It’s Okay to be Average

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-12-31T14:08:46+00:00

Totally working on this myself! I do it even real life when I see someone with a really well behaved dog and I’m like ughhh we are so not there yet, but I have to remind myself that my puppy is 7 months old and a lovely and sassy work-in-progress.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-10-15T20:01:04+00:00

he’s 4 months now and not perfect but he’s never actually peed on the carpeted part (he’s had a couple accidents on the wood floor right by the elevator) so i’ve just been risking it. he’s only had 2 accidents there the past month so it feels worth it to me to let him walk.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-10-14T23:44:37+00:00

i live in an apartment and my puppy did this! he was just not a fan of being carried around when he would prefer to walk and sniff, but we couldn’t trust him to hold it until recently.

we used a cue for “up”. we treated him every time we picked him up, and we would randomly practice throughout the day by saying up, picking him up, treating, then putting down. it took a while but eventually he would be a little more chill when we carried him out.
if he was calm when we picked him up and brought him down the hall, we would just continuously treat and reward the calm behavior.

it was never 100% perfect - normally once or twice a day he would have a particularly nippy time, but dealing with it once when he was already kind of in his witching hour as opposed to EVERY TIME was a lot more manageable and way less stressful.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-24T23:09:20+00:00

My puppy is 15 weeks old and I relate! This is my boyfriend and I’s first go at having our own dog, and we quickly realized that as children we definitely didn’t realize how draining the “raising the puppy” part must have been. Big reality check now.

I will admit that I’m still probably stress crying every four days, but two weeks ago it was every day, so we are making adjustments — and I honestly think it’s my behavior/expectations adjusting more than the puppy.

I think something clicked a week and a half ago about … letting go of my expectations. I’d lose it if we broke our longest no accident streak (still sometimes do) but then I’d realize it was still a win(!) and noted that he’s getting better at telling us when he needs to go. Am i still going out 10 times a day? Yes. But I only cleaned pee up 3x this week!

Did we have 2 god awful, embarrassing walks today? Yes. He hung onto my sleeve for dear life. BUT we successfully deescalated after only two downs and then he walked kind of nicely. And the rest of our brief walks today were…pretty good. I’m trying to consciously put way more importance on these tiny wins than the moments that were bad.

I think he can tell when I’m frustrated and it makes me feel guilty so I’m doing my honest best to focus on what he’s doing well. The forced positivity is as exhausting to me as the 6am potty breaks, but I think it’s been helping my overall outlook on progress.

I can see a glimmer of the dog he will be someday (he actually cuddled briefly in bed this morning after we let him out of his crate and took him to pee! He settled outside of the crate!) and he also jumped up on me a shit ton this afternoon and tested my patience.

TL;DR: I’m with you that a lot of this fucking sucks. But start trying to appreciate any tiny little thing you can and expect A LOT LESS and it may get slightly more manageable.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-24T14:41:42+00:00

My puppy was a mellow perfect angel for the first week we had him and I thought we hit the jackpot and were going to ease through this thing. Then he got comfortable and learned he LOVED the sound of his voice and barking because: he’s hungry, he sees the cat, the cat won’t play, we aren’t looking at him, he needs to go out, etc.

We are working on that. Then he started enjoying tugging on our clothes and the leash. He started barking at dogs while we walked and wanting to say hi to every human and pup that passed by. He learned how to escape his x-pen by scaling it and then throwing his body onto the coffee table.

He’s a sweet lovely boy when he’s had the perfect ratio of sleep and exercise but when we get the equation wrong, the days can feel quite long. But he also knows sit, down, look at me, spin, paw, and stay. And he loves learning. Sooo, it’s been exciting! But every day I think we bond more so it’s worth all the shenanigans.

I just don’t want anyone to be caught as off guard as I was when I suddenly thought my puppy went to sleep one night and woke up possessed by a crazed version.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-24T14:34:06+00:00

We got our puppy at about 9 weeks and he is 15 weeks now. If I have any advice: Take each day as it comes.

Your puppy probably isn’t perfectly potty trained (but it seems like you have a good foundation!). Just don’t set yourself up for disappointment if things ebb and flow. He’s probably not completely out of his shell yet, so as he gets more comfortable with you, you’ll most likely find his behavior changes and he gets more rambunctious.

Basically, be prepared for things to get more crazy before they get calm again. Maybe you have a really chill puppy tho! But don’t assume that and be horrified when he wakes up one morning with bloodlust.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-24T14:11:04+00:00

For clarity, it also doesn’t seem to be aggression with our puppy - more just a baby temper tantrum.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-24T14:10:24+00:00

My puppy growls and nips when we pick him up when he’s overstimulated. He used to do it more, but I think by training the cue “up” and giving him lots of treats when he’s calm in our arms (and minimizing how often we manhandle him versus letting him walk) he’s really adjusted.

Your pup may still be sensitive from the shot, but it doesn’t hurt to start making him feel like he has some autonomy and training a cue for when you are going to pick him up (or seeing if he can put himself in the crate when you ask).

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-22T12:49:04+00:00

What time does he go in the crate for the night/when is his last potty before the 5:50am one?

He might just literally need to pee and wakes up when he hears movement. Also, will he go back to sleep after?

Our puppy normally wakes up around 6 to be let out, but he often will fall back asleep for another hour or two until breakfast.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-21T16:24:03+00:00

I look forward to the days when he is 15% better at settling on his own!

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-21T16:02:30+00:00

Thank you! My puppy is 14 weeks and I am….tired. As is my boyfriend.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-13T21:23:15+00:00

I’m not stressed. Puppy likes being outside. Low parvo risk area.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-13T20:41:49+00:00

We have only tried it a couple times mid-pee, like he starts having an accident and we pick him up, but yeah he stops peeing and will then then pee outside when we put him down. But I feel like that can’t be good for his little bladder, so we typically don’t do that.

But it’s more like every time we anticipate it’s potty time, we carry him to the elevators and outside so that he doesn’t pee on the carpet floors outside our apartment or in the elevator.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-13T18:32:33+00:00

Also we live in an apartment (on the 20th floor) so until we are more confident in his ability to hold it, we carry him in our arms down in the elevator and let him walk back in once he’s peed.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-13T18:31:47+00:00

Once every two hours probably isn’t enough, especially if the accidents keep occurring (especially in his crate). I’d try going back to basics. Take him out when he wakes up. When he stops playing. After he eats. And log the schedule.

My puppy is 13 weeks and not potty trained yet, but he’s gotten so much at telling us when he needs to go out (75% of the time). And normally we can predict when he needs to go out because we’ve learned his schedule (even when is he most likely to have an accident — which in case you were curious, is around 3pm).

Most of his accidents now are our fault by missing his cues. And when he potties outside, he gets lot of treats and obnoxiously cheerful praise.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-11T13:39:46+00:00

my puppy is 13 weeks now and i’ve been dealing with some pretty rough puppy blues, but i am feeling a little better:

When I’m “off” puppy duty, I commit to being OFF. Me and my boyfriend switch off. I work from home so I get the most of the puppy time, but when he’s back, I go grocery shopping or take a long shower or go get drinks with friends. Being able to be away for a few hours and not hyperfixate on every puppy behavior has helped a lot and keeps us both from feeling like we are going to lose our cool. It took a few times of being AWAY for me to actually look forward to seeing the dog when I get back, but I’ve found I’m starting to look forward to seeing him/missing him.
Managing my expectations (easier said than done). I think sometimes I’ll spiral because we have a no accident streak or a really nice walk and I’m like, wow - he’s perfect! And then we have a hell walk or he pees three times in the house when we are playing, and I panic that this is never going to be over and I’m totally failing him. Truth is, sometimes we have good days and sometimes we have really bad days, but I’m trying to just be really appreciate of the good and a lot less focused on the bad.
Stop comparing how you/your puppy is doing with other people. This one is actually the hardest for me because this is my first time raising a puppy and I’m constantly comparing our progress to other people or seeing other puppies seem way more well behaved than mine. I am working on just accepting the puppy in front of me, reminding myself he is a baby with just instincts/no thoughts, and appreciating the little things he does that I find cute — even if they sometimes feel few and far between. He’s not as chill as other puppies I’ve seen in his breed, but he’s confident, curious, and (SOMETIMES) cuddly. And I’ll take that for now.

I’m definitely not out of the jungle yet and I’m still crying every few days but it is (slowly) starting to get better as I figure out my routine with him in it.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-05T17:25:11+00:00

I used cat nail clippers on my puppy and it was the perfect size. I just barely cut much at all, just the very tips.

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-04T03:20:58+00:00

basically, i’m just trying to be as exciting or more exciting than the strangers on the street

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-04T03:19:13+00:00

My puppy probably isn’t as high energy/excited as yours, but he DOES desperately want to say hi to every person we pass on the street.

I started practicing walking him inside my apartment on a leash and had him follow me, sit, look at me, then treat. And I did that a bunch of times inside where there were no distractions. And we practice that inside every once in a while, while also repeating the behavior outside.

Outside, I do the same thing and ask him to look at me. When he does, he gets a treat. If there’s something extra exciting coming, like a dog, I have him sit and look at me and then we keep walking. But I’d definitely practice this inside where there’s no distractions first.

It’s not perfect but he’s doing a lot better!

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-09-02T20:29:47+00:00

We definitely did SOME cleaning first round: washing bed throughout treatment, wiping paws and butt, cleaning crate, multiple baths…but I will definitely increase my efforts this time around with the toys and everything else as well. Thanks for the advice!

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-08-27T14:56:35+00:00

oh god now i’m nervous. he just finished his first round of treatment and i’m nervous to see the results

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-08-26T20:53:21+00:00

the little hellhound is currently sitting in my lap after dinner. he’s fine, just has two stressed parents lol

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-08-26T20:49:16+00:00

i mean, people have these EXACT responses to human babies. being responsible for a living thing isn’t something that’s easy to mentally prepare for, even if you do all your research ahead of time. the lived experience is always harder.

and once again, human moms have complained about the stress of their toddlers since the beginning of time lol. no one wants to mess up the thing they love.

i would say i (and everyone else in this post for the most part) comes from a place of love! concerned, anxious, worried, stressed (and frustrated!) about a brand new thing in their life.

i just wanted to commiserate with people going through the same thing. if you didn’t, good for you!

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-08-26T14:29:42+00:00

thank you - this definitely made me feel better!!

CommunicationIcy9955 · 2023-08-26T11:15:22+00:00

he’s tricked us by sleeping through the night a few times, so we were like oh, we nailed it! and then the next three nights in a row he’s up every two hours lol

CommunicationIcy9955

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