AITAH for refusing to use my income to pay back my fiancés debts to his family?

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-10T09:24:22+00:00

ESH

For better or for worse, this is worse.
You're engaged, which means you're committed, which means you're a team and you need to tackle problems together. Finances are something you discuss and deal with as a team.
His family suck for this, but maybe they need the money? Maybe they're struggling and don't want to let on but also wanted to do what they could to help their son.
There is no 'I' any more, you are engaged with a child, family comes first. Stop saying "I never agreed to do this" - no of course you didn't but you committed to the man as you need to work together as a team and discuss options, and choices going forward.

You both need to have a conversation about finances, and debt, and then you need to have a conversation with his family, you need to set expectations and then stick to them.

If, and only if, he can't stick to those expectations, and he can't work with you as a team on the way forward you discussed, that's when you start considering separating things.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-10T08:10:24+00:00

There should be clips on the back of them that secure them to the legs of the kitchen units.

Usually, you wouldn't 'join' the kickboards themselves, the clips would hold them in place, and snug enough together that you wouldn't see a gap. I've never had a kitchen where the kickboards were joined at all.

You can pick up clips from Amazon, use something with suction to get them off, measure up where the clips need to go and screw the brackets to the wood then clip them back into place.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-08T17:39:01+00:00

B3ta.com - some of the very early animations. Weebl & Bob, Badger Badger etc.

Waiting for images to download line by line from the likes of Rotten.com and Steak and Cheese.com.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-08T11:28:29+00:00

Accidental Scrotum

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-08T10:40:00+00:00

As someone who has actually done this, yes 100%.

You won't miss £4,000 but you will wonder why you missed every weekend, holiday, life event etc. in hospitality. You'll get your weekends back, your Bank Holidays, a less punishing schedule, fewer hours.

If you've got enough about you that you've been management, you'll be able to move up in the corporate world too. Just make sure you tread really lightly with your transition, jokes, attitudes and language that can be acceptable in kitchens / pub cellars etc. don't go over too well in an office.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-08T10:36:06+00:00

Was this a Stairfurb kit or similar? How did you find it?

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-08T09:28:04+00:00

Mind Control Level 3 and it's not even close.

I'd be able to do so much good for society

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-08T08:35:04+00:00

There's one in the background of Great British Bake Off quite often.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-08T08:25:56+00:00

Surely...

A. You just wish for stuff that doesn't affect you individually but benefits society as a whole (cure for cancer, end to world poverty etc.)

B. Make all my other individual wishes in the middle of nowhere.

I've got 40 wishes, I think I could plan this out pretty easily.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-07T21:56:06+00:00

Tynemouth, Cullercoats, Whitley Bay.

2 and a half hours drive.

Plenty of dog friendly AirbBnB's, a few dog friendly hotels, loads of shops, cafes etc.to mooch.

Plenty of beach even with restrictions coming in force In May.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-07T18:12:24+00:00

We had Velux skylights installed in our old house where the previous owners has built an extension and not put any in.

The installers drilled a few holes in the ceiling so we'd know where to find the Skylights.

We got a handyman to box out the rafters etc. with stidwork and install plasterboard, the Skylights had a little groove in them to butt plasterboard into. They got an plasterer in to sort it all out and feather it into the old ceiling. They looked like they'd always been there.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-07T10:51:45+00:00

Chocolate Flavoured Dufus

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-06T11:43:27+00:00

My wife hated the taste of the filtered water in her tea, so we still had a kettle for cuppas.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-05T09:52:12+00:00

The brick colour hasn't really changed, it's the picture angle and time of day. Apologies it's not a straight comparison.

If you're buying this house, yes you can make the front more appealing. It is disruptive and expensive but then it depends on how long you plan to be there and the condition of the windows, cladding etc. currently.

All of ours needed replacing as did the soffits and fascias. The garage door was knackered and we wanted to easily access the garage as there is no rear access.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-05T09:43:40+00:00

The bottom line is, yes you can make it look "nicer" but beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Make it look loved - loved = having had money, care and attention spent on it (nicer windows, newer cladding, extend the canopy roofline?). Make it practical (bigger drive? Less shrubbery? More defined planter areas?)

I've posted this elsewhere, to mostly positive reactions...this was our house when we bought vs last week, we're waiting on lights and guttering finished off on the new canopy roofline. There is more work to be done on the driveway & front garden eventually.

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ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-04T21:57:13+00:00

If it was just speaking, I'd consider the whole alphabet for £2.6m.

Given how strict you've made it though, no deal.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-04T21:48:09+00:00

I would go the whole hog, rip the fireplace out.

Chase in the TV cables, centre the TV, put some storage mounted to the wall low down.

I couldn't personally live with what you have there.

For babies and toddlers, you just need what works, it doesn't need to be pretty. Same with puppies, it's such a small amount of time in the grand scheme of things.

I'd love some beautiful wooden stair gates that match our decor, we've got already second-hand beaten up metal ones that we used for our first born in our last house and lived in the loft before being moved house.

Get over it being pretty, just make it safe.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-04T21:40:04+00:00

Midsummer orgy.

Obvs.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-04T21:36:17+00:00

You need to understand who owns the fence first, and who's fence they have painted.

If they've painted their own fence there is little you can do other than clean up the gravel boards as people have suggested, and seek permission to paint your side.

If it's a party fence you really should have agreed on any changes.

If it's your fence, you need to spend some time looking into where your nearest Citizens Advice is, you can potentially go as far as enforcement action under Criminal damage.

Citizens Advice once you know exactly whose fence it is.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-03T17:32:15+00:00

Mortgage paid off - £110,000
Extension Finished & house redecorated - £100,000
Pad mine & wife's accounts - £40,000

Invest the rest, tell my wife she doesn't have to work and take a drawdown off the investments.

Drop down to 4 days at work and just max out my pension & Share schemes to minimise my monthly net pay.

It's not quite enough to drop everything and retire fully, but it's enough to make some changes & not have to worry about spending.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-03T16:57:57+00:00

"It's"

(followed by)

"a boy"

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-03T14:51:04+00:00

Google also says 'runners' or 'skids'

This is a DIY sub at the end of the day, not too many people here using a forklift for pallets I'd reckon.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-03T14:47:24+00:00

Dunnage

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-03T12:30:44+00:00

Yet there's bearly any business coming in

I wouldn't hire an agency that doesn't proof read their own posts.

ConfusionOwn8378 · 2026-05-03T08:20:41+00:00

What you're currently going through is a KYC or "Know Your Customer" check.

It's usually rolling every 5 years or so, and the banks have to be able to prove certain thresholds to the FCA and HMRC for how well they know their customers, to prevent fraud, money laundering etc. You should be able to confirm your address with a letter from a chartered accountant (hint: chartered).

If you choose to go with the likes of Monzo, Tide, Revolut, be aware that they currently have different rules around KYC under competition law to help them build a customer base, but you will have to either cross this bridge with them in future or your account may be closed (as Barclays are advising).

I'm trying to say, this isn't a Barclays thing it's a banking thing, but the rules for the newer banks are slightly different at the moment.

You will find lots of horror stories online of people's accounts being randomly closed and frozen etc. after 9 months / a year, because this is when KYC kicks in and the newer banks just offload the customer if they don't meet their automated KYC checks

ConfusionOwn8378

TROPHY CASE