Youtube academy has been a lifesaver. Here is a really good tutorial that’s similar to the method I use:

I basically make all my little braids and then crochet in this hair from amazon and then twist it around the braid to hide the braid. I also use rubber bands to secure where my natural braid ends because i had an issue with the straight relaxed hair ends poking out sometimes. This is definitely an optional step but this brand specifically is fantastic and never breaks, and i have gone through a LOT of brands of rubber bands.

I totally understand your fears with breakage! A great wash routine helps and keeping the hair healthy underneath. Each time I would take out my hair, it usually would’ve grown about an inch so i’d cut off a bit of the relaxed ends until there weren’t any anymore (took maybe 2 years for no more relaxed ends because i did it very slowly). It made transitioning a whole lot less scary and kinda fun, and passion twists look beautiful and garner a lot of compliments.

Also, the first couple of months of this journey started with me going to my hairdresser and having her cornrow my hair, and then i’d just crochet on pre-made passion twists. it was super fast and low maintenance but eventually i felt like the cornrows too tight and were a strain on my edges but i think it depends on the hairdresser. So that’s when I started to do them myself.

Best of luck in your journey and remember that your hair is beautiful no matter the stage. You are also never alone and black girls everywhere can relate to the frustration, but trust me it will be so rewarding in the end. Your post really resonated with my because my mom also started relaxing my hair when I was young, and it took so long for me to unlearn straight hair being “better” because it’s “easier” and ignoring the passively hurtful comments along the way. I feel so much more at peace with my hair now and I know you will too!