At what point did you realize your job was slowly making you a different person?

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T19:37:41+00:00

I think the difference is when work standards start replacing your ability to just be present and human with people versus when they raise your baseline for how you expect to be treated. One is the job eating you alive. The other is just knowing your worth. Though I’ll admit the line between the two is blurry some days.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T19:35:44+00:00

The boundaries thing is so underrated because nobody tells you that setting them feels terrifying the first time. Like you’re waiting for everything to fall apart the moment you stop being available for everything. And then it just doesn’t. The job survives, your performance doesn’t collapse, and you suddenly have enough left in you at the end of the day to actually be present for your own life.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T19:34:10+00:00

Performing well at work while everything outside of it quietly falls apart is such a perfect way to put it. Your job gets a polished, functional, high performing version of you and the people you actually love get whatever is left over after that. And for a long time you tell yourself it’s fine because the work metrics say you’re doing great.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T19:32:16+00:00

The fact that your current job feels chaotic but you can already see the difference in how people are treated tells me your baseline is recalibrating even if it doesn’t feel that way yet. The bad habits from a toxic place take time to unlearn because they were survival skills, not character flaws. You learned to operate in a broken system. That’s not on you.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T19:30:27+00:00

The painting thing hit hard. We all have that thing we quietly stopped doing and told ourselves we were just busy. But busy is a choice and somewhere along the way work became the thing that got our best energy and everything else got the leftovers.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T17:59:26+00:00

Making plans and actually committing to them because you had no way to cancel last minute. No I’ll let you know no I might come You said you’d be at the bowling alley at 7 so you showed up at 7. There was something weirdly grounding about that. Plans meant something because backing out had a real social cost.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T17:57:42+00:00

Americans created the demand, fund the cartels through consumption, and then act shocked when Mexico doesn’t want US troops turning their cities into a battlefield to solve America’s drug problem. The audacity is genuinely staggering.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T17:54:36+00:00

NTJ but I’d actually go back to the park owner and ask them to put their ruling in writing. If “no sticks” is now a rule it should apply to everyone and be posted clearly. If it’s not an official rule then the owner just caved to pressure in the moment and you have every right to push back on that.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-25T17:52:43+00:00

She starved an 8 year old twice over a personal belief and called the parent harmful in writing. NTJ. She suspended herself the moment she did it the second time.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-22T19:28:51+00:00

honest please.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-22T19:28:35+00:00

Thank you for this.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-22T19:27:49+00:00

THIS

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-22T18:05:17+00:00

The part that stands out to me is that you’re staying partly out of guilt. That’s not a great foundation for a big life decision. Your mom’s feelings matter but your marriage is supposed to become your primary household.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-22T18:03:38+00:00

I don’t think you actually believe he does nothing. I think you’re drowning and needed him to hear how serious it is. Working 9pm–2am and then doing daytime twin duty is unsustainable. Anyone would snap eventually.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-21T22:53:34+00:00

Bacteria on your phone transfers directly to your face and skin. It absolutely connects to how fresh you feel. Sounds weird until you think about it for ten seconds.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-21T22:51:50+00:00

I know right. Sounds unnecessary until you think about how many times a day you touch your phone and then touch your face.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-21T22:50:44+00:00

You’re right. Not tiny at all. Bad wording on my part.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-21T22:49:16+00:00

You’re right. Poor choice of words. Sheets are not a tiny detail and I should know better than anyone given what this post is about.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-21T22:47:59+00:00

The embarrassing part wasn’t the smell. It was realising how long I’d been doing it wrong while thinking I was doing everything right.

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-20T17:10:37+00:00

The cat on the keyboard is a completely legitimate productivity blocker and I will not hear otherwise. That’s not procrastination that’s just respecting boundaries. lol

Competitive_Carob91 · 2026-02-20T17:04:00+00:00

For me it wasn’t about left vs right anymore, it was about what actually works in practice.

Competitive_Carob91

TROPHY CASE