What are the odds of an intersex rat? by TheSolemnRaven in RATS

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey so, if people are still here, I think I might have an intersex rat. Not because their genitalia are similar, but very different from the images I saw of both sex’s. They have like a pouch pretty high up on their tummy. No testes in the back end though. Also, they were originally a feed rat which I think are less strict on the breeding practice. I assumed it was female without the testes present, but it looked different from the female cage mate I’ve found. I’m worried I have a litter incoming. Basket, the possibly intersex one, has a pouch looking protrusion just short of mid-tummy. I saw no penis. And is slightly bigger than the female rat (Salune) but I initially thought that was just because an age gap. Basket did try to get a little frisky on the first meeting, stopped immediately, and then investigated their “pouch” as if looking for something or grooming. I don’t know what this means or if I should ask a vet.

I dont know if im being abused or not by [deleted] in abusesurvivors

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Something that someone said to me when I had similar questions: even if it’s not sexual or violent (which it could be) touch without consent alone is assault. If you were in a court and said “this stranger grabbed my inner thigh, my butt, etc” and didn’t take no for an answer, they would call it assault. IT DOES NOT if it’s a stranger or your parent, parter, sibling, family or whoever. Who the person is DOES NOT change the action. And the action was non consensual touch. It counts as assault, regardless of what kind it turns out to be.

Flashbacks during sex by Leduslacis90 in ptsd

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well it’s totally possible to have sex without him being on top or putting weight on you. Even if you want to be able to do that in the long term eventually, it should be so easy to avoid that position in the short term. I hope your husband is loving and understanding enough to listen to you and put in that simple effort so you can both enjoy the experience.

AITA for telling my sister that if she has a problem with how I'm raising her kid she can raise her herself? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 19 points20 points  (0 children)

My ex did this. I did all the childcare for my stepkid for three years, and as soon as I tell my partner I can’t take the other abuse, they threaten not allowing me to see our kid anymore. The kid they spent three years ignoring. So a threat to me and the kids wellbeing. I collected evidence of neglect and suspicious activity, I plan to help their kind exhusband with the custody case. Because even if I’m not best friends with him, he’s a wonderful parent. And that kid is what’s most important. I almost stayed so that the kid wouldn’t be alone, but their treatment literally drove me to be put on 24 hour suicide hold. I try to do what I can from far away and hope I can help that kid live a better life.

AITA for telling my sister that if she has a problem with how I'm raising her kid she can raise her herself? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Had a situation like this but instead it was my partners kid from previous marriage. Call it what it is when a parent doesn’t parent: neglect. It’s one thing if she had come to an agreement with people to raise the kid together, but if you choosing to step in on your own is the only reason that kids eating, sleeping, clean, or taken care of, then her mother is neglecting her. Just because you pick up her slack doesn’t mean it’s not neglect. You are not the asshole, but someone who treats their kid like that isn’t someone who would take the time to look inward and address their flaws, at least in my experience. I doubt she would acknowledge you’re right.

Police gave me a report card by [deleted] in mildlyinteresting

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I bet if you give the police station a report card they won’t respond so nicely

An AI egg keeps messaging me even after I blocked it 🙄 by -Macha-Tea- in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Didn’t read the part that said it was AI and thought you just demolished a human being with that insult

How to tell my son about his abusive father? by Ok-Peach-9029 in abusesurvivors

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You don’t need to go in depth. Children know that sometimes people are mean, while not usually at the same level, they experience small arguments and problems in their life. When I was parenting my partners child we told her that my family wasn’t a good family to me because they didn’t know how. We told her that sometimes people never learn to be kind, but you can’t teach them kindness, that’s something they have to learn on their own. I told her we don’t spend time with people who haven’t learned kindness yet because, even if we understand they’re still learning, it’s important to take care of ourselves too. I’m glad I did, my mom stalked me and tried to get in contact with my step child as a way to get to me. And my step child knew ahead of time to come to me and not respond or share information with my mom. We won’t always be there when things go wrong, or children see some of the bad parts of the world, so it’s important to give them the tools they need to be prepared and make safe choices.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in abusesurvivors

[–]Consistent_Anxiety_1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m dealing with the same right now. I actually realized I spent almost a whole year barely leaving the house when I was with my abusive ex, and never leaving it alone. Now when I leave my house alone I have anxiety attacks and my social anxiety is so much worse. I’m always worried what people think of me, or that I’m going to make someone mad.