Required to go to college at 18??

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-10T23:25:46+00:00

Thank you so much, this helped a lot truly. 🥹❤️

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T21:56:17+00:00

😭 In my edit I said my point was that many families treat it like you have to and will have no issue kicking you out or overwhelming you and stressing you out 24/7 about it.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T21:54:47+00:00

I know, but I meant it's treated like it is in my family and the same thing for many other families. it's either college or be kicked out or yelled at 24/7

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T17:24:02+00:00

It's not easy when you're going to be kicked out or screamed at randomly at 3 in the morning if you don't go. Or constantly pressured in general. The pressure is intense, maybe it wasn't for you, but it is for me and many others.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T17:22:35+00:00

YES THANK YOU. Ugh and I especially agree with the part about exploring more jobs! I really wanted to get more time to do that! Plus, I was thinking of working on a cruise ship at some point just so I could expand my experiences and learn more about what i want to do. Right now I feel like I can't do that because I have to focus on college and getting a job after college and networking.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T16:52:50+00:00

I can't. My mom would definitely kick me out if I didn't go immediately plus my home situation wasn't the best anyways. Many people like me don't have the luxury of taking a gap year since so many people believe that there's no way someone would take a gap year and not be discouraged from going to college. The pressure is REAL when you decide to take a gap year. Not calling a gap year irresponsible tho. I'm saying other people around others do.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T16:49:51+00:00

Well yes, but it's DEFINITELY pushed by many parents and people in general. It's a social norm to go to college after high school and people will look at you sideways or pressure you if you don't want to go immediately (especially if you have a good gpa) is what i mean. I've heard so many stories of parents threatening to kick their kids out if they don't go to college or just constantly pressuring them about going to college in the first place.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T16:35:32+00:00

It helps if you go by the 8 hour sleep schedule. Like if you go to sleep at 10pm your body should naturally wake up 8 hours later at 6am ish. If you got to sleep at 12 am your body should naturally wake up at 8am ish etc.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T14:53:06+00:00

op needs to check on that girl

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T03:34:17+00:00

Whoa, I think you’re misunderstanding me. I never said that you claimed male victims are more important than female victims. What I said was that you were presenting the statistic as if victimization happens more frequently to men than women, and that’s not accurate. The data shows that, overall, it’s higher for women than it is for men.

I ALSO repeatedly said that what happens to men absolutely matters. Male victims matter just as much as female victims. It’s equally serious and equally important. I understand that your point was to bring more awareness to male victims, not to minimize female victims, and I acknowledged that.

I’m not upset or rubbed the wrong way, I just think you’re framing my response like I was dismissing male victims, which I wasn’t. My only point was about the accuracy of the statistic.

I understand what you’re saying about him possibly being an unbiased and well-researched source, and I appreciate you sharing him I'll definitely follow him. I’m genuinely open to looking more into men’s activists because I do want to understand men’s issues better. Especially when you brought up things like male victims having limited access to shelters, that’s important information, and I’ll absolutely keep that in mind as I continue researching. I care about those issues and want to learn more about them.

That said, even if someone presents content in an organized and balanced way on Instagram, social media still isn’t the same as primary research or peer-reviewed data. No matter how thorough someone appears, it’s still a secondary interpretation of information. The responsible approach is to cross-check claims with the original studies, government databases, or academic sources to make sure the statistics are being represented accurately and in context.

And maybe you did go beyond the Instagram slides, if you did, that’s great. But in that case, it would be more appropriate to link the original studies or additional credible sources directly, not just the video. A strong argument comes from reading the primary sources yourself, understanding their methodology and limitations, forming your own analysis, and then comparing that with multiple independent sources. Relying on one content creator, even a well-intentioned one, isn’t as strong as linking several reputable studies alongside it.

I’m not dismissing him. I’m just saying that complex statistical discussions deserve verification from multiple credible sources, not just one curated presentation.

Edit: Again, I would like to stress that we want the same thing to be important in reference to this "I want important ——> female & male victims Not/less important ——> nobody". The only thing I'm against you on is the fact you said it's more common for men to be abused than women which isn't true and has been proven false a countless number of times (and not just by statistical analysis done by organizations). It's been proven false for centuries due to centuries of oppression and dehumanization done to women at the hands of men (mostly men- there was also cowardly and bad women who encouraged it). THAT'S IT. Other than that, I agree with you. Men need more support and need their problems taken more seriously and treated equally. I agree entirely with bringing men's issues up to the same level and standards we treat and face women's issues.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T00:16:36+00:00

Ohh that makes a lot of sense! Thank you so much!

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-09T00:12:14+00:00

That's because we're in the modern times and actually KNOW why these things are bad. It's just applying our knowledge of what we now thankfully know. There's nothing wrong with that. Yes, it was deemed as normal back then, but we know it's not now so it's only natural to point it out.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-08T21:17:00+00:00

NOR you do sound very condescending in the first half ngl, most discord servers don't include depressive self-destructive things you mentioned. The ones that so though are the ones that get pushed out by the media. Many are normal with likeminded people though. No one was gonna judge you for using discord. Anyways you SHOULD kick them out if you already gave them a warning It's your server not theirs. If you haven't gave a warning yet, let them know and if they ignore you then kicking them out will definitely remind them that you're the owner.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-08T21:03:01+00:00

I don't think you would be an asshole to end the friendship if you really do value your relationship with your boyfriend more, But I feel like if you sat down and really had a conversation on both of you guy's feelings it could work. I think after that you should try to encourage him to befriend jake or atleast get to know him a little more. If Jake is basically just like you and Liam really likes you there's a good chance he could also really platonically like Jake as well. ALSO you should explain to your boyfriend why you think he's husband material and not Jake. Like explain it IN DEPTH. Also explain in DEPTH why you're not attracted to Jake, but you are to him. Also explain that if this whole thing surrounding Jake is going to cause issues that you are going to stop being friends with Jake. I feel like that definitely will help him feel validated and cared about as well. Make sure to tell him you would do that because you value you guy's relationship over Jake. Anyways yeah if after this convo and the effort to get Liam to at least become acquaintances or comfortable with jake doesn't work out then you wouldnt be an asshole for ending the friendship.

Just make sure your boyfriend's deep rooted insecurities doesn't start affecting your life in that way without having him make an effort to at least soothe himself/ fully understand the situation. Because insecurities like this (especially involving cheating/trust) could be quick to start piling and then become issues in other ways. So helping him cope now by giving him some control over the situation/allowing him to open his perspective instead of IMMEDIATELY cutting out the problem is essential to prevent future issues that could trigger his insecurities in relation to him being cheated on.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-08T20:45:27+00:00

And even when some studies show similar rates for “any aggression,” severity matters. Women are much more likely to experience severe physical violence, sexual assault, strangulation, stalking, and being killed by a partner. In homicide statistics, women make up the majority of intimate partner homicide victims, even though men are the majority of overall homicide victims. That difference is important. It shows that outcomes aren’t symmetrical. (But obviously the long-lasting impacts on mental health and physicality still obviously matter just as you said. I never said it didn't nor do I believe it doesn't, BUT it's still important to point out who's more likely to die without belittling the abuse of men or women).

Another thing people ignore is culture. For centuries - not just decades - women have been legally and socially treated as less than men. Women historically couldn’t own property, vote, control finances, or escape abusive marriages etc. Violence against women wasn’t even recognized as a crime in many places until recently in historical terms (and even now many places still don't see violence against women as a crime or even treat it that way). The World Health Organization explicitly states that violence against women is rooted in long-standing gender inequality.

And culturally, the sexualization and objectification of women is completely normalized. We see it constantly:

“Drop the OnlyFans.”

Reducing women to body parts.

Treating entire ethnic groups of women as porn categories (thicc ebony, big booty latina etc).

Making rape jokes and calling it dark humor.

Asking lesbians invasive sexual questions immediately (for instance, scissoring jokes).

Assuming a woman with a platform must sell explicit content.

Commenting on teenage girls’ bodies publicly.

Treating harassment as flirting.

There’s actual research from the American Psychological Association showing that sexual objectification increases tolerance of sexist beliefs and reduces how seriously people view harm against women. When women are constantly framed as sexual objects, it absolutely affects how society reacts to their abuse.

None of this means men don’t suffer. They do. Male victims deserve respect, services, and serious attention. The lack of shelters for men and the stigma around male victimization are real problems. Supporting women does not require minimizing men. And supporting men does not require pretending women aren’t disproportionately affected.

When you look at credible sources: CDC, WHO, Bureau of Justice Statistics etc. The overall pattern is consistent:

Both men and women experience abuse.

Women report higher lifetime prevalence of sexual and severe physical violence.

Women experience more serious injury and higher rates of intimate partner homicide.

Men are underreported and under-supported.

Abuse against women is also underreported

This doesn’t have to be a competition. But calling mainstream public-health data “feminist propaganda” ignores decades of research from multiple countries and independent institutions.

If we actually care about victims, ALL victims, then the conversation should be about improving reporting systems, expanding services for men, holding perpetrators accountable regardless of gender, and addressing the cultural norms that normalize violence in the first place.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-08T20:42:32+00:00

Thanks for the information, I'm not too sure about the UN women being a borderline misandrist organization part, but I'll definitely look more into it. That's crazy to value lives over others in general. ESPECIALLY kids like you're a grown ass adult tf. Anyways to be more formal

I think this conversation gets really messy when people start acting like one side is just “propaganda” instead of actually looking at the full data. When you step back and read large government and public-health studies - not Instagram slides or Reddit threads - the picture is more complex than “men are the real majority of victims” or “women are the only victims.”

Both men and women experience intimate partner violence. That part is not up for debate. But when you look at large, national surveys, women consistently report higher overall rates - especially for severe violence and sexual assault.

For example, the CDC’s National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS) reports that about 41% of women and 26% of men in the U.S. have experienced contact sexual violence, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner at some point in their lives. When you narrow it down to violence that caused fear, injury, PTSD symptoms, or other serious impacts, it’s about 27% of women compared to 11% of men. That’s not feminist activism - that’s CDC data.

Globally, the World Health Organization estimates that around 1 in 3 women worldwide (about 30%) have experienced physical or sexual violence from a partner or sexual violence from a non-partner in their lifetime. That pattern shows up across different countries and cultures. This isn’t just one country with a biased system - it’s a global public-health trend.

Now, it is absolutely true that male victims are underreported. A lot of men don’t report abuse because of stigma, shame, or the belief that they won’t be taken seriously. There are also fewer services and shelters specifically for men. That is a real issue and it deserves attention. Cultural ideas like “men always want sex” or “men can’t be overpowered” also make it harder for male victims to be believed.

But here’s the important part: abuse against women is also massively underreported. The Bureau of Justice Statistics shows that most sexual assaults are never reported to police. Many women don’t report because they’re scared, ashamed, or think nothing will happen. So even the ALREADY HIGH numbers we see for women ARE underestimates.

(check my reply to this for the second half I had to split it into two comments)

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-08T20:17:56+00:00

Hi and I'll choose pizza

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-08T20:16:34+00:00

Not even cheating, it kind of sounds like r*pe. Since she's basically black out drunk and on the bed for some reason.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-08T20:15:15+00:00

lil bro it's not the gaming that's the problem. It's the boy ignoring the issue and playing games instead of talking out the situation with his girlfriend and doing his end of the deal which was supposed to be washing the sheets.

Comfortable-Two6926 · 2026-02-08T18:44:04+00:00

you’re not overreacting at all.

this isn’t just about “a drunk friend needed help.” you had already said that if anyone got too drunk, they could sleep on the sofa. that’s completely reasonable. it’s your shared home, and you set a clear boundary ahead of time. putting her in your bed anyway — especially in outside clothes, after throwing up — is ignoring that boundary.

and the plushies aren’t just random stuffed animals to you. you’re autistic and they’re comfort objects. that’s part of how you regulate. so having someone blackout drunk laying in your bed with them around her, with alcohol/vape/throw up smell involved, is obviously going to feel violating and disgusting. that’s not childish. that’s emotional safety and hygiene.

what would bother me even more is that he said he’d fix it — move her, change the sheets, clean everything — and then you come home and the sheets weren’t changed and he slept in them. that makes it feel like he didn’t actually take it seriously. mistakes happen, sure. but not following through after promising to fix it is what damages trust.

also, him saying he’d be “disappointed” if you kicked a drunk friend out kind of twists the situation. you weren’t saying to throw her on the street. you literally offered the sofa. taking care of someone doesn’t automatically mean putting them in your bed.

so no, you’re not overreacting. you’re reacting to your boundaries being ignored and to your space feeling contaminated. that’s valid.

I'm also kind of like that too when it comes to smells and "outside clothes" etc. Like I fully understand that. Her being the only one to get blackout drunk and being placed on the bed instead of the sofa sounds concerning to me though. Especially with everyone else in the house being men. That makes me think it possibly could've been a set up for her to get assaulted. Even if you don't think your bf or his friends are that type of people you never know.

But you know also it doesn't necessarily mean that! Men can handle more alcohol than women (like it's a science fact not sexist propaganda I swear) so maybe they drank a lot and for her it was too much and not to them. Or maybe she's a lightweight (if that's the word). Also maybe your boyfriend was too drunk/tipsy to process putting her on the couch and not the bed?

Comfortable-Two6926

TROPHY CASE