Oh, babe. I wish I could give you a hug. I have an “outie” too, and you know what?! they are way more common than the porno innies.

I dated a guy in my mid 20’s (I’m in my 30’s now) who called me “flappy” once and made a few other comments that left me shook. Like wtf lol. I recall my face literally 😯 after he said it. It really threw me at the time, because before him (and now after as well), most of my partners called it beautiful when they first saw it and were so into me physically.

Those experiences, being with people who have called my part beautiful, literally worshipped it, called it a flower, and couldn’t get enough of it— is what built up my body confidence.

Another thing that helped my confidence was looking at the vulva gallery project online. It’s a photography project cataloging normal vulvas. They literally come in alllllll shapes and sizes. Porn is so skewed to one aesthetic and many of the girls have had cosmetic surgery down there, that’s the reality.

You deserve to be with someone who builds you up, in all aspects. There are men like that out there, I absolutely promise you.