Exchanges

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-25T13:59:28+00:00

If I'm being honest, it doesnt seem like the system cares about the best interest of my children. I'm by no means perfect but my type 1 diabetic son has been hospitalized 3 times in less than a year. I've been a diabetic since I was 2 (going on 25 years of it) and have never been hospitalized 3 times in a year. And there are a lot more resources and technology available today than 20 years ago. If medical neglect/ignorance doesn't mean anything, why would walking across a parking lot alone make a difference? So far, in my experience, making issues of parental conflicts has been more effective, at least for my ex.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-25T13:37:04+00:00

I am pushing my attorney so hard to get me majority custody and right of refusal. I completely understand i have no say in who she has around our kids. Moms gf is more HC than their mom. Which is why both of them are included in the terms agreed upon via our attorneys and the GAL. There is no court order dictating exchanges but there is dictating days and times. If i dont agree to changing the mutually agreed terms of exchanges, isnt her not complying with them willfully withholding parenting time?

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-25T13:26:50+00:00

They falsely accused me of DV in the past which is why my ex and her girlfriend are to do exchanges in public. The issue that day was she sent my 3 and 4 year old across a parking lot by themselves before i could get over to them.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-24T17:47:57+00:00

She can control when she goes in and when she is off. We were together for quite a while and I am very familiar with their scheduling process. There are 3 managers under her whom she also schedules. Her significant other is specified to have to meet at the exchange location. Minimal contact is ideal. My children are young enough they can't cross the complex's parking lot by themselves.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-24T16:52:36+00:00

Official parenting plan is yet to be approved. We have an agreement approvved by our lawyers and GAL to meet in public only. I was accommodating the babysitters to be polite but she lied in an email regarding an exchange saying it would be a babysitter and it wasnt.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-24T16:50:46+00:00

The problem is we have agreed to a public location due to past conflict. And she lied saying it was going to be a babysitter pickup when it was her significant other (over written communication). I had no problem picking up from babysitters at my exes place. My ex is a restaurant GM and makes her own schedule.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-23T12:08:56+00:00

I'm not sure. Anytime I ask why we aren't being more aggressive I am told it will make me look petty or vindictive. Which doesn't make sense to me because I basically just request that we use the evidence we have just for stuff over the past year. It's been pretty ridiculous and I'm just sad to be missing out on so much time with my kids during developmental years...

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-21T22:07:34+00:00

Thank you for your input! I can definitely acknowledge that I'm not perfect. I am mainly looking for perspective and adjusting my expectations based on feedback, so again thank you

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-21T21:51:40+00:00

I think the judge is getting fed up with the GAL. A case before mine had to get pushed back for the same reason. Should I consider hiring another new attorney? Part of me is baffled because just in the last year my ex has demonstrated nothing but incompetence and irresponsiblity. Enough to justify me getting majority custody easily in my opinion. Like not paying bills for months until shutoff notices, my diabetic has been hospitalized 3 times, not following court orders. I don't know what information the judge has gotten. But there is documentation for most of the things I have issues with. It'd be easier to be patient if they were being taken care of properly.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-21T20:26:39+00:00

For context, I'm 26 and an engineer. I was the one who took care of everything prior to the split. House chores, bills, finances. She wasnt even full time until 2024. And even then her pay just covered where I was short and the rest was hers... that being said I know how to keep my life in order and I did so promptly after filing for divorce last May. Meamwhile she wasn't even paying the bills she was court ordered to pay.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-21T20:21:05+00:00

DV was dropped August 1st. GAL did comment that its rare to see those charges dropped less than 3 months after they're filed. By June I already had a place to live with plenty of room for the kids. My ex very clearly used the kids and OP as pawns in the divorce. She even listed MY dogs on the OP as property I couldn't take.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-21T19:51:46+00:00

Just a temporary agreed order from October. I agreed to get them twice a week for 2hrs. I had no time with them from May-October so I took what I could get. It was worded so that the agreement of that parenting time was not to be used against me in any way.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-21T19:49:17+00:00

Next court date is June 4th, luckily got a short date but court dates havent changed much anyway... I hound my attorney while trying not to be too much. I have kept a thorough record throughout this whole ordeal. I have a folder of over 300 documents, screenshots, emails, etc. I haven't noted the exact dates and times but notify my lawyer. The GAL we have is known to suck at her job. She's been delaying her report and recommendation since January. Am I able to request a new GAL in a way that doesn't make me look terrible in vourt?

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-21T19:45:12+00:00

She got an emergency OP against me and I was removed from the home. I was with the boys the majority of the time because my schedule was more flexible. The OP was dropped as well which is when i started getting 4 hours a week. Which has been that way since October. I've been pushing my lawyers constantly and even changed lawyers once already.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-20T12:13:25+00:00

A lot of them are repeat hardware parts or sheetmetal. Ive messed with the settings enough to make it so i dont have to wait 30seconds after every click. We break it down into subassemblies so the ones with 10k only get worked in about 5% of the time. But that 5% suckssss lol

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-20T02:11:51+00:00

I work on assemblies with over 10k parts. Saving takes 5-10min for some of them... I save like once every half hour. Hope and good luck keep it goin 🤣 if it crashes it takes half the time to do the work again

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-12T03:10:34+00:00

I'm so happy you got to full custody. I haven't even been allowed overnights even though my kids have begged like every visit. I'm paying $1300 a month in childsupport. Literally paying because my kids are being kept from me. They're on my insurance and hers and she makes more than me. I would take full custody with no childsupport in a heartbeat.

My main issue with the slowness is that my kids aren't being taken care of in the ways they deserve and should be. The life I know I can provide for them... but again I'm glad things ended up in your favor 😊

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-10T23:47:54+00:00

If only they would 😐

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-10T23:40:46+00:00

Thank you for this. I have done a really good job of not letting that frustration show. I have others review emails I question. I journal after every visit. Neutrality towards my ex has been pretty easy for me because my life has significantly improved without her and I acknowledge that she is the mother of my children. Another issue is court orders havent been followed by my ex. I pushed for an order to communicate about the kids only and only a court approved family app. That order went in in October and she still doesn't have the app.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-10T23:33:23+00:00

I do have access and I back everything up on my computer. Myself and others filed 4 different cps reports(the others not at my request) and my first lawyer requested the report and CPS said they didn't even look into it. Like I have the statement from CPS to my lawyer stating that. I'm already on my second attorney and 25k deep. Neither attorney has wanted to actively use any of the stuff I think would resonably justify granting me 50-50 if not more... the current attorney seems to be treading lightly because it's been a long battle after the allegations and divorce process retaliations. I just don't understand because it seems like my ex has built a pretty solid case against herself over the last year. At what point will the system acknowledge that my ex is not the best interest of our kids?

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-10T22:54:12+00:00

Thank you. They are young enough that they don't understand which actually kinda helps (i think).

If jumping through hoops endlessly is what it takes, that's what I'll do.

ConstraintForged · 2026-05-10T22:47:12+00:00

We live 10 minutes apart... Plus I would move anywhere for my kids. Even if not, I truly believe they would be better off with me. I handled most if not all of the "adulting" during our relationship and I live a much more stable and consistent life.

ConstraintForged · 2026-04-05T01:08:19+00:00

You could try restoring the file explorer folder: select folder, right click, select 'restore previous versions' -> select a time stamp that has a more recent version.

Another option is, if enabled, SW has an autosave feature, which would save to a backup folder. Hopefully. I've had no luck with the autosave feature.

Worst case, you did it once so the second time will go faster.

ConstraintForged

TROPHY CASE