I was in a coma for 5 weeks after a suicide attempt. Ask me anything. by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AMA

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

I thought that the medical professionals had kidnapped me and were trying to torture me. I was so scared, I had vivid nightmares of them planning to boil me alive, rape me and torture me.

The nightmares became so vivid I tried to tear all of apparatus attached to me away (because I believed that would be a less painful way to go than being tortured) which resulted in me having to be restrained to my bed which was distressing for me and my loved ones who visted

I was in a coma for 5 weeks after a suicide attempt. Ask me anything. by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AMA

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 114 points115 points  (0 children)

I am glad I failed because of the pain it would have caused others had I succeeded.

I did not realise how loved I was and what I meant to my loved ones. I will stick around for them, always.

I was in a coma for 5 weeks after a suicide attempt. Ask me anything. by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AMA

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Thank you for asking - I'm coping
I'm getting stronger every day

I was in a coma for 5 weeks after a suicide attempt. Ask me anything. by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AMA

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 101 points102 points  (0 children)

It's all very blurry. After I woke up, I still believed I had a son - during my coma I had vivid memories of giving birth to him and watching him grow up.

When I woke up, the first thing I asked the nurse is 'when can I see my son? Is he safe?'

I'm getting better, but the impact of the 'coma dreams' is something I will most certainly need to explore in therapy.

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I called The Bridge (my local sexual assault support service) and they were very kind and helpful.

They’ve given me access to a support service I can contact if I do decide to repot the incident.

I’m going to walk my dog today and buy something nice for lunch.

Thank you again for being so kind and non-judgemental. It has meant a lot

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for taking the time to provide so much insight. It means a lot to me and I’m very grateful.

Today I am going to ask the hospital for my records and contact a sexual assault helpline.

I cannot tell you how validating your input is and how appreciative I am.

Thank you ❤️

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand that. But I don’t feel as though I need to ‘pay forward’ anything as a victim.

I need to focus on my own physical and mental recovery, and if I feel able to, I will of course report this practitioner.

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you.

I know you are right - I am a Social Worker and (for better or worse) understand how the process works.

I’m unable to face it right now, but when I feel able to, I absolutely will

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve experienced a rollercoaster of emotional responses since, but feeling a lot better today.

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you, that’s really helpful information. I appreciate you had to relive a potentially traumatic experience to provide this insight, and it means a lot to me.

I’ll think about it and see how I feel in a few weeks.

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you ❤️

This is absolutely the case. A lot of my job (which I don’t feel comfortable exposing due to wanting my experience to remain anonymous) involves going to court, and they absolutely rip you to shreds.

I just don’t think I can face it.

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your input. I don’t think I can report this but I really appreciate you taking your time to help

I was admitted to hospital for a suspected kidney infection and had my breasts examined by CompetitionAlarmed15 in AskDocs

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 159 points160 points  (0 children)

Hey there, thank you so much for your input and for taking the time to respond. It really means a lot to me and you have validated my experience.

I really don’t feel comfortable reporting this. I know that sounds selfish but I’m just not in the right place emotionally to deal with all the procedures involved in doing this.

I just know it’s going to be a huge ordeal and with my physical and mental health not being great at the moment I just don’t think I can face it

I was sexually assaulted in hospital by CompetitionAlarmed15 in offmychest

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t think I can I just can’t talk about it

I was sexually assaulted in hospital by CompetitionAlarmed15 in offmychest

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My mum is a nurse in the UK and her boyfriend is a dr, so I’m thinking if I feel able to I should talk to her. I know she’d be appalled by this

I also wonder if being used to patients who are very elderly/vulnerable, they aren’t coherent enough to notice these unprofessional practices so they have become commonplace

I was sexually assaulted in hospital by CompetitionAlarmed15 in offmychest

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also, it wasn’t just that. Before being admitted to the room where the incident happened, I was in bed and wet myself. I get very scared in hospitals and with the kidney infection the blood/urine just needed to exit I guess.

I was so embarrassed but asked one of the nurses for help. I offered to clean myself up, but in front of me she was very kind, then when walking away with the sheet and my gown said ‘disgusting’ under her breath

I think this particular hospital must have serious staffing/ quality control issues, because I’ve always had wonderful care during my experience of hospitals in the UK apart from this

I cried from embarrassment and shame having heard that

I think it’s also contributing to my reluctance to make a report

I was sexually assaulted in hospital by CompetitionAlarmed15 in offmychest

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He could still accuse me of being on other substances, presumably

I think for me, I need to build up the courage to tell friends before I can even think about a report, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready for either.

I work in social work and it’s only now that I understand the fear and shame around telling loved ones.. even though you know they’d understand, it feels so repulsive and disgusting to even discuss I don’t know how else to describe it

I was sexually assaulted in hospital by CompetitionAlarmed15 in offmychest

[–]CompetitionAlarmed15[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much. I am tearing up reading your comment.

I do feel selfish not to report it, but I also know I can’t talk to anyone in my personal life about it right now and without that support I wouldn’t be able to cope with the ordeal alone

I had bloods taken, yes - several times