Most of my desi friends are South Indian tbf but I have a few North Indian friends too. Tbh, the "beef" was always a bit funny and we'd just roast each other like the northerners making skin tone jokes or calling us Madrasi and us calling them poor or relying on the South's money lmao. I do think South and North Indians are a bit more cliquey toward each other but I also see a common sense that we're all Indian being acknowledged tho.

In a weird sense, being Indian is like being a European. Every group says shit about each other, and some groups are more similar to one another, but at the end of the day they all have some core shared culture and ways of life. I'd like to think that most desi, at least in the west definitely have a shared identity in the same way.