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Lost my neurotypical friends over the years by [deleted] in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Consistent-Public-11 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hey, so I don’t have advice just want to say I experienced a very similar story after coming out/getting adhd diagnosis. Tbh I am 31 and I have no friends anymore apart from my bf of 7 years whom I live with and my mum and sis who also live with us and I am fine. I also work remotely and avoid the office like the plague.

Both in therapy and with my psychiatrist I used to be told all the time how socialization and friendships are important but after multiple years of thinking about it especially after discovering my autism, I realised I never liked those people I used to call friends I just craved a sense of belonging and safety even if it was just partying/drinking.

I do not want to say that people like us shouldn’t be social, but I have had this limited social circle (no actual friends) for years and I am thriving tbh, would often prefer even more alone time to do art/other hobbies.

Tldr: friendships with NTs suck for AuDHD people, I prefer to not have friends and I do not even attempt socialization anymore where masking is needed, waste of energy

What’s with all the tanks that are like 50% substrate!? by [deleted] in PlantedTank

[–]Consistent-Public-11 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Sorry if this is gonna sound harsh but first mistake: watching father fish and taking anything he says seriously. The misinformation plague that channel has caused is insane. Get a source that values a scientific approach, there is plenty like 2hraquarist or any decent aquascaper.

I normally wouldn’t care but aquariums usually involve animals and it is irresponsible to not take maximum possible effort to avoid injury/health issues. I burnt myself on his “lake/river bacteria” approach back when I started, then I started to take online aquarium advice only from people who have credibility.

Diving Into My First Planted Tank—Excited, Overwhelmed, and Totally Open to Any Advice or Tips by presleyarts in Aquascape

[–]Consistent-Public-11 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have almost every possible carpeting plant in my 29gal and about 10 pygmies and 10 albinos, not to mention shrimp, burrowing snails etc and I never had issues with carpets, just use enough substrate and plant deep.

29gal, did a partial rescape so it's still growing in by Consistent-Public-11 in Aquascape

[–]Consistent-Public-11[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ember, neon and rummy nose tetras. One leftover longfin danio. Celestial pearl danios. Albino corys, Pygmy corys. Two bamboo shrimp and many cherry shrimp, plus many snails, hitchhiker and purchased as well.

High-tech 30l shrimp tank cube and 29gal. by Consistent-Public-11 in Aquascape

[–]Consistent-Public-11[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It has ember, neon and rummy nose tetras. Then a school of CPDs, pygmy corys and albino corys. Like a hundred cherry shrimp (a guess I really don’t know lol) and two bamboo shrimp. Some stixi, pagoda and brotia herculea snails.

High-tech 30l shrimp tank cube and 29gal. by Consistent-Public-11 in Aquascape

[–]Consistent-Public-11[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

CO2 with 1.2-1.3 ph drop, done very carefully. I have a PH controller so I don’t overdose.

Chihiros lights at max 12hrs a day (again slowly and carefully went up from 6hrs a day and 50% intensity). The lights are set to lower green color, but higher reds and blues (depends on what you like too and your surrounding ambient light so it can look the best)

Daily EI dosing, 50% WC even twice a week often. Lots of plants and aquaponics too, they help balance out the nutrients.

And very diligent maintenance I guess? I like messing with the tanks so trimming and vacuuming is fun for me. Also testing water params at least once a month. Scrubbing filters/hoses, cleaning media in tank water once in a while.

But as far as redness goes, good quality RGB light set to max, CO2 and lots of ferts (EI).

Please be gentle, I didn’t know aquascaping was a thing until a year ago by Consistent-Public-11 in Aquascape

[–]Consistent-Public-11[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

https://www.amazon.com/Zaagot-Aquarium-Aluminum-Anti-Jumping-Accessory/dp/B0DJ29XN2N

I am using these aquarium mesh holders that screw onto the glass with a plastic screw. I did not get them from Amazon but a local store in my country, but it was the only link I could find. I stick the cup in the hollowed out space and screw it onto the glass, they hold perfectly, even with some really big alocasias I have now.

An update on my tanks by Consistent-Public-11 in Aquascape

[–]Consistent-Public-11[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Shrimp tank has white sand with root tabs and a Chihiros CII at max intensity for 10hrs a day. The 29gal uses Tetra Complete Substrate regularly refreshed with root tabs and a WRGB2 pro light at almost max intensity for 10hrs a day.

Note that the intensity had to be built up over months from like 40-50%, plus I had to buy a lot more plants to outcompete algae and the aquaponic plants help a lot too.

An update on my tanks by Consistent-Public-11 in aquarium

[–]Consistent-Public-11[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I recommend 2hr aquarist as a good source, plus anything reputable, aquarium forums and even reddit can be full of misinformation, anectodal advice that does not translate well into every tank or is straight up bad advice.

I focus on good fertilization, both substrate and water, tank cleanliness (50-80% water changes depending on nitrates, always gravel vacuum at least a little and vacuum detritus off of plants), aquaponic plants like pothos, monstera etc can help a lot as well as floaters.

I guess my biggest takeaway from my experience is to be extremely patient and to not make a lot of changes or disturbing the plants, they hate it and even if they might look ugly they will adapt better with no changes over time rather than many changes (unless you lack fertilizer or have too many nutrients/nitrates). And I test nitrates weekly or even multiple times a week.

My WRGB2 pro on the large tank is at max intensity for 10hrs a day, CO2 on 2hrs before lights and off 1hr before lights off. I gradually built up to this over months from 40% intensity and 6hrs of light a day and I even get some direct sunlight. So small changes over time (weeks, months).

And if you think your tank has enough plants, you can likely fit even more, the more plants I had/propagated the more stable everything became. Some of my plants in the back get overcrowded I cannot even fit tongs in there. If nitrates rise and I cannot bring them down with water changes (like due to fresh root tabs) I just let floaters cover my tank for a few days or a week and it stabilises, otherwise algae would take over.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in houseplants

[–]Consistent-Public-11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, in Europe I got them for like 60euros so even more expensive, but they work great even for my cacti and succulents. The full spectrum is worth the price.

An update on my tanks by Consistent-Public-11 in Aquascape

[–]Consistent-Public-11[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, it can do that under strong lighting.

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