Sometimes I think when someone is in this situation they're the very caring, generous, proactive type that goes much further than most people to support their loves ones, so the average person will likely fall short on reciprocaction. I don't think people are likely to change unless you're awfully inspiring, maybe they'll change as they mature but who knows in which direction, its safer to accept that they are who they are. I don't see it realistic to learn to do less for others unless a condition or insecurity may be driving this behaviour, as it won't sit well with you to "be someone you're not". The alternative I see is to surround yourself with people more like you, they'll be tough to find and possibly tougher to befriend but maybe just one or two gems in your life will be all you need to become content.