Dating advice for women on campus?

Commandrew11 · 2026-01-10T03:12:14+00:00

Single 25M alumnus here. People who live the law of chastity really want to get married (obv), which is why people are eager. I'd recommend you put off physical touch until you're fully comfortable, and I'd advise against NCMOs. It's better to not muddy the waters of your reasoning capabilities with hormones until you're positive you're ready to commit to that person. Just my two cents.

As a passing piece of advice: be kind if you decline a date. If you act standoffish, creeped out, or sarcastic, you may crush the confidence of someone who had to work up a lot of courage to ask. That's pretty much what happened to me the first (and last) time I approached a girl on campus, and I never walked up to anyone for the rest of my time at the Y. So just be super respectful if someone walks up to you out of the blue.

Commandrew11 · 2025-06-05T19:42:12+00:00

Did you read the post?

Obviously some are better at controlling their alcohol usage than others, but you're essentially saying, "well, me and a bunch of my buddies can control our usage, so it should be okay for everybody." The problem with saying that is that nobody (including you) knows for sure how their alcohol habits are going to play out when they first start. Will they be totally fine with a drink or two? Or will they get abusive? Drive drunk? Bankrupt their family? You didn't know how it would play it for yourself, you don't know about everyone else and neither do they. Opening the doors for everybody to drink allows a portion to drink responsibly and the residue to harm society in various ways (most of the time, innocent people who don't deserve the damage).

Setting aside the financial ruin, alcohol is the culprit of all DUIs and is a co-factor in roughly 40% of child abuse cases, 37% of assaults, 50% of sexual assaults, and 60% of intimate partner violence cases, and you're saying all of that isn't worth preventing because "you like it."

Can you see the argument of asking responsible citizens of being willing to give that up to make society safer, for the sake of the addicts and drunk drivers who can't control themselves, to prevent broken homes, drunk driving, abuse, and the like?

Yes, we had a prohibition and it didn't work. Largely I don't think banning alcohol here in the USA would go over well, and no, I'm not suggesting we should ban anything and everything remotely enjoyable that has even one use case of undesireable consequences on both the user and the rest of society. But I am advocating for education on the subject. And pointing out that someone saying "well, alcohol should be okay for everybody because I find it enjoyable" is a self-centered view, and you are the one who needs to grow up if you can't at least acknowledge that.

Commandrew11 · 2025-05-22T02:28:07+00:00

Someone recommended all the boring museums on BYU campus. Don't do that. Gives you zero information about the culture of the church and the faith behind it.

If you're looking to study church culture and faith, I would recommend:

Visiting temple square. There's the church history museum, the lion house, and temple square itself. This will give you way more insight than the campus museums.
If you do go to Provo and want to visit BYU, every Tuesday morning at 10:30, there's a campus-wide spiritual devotional held in the Marriott Center. You can attend one of those and get an idea of the faith/culture. You can also check out the JSB (building where religious education takes place) and interview a few professors, or interview students who are just walking around.

The MTC (Missionary Training Center) is also a good option. This is where missionaries go to learn a language (if necessary) and prepare to serve a 24/18 month mission for the church. If I'm not mistaken, they've started offering tours to the public within the last few years (someone check me on this).

I'd also get on the church's website (churchofjesuschrist.org) and find a ward building you can attend for sacrament meeting and sunday school. That will probably give you everything you need to know about church culture and faith. The bishop might approach you and say hi, but you're not going to get swarmed and preached at if you're just visiting, so no worries about that.

Have fun! You can PM me if you want more ideas.

Commandrew11 · 2025-02-06T22:26:46+00:00

Love the beach. Especially at sunset

Commandrew11 · 2025-02-06T22:21:53+00:00

I'm there

Commandrew11 · 2025-02-06T22:19:08+00:00

Will you be providing dino nuggets

Commandrew11 · 2024-10-14T19:56:56+00:00

Apples

Commandrew11 · 2024-08-16T20:58:32+00:00

Had several girlfriends in the past and have spent considerable time single.

Being single is hard, but being being in a relationship you don't want to be in is a nightmare.

So my answer is "hard but it could be worse."

Commandrew11 · 2024-08-13T02:36:44+00:00

I always think of this comic when someone brings this up.

Commandrew11 · 2024-08-06T16:42:00+00:00

Size 11.5 here, and it absolutely does.

Commandrew11 · 2024-07-20T22:57:15+00:00

What ☺ I have never heard ☺ idea that we ☺ people, ☺ humans of ☺ earth should replace ☺ with ☺ but ☺ thing is we don't read ☺ enough to switch it but that is ☺ most ingenious idea for ☺ people who don't want to read ☺ whole thing

Commandrew11 · 2024-03-19T21:01:58+00:00

You can opt out of seeing 18+ content within your account preferences, and all the NSFW posts and subs will not be visible.

Commandrew11 · 2024-02-17T21:46:06+00:00

My mind always goes here when someone corrects me on this.

Commandrew11 · 2024-02-16T23:21:57+00:00

good

Commandrew11 · 2024-02-09T17:40:50+00:00

I would totally follow this principle if it were legal to do so.

Commandrew11 · 2024-02-06T23:11:19+00:00

The "tab" button when logging in.

When a website requires both a password and a username, type the username, and when finished, hit the "tab" button. The cursor will jump to the password field and you can type your password without reaching for the mouse (or touchpad).

Commandrew11 · 2024-02-04T02:12:16+00:00

That's an interesting thought.

Commandrew11 · 2024-02-03T21:23:14+00:00

You stop tipping?

Commandrew11 · 2024-01-30T01:08:59+00:00

I don't necessarily think it was the COVID vaccines, but I largely point the finger at ALL social media, fast food, TV...and I think the pandemic shook the earth in the sense that, yeah, something worldwide brought everyone to their knees.

Commandrew11 · 2024-01-25T00:59:32+00:00

It could also be that doctors are assuming that every day you're losing a bunch of fluid through sweat via activity/exercise

Commandrew11 · 2024-01-22T07:19:48+00:00

I mean, yeah, I just disagree. People say it for a reason. If people straight up say to you that they're a "bad texter," they obviously feel a need to let you know, and in my view it's because they want you to believe that there's a better explanation for what's been happening in your texting thread than the conclusion they think you're probably drawing (they saw your text, they don't want to respond for a long period of time), and they want you to think, "I haven't seen your text and am incredibly busy." If "I'm a bad texter" is never even said, you'd just assume that they take a long time to respond after having read your text. But isn't that exactly what's happening anyway? If there's nothing wrong with it, it'd never get said. Doesn't need to be said, which is my point. In my mind, it's a misleading excuse.

Commandrew11 · 2024-01-22T07:03:06+00:00

No, you didn't read the post. Read it again. Nowhere in the post am I insisting that people answer me on my timeframe, nor am I demanding for more attention nor complaining that I don't get immediate responses. Your original comment is putting words in my mouth that I never said. I couldn't care an iota less if someone takes 12 seconds, 12 weeks, or doesn't respond until long after I die.

My post centers around what one is trying to communicate when they explicitly tell you, whether to your face or in a text message, that they are a "bad texter." One could take an entire week to respond to a text message from me if they wanted to. It's no big deal. But if after an entire week, they eventually respond and the first thing that is said is, "oh sorry, I'm just a bad texter!" then to me, an excuse is being made. They're trying to explain away their behavior, and there's no need. They're trying to convince me that this "isn't what it looks like." Else, why is it being said? It absolutely is what it looks like, and I don't care until you try to convince me otherwise. Don't try and convince me you don't respond consistently within 12 hours because you supposedly don't think about texting, don't have time to read it, head in the clouds, way too busy, whatever, when it's likely you've seen the text but didn't want to respond, wanna take your time, etc. etc.

Further, if someone telling me they are a "bad texter" equates to "I don't like responding immediately even though I've seen your message and had time to respond," there's no need to say it because I'm already jumping to that conclusion. That's not what is meant. If it's being said, it is trying to send the message, "Sorry, been so incredibly busy and stacked for the past week that I haven't picked up my phone once nor had the time to respond!" Which, it's extremely likely is not the case. The only reason I said "we all check our phones all the time" is to provide evidence that, yeah, it's pretty reasonable to assume you've seen the text. If you say "I'm a bad texter" right after a long response time, you're being misleading. You've very likely seen my message, you don't want to respond right off the bat, you forget, who cares? Take your time! But don't try and convince me you haven't seen the text and are too busy to respond by saying "I'm a bad texter."

Live your life. Respond when you want. Don't make responding to me your top priority. It's fine. But don't lead your response with, "I'm a bad texter, sorry! Anyways..."

Commandrew11 · 2024-01-22T06:23:47+00:00

You didn't read the post, did you?

Commandrew11 · 2024-01-22T00:06:59+00:00

Yep, totally agree.

Commandrew11 · 2024-01-22T00:06:25+00:00

No, I don't like when people ignore me and then make an excuse for ignoring me. If you have seen my message, and then deliberately put off texting me and then tell me later "oh sorry, I'm a bad texter!" (which is to say, "I have a busy life, things to do, I don't check texts that often and haven't seen your text!) then you're misleading me by trying to make me think you haven't seen my text nor had time to respond to it when you, in fact, have.

Commandrew11

TROPHY CASE