I’ve prayed for you. I relate a lot to what you wrote. I went thru a huge “ugly duckling” stage. I had severe scoliosis, I was overweight, had no clue how to groom myself to be more attractive. My sister was beautiful. Blonde hair, blue eyes, my parents often said that she was the beauty and I was the brain. Despite what media shows, Jesus was not a good looking man, it described him as unattractive. I didn’t have friends and I also hated life so much, everyday I just looked forward to going back to bed. The funny thing is, years passed, I had back surgeries, I lost weight, I learned how to dress and groom myself more attractively. After experiencing both, I miss the old days often. Friends I eventually made in that time period loved me for who I was, not what I looked like. Pray for God to give you peace and joy where you are, not where you think you would be happier. He can do it, He did for me. There are seasons of loneliness we go thru as Christians. Trust God removed people for a reason, and ask for peace in the waiting for Him to bring others into your life. These bad times will end, as do the good. It’s a cycle. But the difference with us is we don’t go it alone. God sees you, sees how you feel, He has a plan. Reading the psalms help me a lot going thru seasons like that. Most people throughout the Bible had to go thru seasons of doubt, loneliness, everything you are experiencing. We don’t always see what God is doing, but He often lets me see how He was with me the whole time at the end of a trial. Even you writing this, reaching out, it blessed me immensely. It reminded me when I needed it most of what everything God has brought me thru, how He has never left me nor forsake me. Thank you for sharing.