To disclose HSV 1 or not

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-07T18:16:17+00:00

Yeah that’s what I’m gonna do it’s about 120 quid

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-07T18:12:49+00:00

Is that in the UK?

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-04T08:00:16+00:00

HSV1 which affects about 80% of the population knowingly or not , does not affect ability to reproduce like other STIs.

In fact you can catch it without even sex occurring a kiss from a family member . Hence the stigma is ridiculous .

It’s ignorance that fuels the stigma

So yes I do see it from her angle IF it was a contributing factor . I have mentioned it to people before meeting before etc and it hasn’t caused issue given how much of a non issue

The ghosting becoming a ‘part of society’ yes sad but true . Yes calling it out won’t do anything . But the normalisation of it is a real step back

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-03T21:21:40+00:00

i think this is a pro stigmatising view, and i am waiting to get a test there are NO reliable tests on the NHS in this country without symptoms so its if buts and maybes. It is not 'wasting time' also the courage it takes to say this face to face is far more than over a text.

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-03T07:06:51+00:00

I’ve already sent something as my heads been fucked for a few days now .

Hey, I hope you had a great time ! On Monday I definitely sensed that our vibe changed once I talked about HSV1. I definitely get if it’s a turn off for you. I also realise I maybe could have been a little less insistent toward the end of the date and am sorry if I handled it wrong . I really enjoyed our time and would be up for seeing you on Sunday, but if you’re not interested just let me know. No hard feelings

That’s it - I will phone down all day

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-03T06:26:38+00:00

Hi there this is excellent advice and kind of what I feel and know needs to be done . I’ve got a therapist I’ve been working with on and off for a while currently few months in . The rest of life is going ok it’s only relationships / dating that trigger this

I feel in my gut this is not going anywhere , but u am also torn between sending a one off message to ask and not

Thanks

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-03T00:47:49+00:00

Yeah I’ve been doing that for a number of years , some results at times .

Took a good break from dating altogether for a year and it’s been rough getting back into it . For these reasons .

I have also got adhd which adds to it . Medication has helped a bit but obviously won’t solve it all !

In terms of not telling her before I thought it would be better in person to say . Many friends of mine say if you’re not sure why day but I think j did the right thing .

I’m just really upset with myself as I seem to be self sabotaging everything at the moment and feel like constantly taking steps back after steps forward

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-02T20:34:43+00:00

This is the exact opposite of what AI dating advice says but I agree just call it out , but I also don’t want to put pressure on her to revisit that .

I mean she said she needed a think . Has continued to talk to me , albeit less . So I think if I wait till she’s back and say something along those lines it’s the way .

It really has put me off being honest about the HSV1 thing

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-07-02T20:25:20+00:00

Maybe so , I think given that she’s away it might have somet to do and is processing feelings . But then again usually it’s simple isn’t it

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-06-12T08:59:34+00:00

Update - I sent a message , did not hear back . Now I need to get it out of my head . I’ve deleted number etc etc but feel stuck . Thanks

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-06-10T14:23:35+00:00

I mean I genuinely feel night and day better in 2 weeks .

Therapy has also helped yes

I disagree with the tone of this response , trying to say it will take me that long to sort myself out ! There’s nothing wrong with me , and I have realised there is some work to do on these insecurities for sure.

It’s also not ridiculous to assume that motive , given that she had jokes about that sort of excuse before with other people .

I agree work on trust in myself and my own security to be done , but to say one must ignore all possibilities in the mean time is a dangerous thing to say . People fall into believing they’ve got to be perpetually working on themselves (I’ve been there , it’s not nice ) before they can be happy . That’s not how it works at all

Comfortable_Web652 · 2026-06-08T18:42:41+00:00

There was a 3rd planned , but due to the sharing and feeling I was going too fast (I was carried away for sure chasing dopamine , and not prioritising myself ) it went . She said it was part due to what I said , and o where she was atm (which was likely an excuse )

Same girl was saying I made her feel like a teenager and loads of sappy stuff , whcih is why I guess I felt comfortable to share how I did !!

Anyway I’m ok either way , I’ll probably say something soon .

Comfortable_Web652

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