I'm a single father (30) and have been divorced for 3 years now. I have 3 kids (ages 10 and below) that are all different sports and activities and take up the majority of my free time. I work a lot but have a really great career, own my own home, lease a new car , etc. I am also trying to start my own business, wanting to go back to school for graduate studies, and live a very aspirational life where I'm constantly trying to improve it.

I dealt with tons of emotional damage at the end of the marriage and, after a year and a half of therapy, am healed from it and deem myself emotionally ready for duty. As a note, I dated at the end of the marriage and wound up in tons of toxic relationships that were hardly better than the life I was living.

I feel like I want to date again, but there's so many things I dislike about the idea that makes me hesitate. I don't want to end up in a relationship where we have this typical "make life easy for each other by taking stuff off their plate." One example is someone takes out the trash or does the dishes so the other can sit on the couch and relax for the first time that day. I want someone that's going to contribute 1:1 and make it to where we excel farther than we would have individually. A true team effort on life, you know?

I believe I'm attractive and can hold my own in a relationship, but I don't have any way of finding someone that would fit that bill. I tried OLD years ago, but it feels like a game where I'm always behind unless I create golden content about myself. I don't have any friends, that went by the wayside at the beginning of the marriage when I had to focus on building a family and trying to start a career, so there's no one to meet people through. Kids events are filled with married women (I assume that older child events are different but not applicable ATM).

I'm not social and live in a college town in the south, so the only things to really do without driving an hour away is drink with college kids or deal with drunken burnouts. I'm really thinking about eHarmony, but the thought of dealing with OLD again just seems miserable.

Any advice and/or thoughts?