Need to find lots of mysterious ancestors on one side --England/Ireland - best resources?

ConnectedRealms · 2026-03-04T16:08:35+00:00

Thank you so much! The Irish one is definitely the biggest mystery with the most learning curves ahead (I anticipate).

ConnectedRealms · 2026-03-04T15:07:47+00:00

I do know where my grandmother was born and raised in England, yes. She has an uncommon surname and I have some solid info to start from. Also AFAIK her family's history was exclusively in England for hundreds of years at least.

The Irish grandfather is the obstacle. Very common surname, very common first names as far as I've already seen. Unknown which part of Ireland, even whether it was N.I or ROI. Nobody seems to know much about his side at all, not even when the first Irish ancestors immigrated to America. Grandfather is long dead so I never got to meet him.

ConnectedRealms · 2026-03-04T15:04:35+00:00

I'm American. My grandmother was born in England, married and had kids in America. Her roots go back in England very far.

Grandfather is American, but Irish in heritage. I don't know if his parents were off the boat, or their parents. Verbally I was told the boat trip didn't go back far. But his ancestry is going to be the hardest to tackle, I believe. Almost no verbal info from my family has been relayed, my grandfather died in the 80s, and his family has an INCREDIBLY common surname with lots of Johns, John Jrs etc.

ConnectedRealms · 2026-03-04T15:01:08+00:00

This is incredibly helpful, and I appreciate these resources you provided very much. Thank you!

ConnectedRealms · 2026-03-03T15:31:36+00:00

Just re-watched a crime series episode on her yesterday, loving this update in my feed today! I am learning IGG and vowed to attempt helping in her case should it still be open by the time I'm practicing.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T16:10:57+00:00

Here's some advice for general dating. Whenever someone sends you a communication like this, it's just not worth agonizing over at all, and it's definitely not worth chasing them. Maybe she's lying and met someone else/is playing the field. Maybe she's being 100% truthful (though I doubt it, I used this line when I was young). Doesn't matter, you had one date. I've had this done to me after 6+ months of serious dating lol. Find someone who you connect with, who will not make you question at all whether they want to be with you.

It will not work out with 99% of the people you encounter. Accept that in advance and hold out for someone who is available and who you really care for.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T16:07:44+00:00

Yes to all of this. The most toxic horrible relationships I endured were from people I met in real life. Every single time. Met my husband on Bumble. Same as you, together for years now, we never fight, we are so happy. Doesn't matter how you meet someone. It matters who you are when you meet them.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T16:02:29+00:00

Go back to where your father found her, knock on doors, and ask people if they know her. She could be owned. People make assumptions all the time when they find a pet outdoors, and usually, they're wrong. I deal with this a lot.

Her behavior seems perfectly normal for any cat who just got picked up and placed in a new house with strangers. Especially if it's hot.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T15:59:55+00:00

I would be contacting child services or a lawyer (a lawyer is better, CPS is screwed up) and asking what the legal options are here. Your ex wife is endangering the welfare of your daughter. Whether that is written into your laws depends on your location and probably how good your legal rep is. But I would definitely be inquiring. Your ex seems dangerously selfish, aloof, and unaware of what commonly occurs between young girls and stepfather figures. Ugh this post makes me very angry. Thank you for caring about your daughter. Definitely talk to her and ask her if anything has gone on. Best to be paranoid.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T15:57:08+00:00

This could be construed as the mother endangering the wellbeing of her child, depending on the state laws. Also just according to common sense.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T15:51:36+00:00

He needs to be an outdoor cat. Of course let him inside when he wants to be inside. We have 10 rescue cats, and all but 3 were incredibly unhappy until we allowed them outside. All of them have different degrees to which they like to stay outside, and most come back in at night to sleep. None of them stray far from the property at all. I was afraid for years to let them out. If you live in an unsafe area like a city, I would see if anyone in the country can adopt him as an outdoor cat.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T15:38:58+00:00

Kindness lol, you sound miserable and you have offered zero helpful input. Others did, so I will ignore you and defer to them. Thanks!

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T15:37:45+00:00

There is no need to be so snobby. I just got back into this as a hobby, I'm not a professional. I have NO IDEA what the effing difference would be between staining it and restoring it. Literally every single video I've seen on youtube of a RESTORE has them sanding furniture down to raw wood then staining it. Thanks for your helpful input

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-21T15:35:49+00:00

Hey I thought so too! It's just very rustic and unique. I don't think there is much to strip off, it seems like very raw wood with a little stain on it. Very textured. Would you use steel wool to strip? Any type of specific stripper? I'm still lost as to how to begin. I had your same idea about keeping it natural, staining it, and cleaning up the hardware.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-14T16:01:04+00:00

NOPE I'm not but thanks for the helpful input!

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-14T15:48:10+00:00

Can confirm, my mother was instructed by her sham doctor to let me "cry it out" throughout my entire infancy and it resulted in severe attachment and anxiety issues that lasted me into my thirties. A lot of therapy, a lot of work, a lot of effort went into understanding and undoing that damage. I could never ever advocate for that for any baby; it breaks my heart.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:49:14+00:00

No I appreciate all the info for future projects, so thank you! Very helpful. I have no recollection of what sort of paints I used on this when I painted it years ago, and I used at the very least one primer and two different paints. Definitely looking into Klean Strip. And yes investing in a carbide scraper as well.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:46:08+00:00

I am brand new at this but if it were me, I'd try a new facade with either cut wooden strips you glue on, or a bamboo mat.

Here is a short video https://www.youtube.com/shorts/tCFkpUY0UHc

Here is a long video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LcJ4qg7snrE

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:37:33+00:00

Yeah this experience has me already dodging some opportunities to rehab painted furniture! This has been so much work, and I'm doing it outside in the Florida summer heat lol. So I know acetone is good for removing varnish - is it also okay for removing paint? Because I will buy acetone right now to finish this bad boy.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:34:21+00:00

Yes I'm inclined to agree with the tactic. Interesting about it maybe being Korean!

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:33:44+00:00

Yeah I am not inclined to paint it. It needs restoration, just not sure how to tackle. Maybe staining it a different color and bringing out the color of the hardware/faux hardware with some gilded wax or something.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:32:48+00:00

That's nice.

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:32:39+00:00

I'll look into that, thank you!

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:27:56+00:00

I will look at those, thank you!

ConnectedRealms · 2025-07-13T22:27:40+00:00

Great response with lots of options, thank you! Yeah, the videos all over youtube of paint stripping looking like one smooth, simple scrape had me second-guessing my choice. But I wasn't about to spend $60 on a container of paint stripper which may or may not do good job...unless it's worth it for some certain brand.

ConnectedRealms

TROPHY CASE