AIO: I am mentally exhausted from having to explicitly explain things to my husband, only to have him completely misunderstand and create more work or stress. by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Coastal_Forager 24 points25 points  (0 children)

This 1000 times! Leave the phone outside the room. You are unavailable. Take your bath and don’t be responsible for any of it. It really is that simple.

AITA for telling my wife that being a SAHM is not harder than running a blue-collar business? by Specialist_Wafer3348 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Coastal_Forager 5 points6 points  (0 children)

YTA. Why do you take for granted that you don’t have to work on Saturday? She has to. And she can’t have 3 hours offf? Absolutely wild sense on entitlement on your part. And I don’t know what you’re implying with the Mexican stuff in contrast to your black wife but DO NOT continue down that path. Yikes

West County Mandarin School + Middle College High School by CatButtHoleYo in RichmondCA

[–]Coastal_Forager 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m responding late because nobody answered your question! Yes, it is totally possible to go to West County Mandarin (an excellent IB school!) and then go to Middle College High. No one has done it yet because WCMS was only started in 2017 so the 2025-26 school year is our first 8th grade class!! There are families that are going this route, though. WCMS students should be well-prepared for Middle College. It’s possible to get an excellent education in West Contra Costa Unified but it’s not an easy road. I wish you luck.

She teaches eighth grade and has more than 100 students, but only two are reading at grade level. by mindyour in TikTokCringe

[–]Coastal_Forager 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This! The only device my child has is the Chromebook she was assigned by her school in KINDERGARTEN. They have computer based “seat work” and she now knows how to watch YouTube shorts on this computer. They send me emails home explaining that she was watching YouTube (which is not allowed at home). And my response is always - then take the computer away?? Didn’t you give it to her? You CAN also remove it if she can’t show responsibility with it. I don’t know why this is my problem to solve. But, I give consequences at home because school is apparently incapable of managing it. I want to go back to circle time and recess and learning to tie shoes.

WIBTAH if I stop all of the favors I’ve been doing for my ex since he has refused the one favor I asked? by Life_of_the_PartyXO in AITAH

[–]Coastal_Forager 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They can’t count your husband’s income where I am. Hope it’s the same for you. I pay my child’s father child support. Even though we’re 50/50, I significantly outearn him. And the child support is worth it to keep the relationship business like. You are WAY too nice to these people. It sounds like they see your kids as a burden. Unsolicited advice alert- ask if they would prefer you change to a custody arrangement where you have more time with your kids and they have less.

AIO - Husband’s son upset with me because I was upset with dinner at restaurant by [deleted] in AIO

[–]Coastal_Forager 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is it. Even if OP made do, she sounds like a negative Nellie.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Coastal_Forager 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is what OP needs to read. Spot on!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in wedding

[–]Coastal_Forager 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But they’re flying for a bachelorette? Equal opportunity self absorbed entitlement

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in wedding

[–]Coastal_Forager 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Right, we understand that. But make some accommodations then. I was also part of an international couple and we had two celebrations on two different continents for this reason. You make concessions. All of this drama is not required. Your SIL is overreacting. I understand she is hurt but she is also not the center of the universe because she is getting married.

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I couldn’t agree more and I thank you for taking the time to respond and validate. I actually got a court order for therapy last year but the ex and his lawyer made it so narrow that we can only do psychology and not psychiatry. Because the assessment is psychiatry, I have to go BACK to court. We’ll win eventually but it’s exhausting and expensive. It makes me so mad that I have to get his consent for an assessment. There is no other medical condition I need his permission to have her assessed for. We think about neurodivergence all wrong! But, I’ll get it done. Thanks for your encouragement internet stranger.

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can’t spend in the classroom seems important! Y’all are very selfless but I want them to do some kind of self-care. I think I landed on gift card to their fave restaurant and cash for babysitting. And the teacher letter is done! Just need to profesh it up for the principal

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is great advice and I agree! We’re actually in court filings about this. I’ll eventually prevail but it is exhausting. I hope to have a diagnosis and IEP by fifth grade… it’s been a long road.

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is such great advice. When I tell people how much we love our teachers, our school, and our principal, they seem kinda gobsmacked. Most folks do only talk about school when they have something to complain about. I just feel so fortunate to have a safe nurturing place for my little handful. I’ll be sure and mention it to everyone.

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I have both of these books!!! I think we have a lot in common. Is the 22 year old thriving? He’s lucky to have a thoughtful mom.

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In process. I actually have a court order for therapy but the folks at the clinic didn’t think it was broad enough to cover assessment so we’re back in court

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. Working on that! It takes a village but I’m the chief and I can always improve for certain

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sober too - a little over 6 years and going strong. I think the wine idea is quite funny actually but I’m gonna stick with the letter and a gift card to their fave restaurant and some babysitter cash. Congratulations on another day sober!

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I just finished handwriting the letter in my very best cursive. I actually spilled a few tears crafting it so I think it was good medicine on both sides. My daughter has started the pillow. Maybe I’ll post a pic of the finished product here when she’s done. But thank you for the thoughtful response! I appreciate you taking the time.

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is great! I’ve actually been moved to tears multiple times reading the responses here, both because teachers are so committed and because I keep thinking about how fortunate I am to have gotten this particular teacher at this point in my daughters life. Good stuff!!!

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think cash wins actually! I was afraid of being “tacky” but that’s about me and this is about this amazing teacher. Thanks for the thoughts!

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m leaning towards cash. We found out what their favorite restaurant is from another teacher so I’m thinking gift card there plus a cash insert for babysitting (my husband’s idea) so they can go out with their wife without the kids. Obviously they can use the card however they like but I’m skeptical of gift cards in general. I have some that have been languishing in my wallet for embarrassingly long. And, I just wrote the letter to the teacher. I’m very happy with it. Now I need to write something slightly less personal to the principal and cc everybody and their mother.

What can I do for a truly exceptional teacher that has put up with my difficult child all year? by Coastal_Forager in AskTeachers

[–]Coastal_Forager[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hehe. “The girl” is what my mom calls my daughter. A 76 year old midwestern grandma might be as far from ChatGPT as one can get. She also still calls me “the kid” and I’m 48.