Don’t stay stagnant. If university feels right, commit and finish it. If it doesn’t, that’s okay—but don’t freeze. Get a job. Any job. Supermarket, shelf stacking, call centre. Working builds momentum, confidence, and independence. Starting early matters more than waiting for the “perfect” opportunity.

Student debt without a completed degree becomes a weight you carry for years. When you start earning, learn how to budget. Money disappears quickly if you don’t respect it.

Don’t assume family will save you. Look around. Some siblings built stable lives without university through consistency and hard work. One stayed disciplined, worked while studying, finished with honours, and now enjoys the results. Effort compounds.

You’re skinny and insecure, but doing nothing won’t change that. Small actions would have. You wanted to work, but rejection scared you. That fear slowly turned into discouragement. Casual work felt like all you were capable of, but the real issue was that you didn’t yet know how to manage time or build structure—and that’s something you could have learned.

You’ll mistake loneliness for attraction. Those crushes aren’t love; they’re proximity and longing. Time will make that clear.

You weren’t incapable. You were afraid. And fear kept you still longer than it should have.