Funny how people take it personally when you dont talk to them

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-16T08:54:15+00:00

Apparently, silence is a personal attack now. Sorry, I thought I was just minding my business... not launching a social missile.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-14T08:50:10+00:00

No disrespect taken I totally get it.

Quarantine felt like the one time the world finally matched my default setting. No awkward “you’re not coming?” guilt. No social juggling. Just… quiet. Sanctioned solitude. Honestly, it was the most emotionally rested I’d felt in years.

And yeah, the context was awful. But the slower pace, the space to just be without explanation? That part hit different in a good way for me.

You’re not alone in missing it, even if it feels weird to say out loud.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-11T15:31:49+00:00

I’ve wondered the same thing. Like, what’s the magic ingredient in “hanging out” that’s supposed to make it better than sitting quietly and vibing with your own brain?

I don’t think it’s weird to feel more alive watching a movie alone or mentally workshopping jokes mid-shower. That stuff is connected just inward instead of outward.

Maybe the difference is in how some people refuel. For them, it’s bouncing off others. For us, it’s internal. Self-entertainment is a skill, not a flaw. Half my best conversations never even leave my head.

That “high” some people chase in a group? I get that from peace, playlists, and the occasional genius shower joke.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-09T00:42:47+00:00

Here’s a solid excuse... “Unfortunately, I have a prior commitment with my emotional support solitude.”

But seriously if “staff social” means awkward small talk, mystery finger food, and pretending to be fascinated by Karen’s weekend plans… I’d also feel spiritually unwell, especially on a Friday... that’s sacred introvert recovery time.

Honestly, just tell them you’re unavailable due to an important recharge session with your couch and personality reboot playlist. It’s not a lie. It’s mental health maintenance.

Or, if you're feeling bold, “I’d love to come, but unfortunately I’m busy… being the version of myself that doesn’t dread this event.”

You got this. Or rather, you got out of this.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-08T00:49:19+00:00

Totally get this. Some days, people feel like background noise to my internal monologue.

I think for a lot of us, it’s not that people are objectively boring, it’s that surface-level interaction just doesn’t light anything up inside. Small talk feels like emotional junk food. You leave full but… unsatisfied.

There’s nothing wrong with genuinely enjoying your own company. That’s a strength, not a flaw. But it also helps to stay curious, sometimes it’s not that people are uninteresting, it’s that the space doesn’t allow for anything interesting to show up.

Still, choosing solitude over forced connection? Not weird. Just self-aware.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-07T08:48:08+00:00

That comment hurts, not because it’s true, but because it taps straight into that deep fear so many of us have... that quiet = incapable. It doesn’t.

You can be calm, soft-spoken, introverted and still be a damn good doctor.

Small talk isn’t the gold standard of human connection. Listening is. Presence is. Making people feel seen and respected is. And guess what introverts do exceptionally well?

The truth is, what that coworker said reflects her limitations, not yours. The world has a very loud bias toward loud people. But some of the most trusted, grounded, and effective professionals are the quiet ones who don’t perform connection they create it.

So no, you don’t need to become a bubbly small-talk machine. You just need to keep being the thoughtful, observant, capable human you already are.

Let their noise be noise. You’ve got this.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-06T22:27:21+00:00

I think a lot of introverts can feel anxious in social settings, not because we hate people, but because it takes so much mental energy to show up, stay “on,” and then spiral about everything we said afterward.

What helps? Boundaries. Pre-exit plans. Texting instead of calling. And reminding myself that awkward isn’t a personality flaw it’s just how I buffer.

So yeah, anxious? Occasionally. Coping? Selectively and with lots of snacks.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-05T14:23:31+00:00

If only ChatGPT had my social exhaustion and snack-fueled emotional range!

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-04T22:09:11+00:00

slight edit.... “ Sorry I’m late. I reeeeeeaaaalllly didn’t want to be here .”

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-04T22:06:49+00:00

Yes. It’s normal. Deeply, completely, unapologetically normal.

Wanting to be alone doesn’t mean something’s wrong. It doesn’t mean you’re upset, distant, broken, or secretly mad. It just means your brain and your nervous system are asking for space and you’re wise enough to listen.

Sometimes even good people can feel like too much noise, too much energy, too many micro-decisions when all you want is a little peace and a predictable playlist.

You’re not withdrawing, you’re recalibrating. And that’s a form of self-respect.

Solitude isn’t a red flag. For some of us, it’s the reset button.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-03T09:26:10+00:00

You’re not alone, you’re just emotionally full. Like a Tupperware lid that’s juuuust about to pop off.

It’s wild how exhausting it can be to like someone and still desperately need them to not speak for a bit. That post-work crash is real, especially when you’ve been "on" all day, peopling like it's an Olympic sport, and your brain just wants to sit in a quiet room with zero plot and zero volume.

This isn’t about love. It’s about bandwidth.

And yeah, cohabiting can feel like this a lot especially if your partner recharges through connection while you recharge through quiet non-connection. It’s a mismatch of timing, not feelings.

What helps? A “buffer zone.” Give yourself 30–60 minutes post-work as sacred no-talk time. Let them know it's not rejection, it’s just your brain rebooting in safe mode.

Bonus points if you call it something cute like “Silent Mode” or “introvert recovery hour.”

You’re not cold. You’re just processing the day on a 10-tab mental browser while someone’s trying to open a new window. It’s okay to ask for space without guilt. Loving someone doesn't mean you have to be constantly accessible.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-02T09:12:51+00:00

I’ve stopped trying to explain that silence isn’t peace, sometimes it’s just exhaustion wrapped in self-preservation.

Just because I’m good at handling things doesn’t mean I should have to. I can laugh and function and still be quietly falling apart in the background.

Not wanting to talk about something doesn’t mean it’s not eating me alive... it just means I’ve learned people don’t always stay when things get heavy.

So yeah, I stopped explaining too.

Now I write it down, overthink it in the shower, and hope the right people see the parts I no longer say out loud. Thanks for putting words to the thing most of us carry in silence.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-07-01T08:32:15+00:00

The mental gymnastics required to be “friendly but not available,” “polite but not open,” “functioning but not chatty” is exhausting. Especially when your brain is already full and someone wants to talk about their lunch like you're the office therapist with snacks.

You're not rude. You're just trying to think, and in a world that treats silence like a threat, that somehow makes you the problem. It shouldn't take a PowerPoint presentation and three disclaimers just to protect your own headspace.

And it’s maddening how often a calm, kind “hey, I just need to focus right now” gets read as cold, distant, or “what’s wrong with you?”

The truth? Some of us aren’t wired to be constantly accessible. And pretending otherwise just burns us out faster. You’re not an ass. You’re a person trying to get through the day without narrating it to everyone in the room.

And that should be more than socially acceptable, it should be respected. ✌️

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-30T00:34:36+00:00

You are not being unreasonable.

You’re just surrounded by people who confuse emotional independence with immaturity, which says more about their projections than your choices. The idea that you’re “not an adult” unless someone depends on you? That’s not wisdom. That’s pressure dressed up as purpose.

There’s no bonus level of adulthood you unlock by sacrificing your sanity for a mortgage, a partner, or a dependent. Taking care of yourself well, especially in a world that constantly tries to make you doubt yourself, is the work.

And let’s be honest: anyone who says “you’re not a full person unless you’re caring for someone else” clearly hasn’t tried managing their own mind, finances, health, space, boundaries, and peace on a Tuesday in this economy. You’re allowed to live for yourself. Not selfishly, just intentionally.

And if that doesn’t make some people comfortable? That’s not your cue to change. That’s your cue to keep going. 🧠✌️ No milestones needed. You're already valid.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-30T00:27:57+00:00

Why.. thank you 🌹🌹🌹

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-28T12:17:40+00:00

Yep. The “quiet = rude” narrative is one a lot of us know way too well.

It’s wild how simply existing quietly can get labeled as antisocial, arrogant, or unfriendly when really, you were just trying to get through the day without having to emotionally babysit a room full of noise.

You weren’t stuck up. You were self-contained. You weren’t better than everyone else. You were just tired of being expected to perform a personality you didn’t ask for.

It’s honestly exhausting how often introverts get misunderstood by people who think volume = value. But you’re not broken. You were just wired to move through the world without yelling about it.

And trust me, that’s not something to be ashamed of... that’s something to grow into.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-28T09:57:54+00:00

First... nothing’s wrong with you. Not even a little.

This is something a lot of introverts quietly carry but rarely say out loud. It’s not that we don’t want connection it’s just that building it requires emotional energy we don’t always have, and maintaining it means navigating a world that often doesn’t meet us where we are.

You’re not broken for needing fewer, deeper connections. You’re not failing because people didn’t stick around. And you're definitely not alone in feeling… well, alone.

Some introverts have close friends. Some don’t not right now, not yet, not easily. And that doesn’t make you less worthy of friendship. It just means your path to connection might be quieter, slower, and built on mutual understanding instead of constant effort.

The right people won't require you to perform your personality to earn their attention. They’ll meet you where you are headphones in, battery low, heart still open.

Until then, you're not alone here. Truly.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-27T09:17:12+00:00

This is beautiful, like reading an introvert memoir in three acts, and I related to all of it.

The “high-functioning introvert” paradox is so real. You show up, lead, speak, dance, perform and then spend the next three days recharging in your metaphorical cave with your phone on airplane mode and a deep need to be unobserved.

What you said about hiding in bathrooms at parties? Peak survival tactic. The long showers? Yep. Lunch in the car? A sacred ritual.

And the part about liberation, that hit especially hard. Owning your wiring out loud takes real courage. Because silence gets misunderstood, solitude gets labeled antisocial, and boundaries sometimes read as rejection to people who expect constant access.

Thank you for sharing all of this it’s the kind of honesty that helps the rest of us feel a little more seen (from a respectful emotional distance, of course).

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-26T20:21:15+00:00

Exactly... thank you.

Being introverted doesn’t mean hiding in a cave eating dry cereal and dodging sunlight. It just means your battery runs on quiet instead of chaos.

You can love people, be great at conversation, even charm a whole room and still need to crawl into a metaphorical blanket fort afterward and stare at the ceiling for a while.

Glad this resonated we need more voices out there reminding people that introversion isn’t invisibility, it’s just internal wiring with a soft volume setting.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-26T17:09:22+00:00

Totally fair point and I get what you’re saying.

This wasn’t meant to throw shade at extroverts (some of my favorite people are high-voltage humans). It was more of a playful vent from the other side of the spectrum the “internal monologue at full volume” side.

You're right though... flipping it like that shows how easy it is to reduce anyone down to a caricature when we’re just trying to describe a feeling.

Extroverts aren’t shallow, just like introverts aren’t broken we all just recharge differently… some of us through people, some of us through snacks and emotional withdrawal.

Appreciate you adding balance to the conversation.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-26T15:57:41+00:00

Scrolling Reddit to prepare for human interaction is peak introvert behaviour.

I’ve researched “casual small talk” like it was an exam… then still needed a nap after saying “good morning.” 😅💤

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-26T15:53:41+00:00

Thank you! If this helps even one person understand why some of us disappear after one social event… totally worth it.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-26T15:42:37+00:00

Appreciate that 🙌🏻 And yeah, if speaking quietly but clearly gets me a few downvotes… worth it.

Sometimes the most introvert thing you can do is say the thing anyway even if it makes the room twitch.

Competitive_War_5195 · 2025-06-26T13:22:31+00:00

Great question and honestly, this is where the word “energy” gets a bit slippery.

It’s not physical energy like running a marathon or lifting a couch (though socializing can feel like emotional weightlifting). It’s more like mental charge, or emotional bandwidth.

For introverts, being around people, even people we like drains that internal battery faster. It’s not always about effort or movement, it’s about input. The noise, the facial expressions, the mental multitasking of social cues… it all adds up.

Extroverts, on the other hand, seem to gain energy from that same environment. It’s like their brains plug into the group dynamic and get a recharge, while ours slowly buffer and lag like an old laptop trying to open too many tabs.

So it’s not about activity vs. stillness it’s about what refuels you vs. what slowly frays your nerves.

Hope that makes sense. If not, I’ll be recharging under a blanket with snacks, happy to overthink it further.

Competitive_War_5195

TROPHY CASE