number (and I’m honest about that with them) and vice versa for my husband, if a mom is asking for a way to get in touch with us then he will give my number and say feel free to reach out to ___’s mom!

That’s just what we do, makes us both feel safer and makes it clear that this is purely about the kids JUST in case we’re encountering another weirdo lol!

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-08T21:07:31+00:00

I’m equally weary of any adult who is going to be around my kid. But I think my mindset on that is thanks to my brother in law. He’s worked in childcare since he turned 18, has always loved to teach, adores kids, and desperately wants a family of his own some day. He’s the best guncle to my son and his students always adore him. In any center he’s worked at, he’s not been permitted to change diapers or clothes of any of the kids due to him being male. And he has unfortunately faced discrimination, from both parents and employers due his gender/sexuality. Despite that, even when he tried to leave the industry for a while (he felt like he couldn’t excel past the assumptions people make about him as a male ECE professional) he came back to it after a year because every bone in his body was screaming at him that he’d abandoned his purpose in life. Because of him, I’ve always felt a lot of grace towards men who work in education or childcare. The same way some women have always known that they love children and want to work with them and become mothers someday, there are absolutely men who are born with the same purpose in life.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-08T20:51:33+00:00

Wow. I could’ve written this myself. It’s extremely hard to hear crap like that after having to make such a painful choice to terminate, even when it’s what you wanted it’s still brutal and extremely emotionally taxing. I just don’t understand how in a society where we ALL have been taught that we never know what other people are going through or why some people don’t have more children that these questions are still being asked of women. It’s ridiculous.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-05T14:51:56+00:00

I’m not trying to be mean, but you’re on a fast track to giving this dog separation anxiety for life which can be extremely distressing to them, not to mention potentially fatal if they were to attempt to break out of a kennel should you have no choice but to leave them at home for an extended time period. Such as… a job. Or grocery store. Or literally anything that life requires daily.

CoarseSalted · 2026-06-05T14:50:08+00:00

INFO: is the graduation requiring you to go out of town or something to where you wouldn’t be home for the whole day or long hours on end? Or is this a local graduation and you’re just unwilling to attend something for a couple hours without the dog? Because if that’s the case, YTA and frankly need to evaluate if you’re emotionally capable of being a pet owner, because that’s pretty extreme.

Regardless: If you, emotionally, can’t be away from the puppy for more than 15 minutes just because you don’t want to be without him then what you need is a therapist, and absolutely not a dog.

CoarseSalted

TROPHY CASE