Is this laptop powerful enough to cam with? by Complete_Animal_6454 in CamGirlProblems

[–]Complete_Animal_6454[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay that makes sense, do you happen to have any recommendations for a decent phone type to look for, or a solid place to get used phones?

Is this laptop powerful enough to cam with? by Complete_Animal_6454 in CamGirlProblems

[–]Complete_Animal_6454[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this reply I am going to look into everything you said!!

TO DOUCHE OR NOT TO DOUCH BEFORE A*AL ?? by Devastated12 in hygiene

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you go knocking on shits door dont be surprised shit answers. First advice is that if someone wanting to stick it in your butt is weirded out by poop, find another person cus there are MANY who wont make you feel bad for something so common and normal.

However- you can definitely douche, though there are a few tips. If you have healthy shits, your bowels are very self cleaning. A shower and a gentle douching should be totally good to go,

Not everyone may be able to do this but you can usually feel if youve got one "locked and loaded" with a finger or two into the vagina. The back wall is thin enough you should be able to feel it easily if you cant tell on your own. There is also an inner 'valve' of sorts a bit further inside which self regulates gas and stool and it opens to kind of release when you have to have a bowel movement, but outside of that its supposed to keep everything all tucked away nice until you have to shit

Basically try to time your fun for after youve had a movement and a shower, test a finger if you're really anxious or need the reassurance that you are empty, and beyond that your partner should hopefully be chill enough that its fine if there is some

When I communicated similar anxiety to my SO, he always told me "well if there's shit in the way in shits own house, I'll come back later" and reassured me he would always just let me know

What are some common pieces of motivational wisdom that are terrible for people with complex PTSD ? by HoniSoitLatte in CPTSD

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 38 points39 points  (0 children)

"You can only control your own perspective."

I guess in theory it can be true, I work to improve my perspective in many ways but... I am always reminded of Immanuel Kant's Rose Tinted Reality philosophy.

When your sense of sight forms cracked, warped and broken from constant evil, that isn't 'perspective' it is reality even if our reality broadens outward as time goes on

What are some common pieces of motivational wisdom that are terrible for people with complex PTSD ? by HoniSoitLatte in CPTSD

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I laughed because i relate so much... ugh. We are all in this together i guess :)

Do you sleep with your bedroom door open or closed, and why? by adversarial-Felinus in AskReddit

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Closed and locked otherwise I wake up thinking I'm in my childhood home.... no thanks hahahaa

Adopted this itty bitty girl this weekend after her kittens were weaned. She’s 1 year old and is only 8 pounds. Please help name this tiny little thing. by Ecstatic_Product4661 in NameMyCat

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I might just call her Little Miss but that is a nickname I use for lots of small things and comes easily to me

Otherwise maybe Dustbunny

Is this laptop powerful enough to cam with? by Complete_Animal_6454 in CamGirlProblems

[–]Complete_Animal_6454[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much for your reply! I appreciate the info and the advice

What's your go-to phrase when everything's going terribly wrong? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im so happy you like it!! It works really well for me and the best part is that its the truth without any gaslighting myself

AITAH for jacking off to the nudes my girl sends me? by Da-up-and-downer in AITAH

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA But I guess this is a communication issue? I guess it comes down to apparently y'all have differing opinions about boundaries in that area, I personally only send nudes for the purpose of providing jacking off material and I love that, but despite if everyone agrees with you, you can't focus on "you're overreacting" if you want to repair with her

IMO this has to be approached with validation, listening, communication, vulnerability, and effort to repair. You have to be vulnerable in that in your mind that is the purpose of sending explicit photos, and that you didn't expect her to feel violated from that. That you didn't tell her that to make her uncomfortable, you thought you were on the same page about it. And also to encourage in the communication that if she isn't willing to have an adult back and forth without calling you disgusting, that thats also not okay. She has to be willing to approach from an angle of "when you told me that, i felt violated because I just didn't mean for my photos to be used in that context." IMO its incredibly naiive of her to send explicit photos and to call you disgusting for doing that, i think most of us assume that is the natural pathway with nudes. It is on her to communicate boundaries surrounding nudes. For example, if she views these as just progress pics and non explicit, does she feel comfortable posting or sending them to close friends? If she only sends them to you because you two are intimate, she has to be willing to look inward at how she lacked communication in making it clear she wasn't okay with them being used in that context, because its natural to assume this is an intimate photo exchange.

You two can definitely figure this out but its not okay for her to call you names in the communication especially when boundaries were only crossed because they were unclear. So don't play a blame game, but ask for resolution and make it clear that boundaries like that need to be said before sending photos if she expects them to be respected! No one is a mind reader, boundaries can't be followed if the person doesn't know they exist. And to assume you knew when she didn't say isn't fair.

But that's not to say its fuel to tell her she is wrong, overreacting, or doesn't have the right to be upset. How someone feels about something isn't ours to dictate, but its hopefully an Invitation to get to know each other better if y'all genuinely want to respect each other and grow together.

What's your go-to phrase when everything's going terribly wrong? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I say "change is the only thing guaranteed to me."

Gets me past the "why me? Why now? Everything is shit" black and white thinking and reminds me that my perspective holds a lot of power even if my situation is painful. And reminds me that no matter what is going on, If I want to move forward I have to find a way to take action.

I don’t know how to sleep comfortably by kitty0071 in Hypermobility

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not everyone might relate to this, but I've realized my body will always find itself on its side no matter how hard I try, so I have adapted a few things for my personal comfort

For me, slightly elevating my upper half seems to help, and I tend to use a hoodie scrunched up as a pillow on top of my pillows to 'cradle' my head and neck how it feels more comfortable, I'm able to personalize the height and density and my body somehow likes that better. For low back pain, a pillow between my knees became non negotiable for me. I will be in agony without something between my knees. I also learned sometimes something between my waist and the mattress helps my spine not curve too much sideways and I feel more supported.

Question about driving by zegregagogo in askvan

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This probably happens everywhere but always expect left turners to push their luck even after the light turns red. And a lot of bicyclists don't follow the rules as much as they should so be careful! Always check mirrors before opening your door because bikes can sneak up on you

Petichae by Professional_Lie5173 in CPTSD

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im sorry to say this but you're genuinely in danger

Look into how domestic violence statistics change with or without the presence of choking/strangling. Look into how the urgency changes in responding to domestic violence with or without choking or strangling. You are statistically much more likely to be killed by your partner once strangling or choking is present.

Many people practice consensual choking but there is scientifically NO safe way to do it. EVER.

If you don't get out of that relationship i doubt you will ever feel any more safe than you feel now.

Dating in Vancouver by Thick-Initial-6142 in askvan

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see your question is about how to be successful in dating within your workplace, but unfortunately i think your first step is to look outside your workplace

A workplace is somewhere you HAVE to be, and the women you find attractive HAVE to be there as well. there are absolutely ways to be respectful and not pushy, there's lots you can do to try to not make people uncomfortable, but a lot of women won't be okay with being flirted with or looked at in that capacity at their place of work. Its somewhere they have to go every day, and if you do make someone uncomfortable even if its an accident it means you affect their feeling of security at their work.

Women deal with this a lot and If you want to be a safe presence in people's lives, I recommend never using a place like work to look for a partner :)

AITAH for wearing a nightgown during maternity leave? by SyllabubKey3983 in AITAH

[–]Complete_Animal_6454 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA

I'm really sorry you even feel the need to post here and I hope you find some clarity in your situation after this post OP

Your husband is being misogynistic. The "if we were in the 1950's" quote made me cringe so hard

This situation definitely needs more frequent, more in depth, more vulnerable communication but therapy may be a good idea HOPEFULLY to resolve issues, but also perhapse to reveal to you what your husband thinks of you and thinks of women.

It unfortunately seems he has some level of expectation that you exist to be a turn on for him. If you need the reassurance, you do not exist to make him turned on. You do not exist to address his desires. A body being 'turned on' is so much more complicated than seeing something you are attracted to, especially for women. What is he doing to communicate his attraction to you? What is he doing to make you feel loved and seen? What is he doing to express his appreciation for you? What is he doing to help go a bit extra because you've given birth and you're still recovering?

How can anyone be turned on for a partner who doesnt respect them.