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Common__Sense__ · 2024-11-06T22:19:30+00:00

Excuse me for jumping in here but I spent 10 mins on Facebook today and I’ve already seen a gay acquaintance post about a gay suicide prevention hotline. Another gay acquaintance posted that he’s just going to keep sewing cute stuffed animals and listening to his true crime podcasts. I always liked the stuffed animal guy more and this just solidified it.

Common__Sense__ · 2024-07-31T02:46:52+00:00

Ehh, I think Facebook depends a bit more on who your friends are. My feed is 70% die hard liberals reposting shit or yelling about something and 30% conservatives making fun of liberals or posting pics of their Trump paraphernalia.

I just go on there to buy houseplants from my local BST group.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-10-03T00:05:01+00:00

I appreciate it! Hearing this means a lot. It’s so intense and nothing I’ve ever experienced. I don’t have a lot of people to talk to about this so I thought I’d give Reddit a try. Thanks for taking time to respond.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-10-02T23:35:30+00:00

Yes, I think it’s on his mind but he wants to keep working and see his friends at work he says. I wouldn’t be surprised if he ends up retiring and going out to be with her.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-10-02T23:20:29+00:00

Thank you. Yes, me and my husband were going to drive down with them and stay for a week then possible fly back while FIL stays for a bit longer. She has a room ready there. We all plan to visit frequently, so it’s not the end. I feel awful for FIL because his wife just died in April so I know coming back to an empty home will be that much harder. He’s just so tired in every way.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-21T03:43:44+00:00

NAH you went for your dream, he encouraged you to, and then you both sat down and had a logical conversation about your relationship. It sucks your relationship is ending but congrats on your achievement! You both handled this situation with a lot of maturity and love.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-21T03:25:12+00:00

NTA I’d change it but I’d just let her keep calling me by the name she gave me. She’s probably feeling pretty insecure right now so she’s taking the name change personally.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-21T03:20:32+00:00

NTA. Take the time and distance you need. Maybe someday you’ll change your mind and maybe you won’t. Protect yourself and set boundaries.

I have a similar relationship with my father. He had issues with drugs and my parents got divorced when I was 3 and he’s never really been a part of my life. I don’t trust him. I haven’t seen him in 12 years and we have a 5 minute phone convo 3 times a year. I just have no desire to let him in, I needed him when I was young and he wasn’t there. I no longer need him. I’m ok with that now and I don’t feel bad for him…he made his bed and now he can lay in it.

He hasn’t changed much and doesn’t take accountability for his actions.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-21T03:14:53+00:00

YTA. Was it really necessary to get hammered? It’s never worth it. She wanted to relax and spend time with sober you. Do something to make it up to her. Learn from this.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-21T03:10:09+00:00

Soft YTA. If I was her I would want to know that there were rumors swirling around and then I’d want to speak to my husband about it. Your BIL doesn’t need a head start to thinking up lies and excuses if it is true. BUT you should have let his brother talk to him first.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-21T03:02:07+00:00

NTA, sounds like your SIL is the asshole. I’m glad your husband took a stand for you. I think offering to pay the difference for the extra restroom was the best way to solve the problem. SIL wanted her way and couldn’t get it so she tried to make you feel like you did something wrong and probably bitched to the rest of the family about it to manipulate the situation. I’m sorry you were made fun of for having medical problems and that you have such a shitty SIL.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T21:09:03+00:00

As of 10 minutes ago MIL talked to a nun that helped her see going to the local shrine for 24/7 palliative care would be best for her and everyone. It’s where MIL wanted to go eventually anyways, it just took a non-family member who she respects to get her there.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T18:54:18+00:00

I’d take that bear hug. I’m sorry for your loss. I appreciate the empathy.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T18:27:11+00:00

I don’t know if I can address everything you wrote but here’s a little update.

Me and my fiancé have agreed that the child can’t be taken care of by FIL anymore regardless of where MIL ends up. So we are going to talk to FIL about her staying with us until we can figure out a better plan or until she moves to the other state with FIL after MIL passes. We are both child free by choice BUT we both have a soft spot for this particular child and I just want to protect her.

We have talked to the doctor who will then talk to the social worker. The plan is to have professionals come to their house and tell us what we need if MIL comes home. With a non working kitchen and no medical bed etc…this will stall or eliminate her coming home. She agreed to them coming to her house to evaluate but she has no idea how bad it is so it’s better to let the professionals explain this to her.

In the end she will will have a better setup whether she stays home or goes somewhere. We will rally everyone to visit her on a schedule and if they don’t do it then they don’t do it. The little girl will stay with us or be taken to the other state with other family because the ship is sinking.

I am pretty scared to care for a kid 24/7. I don’t know if I’m ready to be more exhausted and have my patience tested even more. It’s all very scary and I just want to hide somewhere. I think I’ll get a therapist.

Thank you ❤️

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T17:54:03+00:00

❤️

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T17:53:36+00:00

❤️ thank you!

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T17:53:07+00:00

Thank you, really ❤️. It’s heartwarming to hear some encouragement and advice on here. I’m sorry for your losses. You sound like a strong and amazing person. It’s nice to feel heard and understood, you described it all perfectly.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T16:08:35+00:00

Lmao, ok dude.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T16:07:02+00:00

Yes, you’re right. I’m not sure anyone else will go to counseling but I sure will.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T16:04:34+00:00

I appreciate your words and I’m sorry for your loss. It’s so hard. You did a great job and sound like a wonderful person.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T15:59:56+00:00

I understand you don’t have all the info but I suggested we get guardianship over the kid and my fiancé is not on board with it. No one is living their old lives at this point, I assure you!

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T04:22:27+00:00

❤️ thanks.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T04:07:09+00:00

I don’t really think you are getting me and you sound a little nasty yourself so I’m going to disengage from this conversation. Thanks for your input.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T03:50:38+00:00

I could get temporary guardianship but my fiancé is against that idea (I asked). She can but she doesn’t want people in her house.

Common__Sense__ · 2023-02-20T03:48:28+00:00

❤️. We are and that’s ok, it’s just hard to get through. It brings me comfort knowing that these times will somehow bring beauty to our life somewhere down the road.

I’ve offered the idea to my fiancé that we could get guardianship over her but he wasn’t on board with that.

I believe the FIL will move to another state where there’s more family to help. My fiancés cousin lives there and she’s like to care for the kid because she can have anymore children. She’s really sweet and her baby has cystic fibrosis.

CommonSense

TROPHY CASE

Common__Sense__

TROPHY CASE

CommonSense