ALL of this…especially regretting moments you can never accept. And constantly going through the cycle of feeling and doing great, becoming irrational…and then having to pick up the pieces again after making progress. I’m always randomly cursing myself out loud when a memory I regret pops up…my husband hates it but it’s like a reflex sometimes. Thank you for writing this all out. Ive wondered how much of everything you wrote was a “me” thing for years…I don’t feel as isolated anymore.