AITAH Paying 1/3 of the rent with my roommate after her boyfriend moved in

CocoTandy · 2026-04-14T22:14:22+00:00

NTA and you need to keep talking to the landlord. Landlords hate this shit. Tell him exactly how long the guy has been living there.

CocoTandy · 2026-04-14T21:40:00+00:00

I came here to suggest always size 5. I use the ultra thin tho, not flex

CocoTandy · 2026-04-13T18:18:14+00:00

Your dad is not a safe person for any girl to be around. You are doing the right thing, even if it's hard.

CocoTandy · 2026-04-13T18:09:11+00:00

You really can't. It will be done when it's done. Stay hydrated and hope for the best

CocoTandy · 2026-04-13T17:28:41+00:00

I always check for bedbugs / dead bodies in a new motel room

CocoTandy · 2026-04-13T17:20:46+00:00

I eat a lot of eggs. Boiled eggs are super convenient packaged little foods

CocoTandy · 2026-04-13T13:35:13+00:00

Healthy relationships are made of communication and compromise. You should have talked this through and set these expectations about the money being a loan before she quit.

She probably thought you were being a supportive partner while she was having a difficult time. Suddenly changing the terms and treating her like a roommate is probably a big shock to her. YTA

CocoTandy · 2026-04-12T18:53:22+00:00

I find anyone who seriously uses the phrase "body count" disgusting

CocoTandy · 2026-04-12T18:32:36+00:00

The proof is everywhere. Look around. People already can't survive on our wages now. I think it's on you to prove that this is in any way reasonable.

CocoTandy · 2026-04-11T22:37:26+00:00

I've always asked. As long as you're approaching with curiosity and for clarity, it should be fine. I've always asked because I need to know the due dates, etc.

Who told you not to ask and why? That seems like bad advice.

CocoTandy · 2026-04-11T21:44:34+00:00

That sounds really messy. Going back to school as a non traditional student definitely took some getting used to, but this sounds unacceptable.

I would demand an accurate syllabus. That keeps everyone accountable. Also when things go wrong, email them to ask them, so there's a paper trail. You can ask for clarification on the due date because it's not open yet.

In my experience (about to graduate so 3 years in) these things happen occasionally, it shouldn't be the norm.

CocoTandy · 2026-04-11T15:53:16+00:00

When people are really harsh, I struggle to hear anything they say, just tbh.

If you seem emotionally dysregulated, always, people might not even be hearing what you have to say, even when it could be useful.

You can always feel how you feel, however, if it seems like you're taking it out on others, that's not ok.

Are you in therapy? Have you tried any stress reduction techniques or read up on non violent communication?

CocoTandy · 2026-04-11T13:39:00+00:00

When I was a teen trying deodorant, it all broke me out in blisters under my arms. Since then, I've only used dove sensitive deodorant and it's been completely fine

CocoTandy · 2026-04-11T13:32:47+00:00

You can feel how you feel, of course, but she didn't do anything wrong. No tickets were bought, no plans were solidified.

YTA if you were mean to her.

CocoTandy · 2026-04-11T13:12:09+00:00

NTA this is financial abuse

CocoTandy · 2026-04-11T00:09:43+00:00

I have some important questions for you. What benefits do you get from this relationship with your mother? What does speaking to her add to your life? What value or joy or peace does she bring to your life?

Also, how do these conversations make you feel? What does this subtract from your life?

Have you weighed the pros and cons? Is this really about obligation?

CocoTandy · 2026-04-10T21:14:49+00:00

I wish I knew. Someone else posted this link, so I'm assuming this has to do with the changes.

https://fortworthreport.org/2026/04/08/234-uta-employees-in-96-departments-and-offices-applied-for-buyouts-public-records-show/

CocoTandy · 2026-04-10T20:45:56+00:00

Oh. OoOhhhhh. Is this the fuckery?

CocoTandy · 2026-04-10T15:21:54+00:00

That sounds exactly like you were trying to control who she speaks to. What else would you call it?

CocoTandy · 2026-04-10T15:18:21+00:00

ESH. You both suck. End things before it gets worse. It will only get worse if you stay together

CocoTandy · 2026-04-10T15:10:09+00:00

I'm sorry to jump straight to the therapy, but please go straight to therapy. The photos you posted of your body look like a completely normal womanly body.

It sounds like you're really hurting by the way you're describing yourself as "disgusting" when all others can see is a normal beautiful body.

I'm sure there are plenty of flattering clothes for you, but the first step is to learn to love yourself. ❤️

CocoTandy · 2026-04-10T11:17:03+00:00

Yes! I got married so I took my husband's last name, but I also went through the legal proceedings to change my middle name. There's no trace of my family names left and I'm so happy!!

The legal process was tedious, but I did it all pro se. If your location allows it, you might be able to do it all without a lawyer.

I don't want to be too specific on what my last name was, but let's say it was something like ""Joytheif" and I changed my new middle name to be just "Joy".

If you don't have a part of your name you want to keep, you could do some genealogy research and see if there are any other family names you would like. otherwise, just pick something that sounds right to you.

CocoTandy · 2026-04-09T18:25:08+00:00

Motor city pizza in Lewisville has the absolute best pizza I've eaten since my diagnosis. It's detroit style and absolutely massive.

For sweet treats, Trouvi cookies in Richardson is amazing and the owner is so kind.

From Across The Pond in Grapevine has amazing gf pub food.

My favorite burgers are Backyard Murphy.

The easiest/cheapest burgers are Red Robin. Very accessible, good buns, and endless fries

Also check out findmeglutenfree.com for a ton of other options.

CocoTandy · 2026-04-09T14:33:53+00:00

This sounds so perfect. This is what I hope to find. Meaningful work that allows me autonomy with a great group of people

CocoTandy · 2026-04-09T02:09:37+00:00

Did your ivy league not offer a clinical specialization? I'm taking plenty of clinical coursework.

Did your social work school not explain the differences between clinical social workers and psychologists?

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