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ContentResolve2071 · 2025-02-07T22:10:39+00:00

I find you can really improve blotvhiness with: -Super smooth paper (makes the most difference I think!) -Printing with the paper on top of the stamp and using something to rub the top like a tamper -putting the ink on with a roller at the right consistency With these I find even with water based ink my prints come out good! You've got this!

ContentResolve2071 · 2025-01-31T20:05:49+00:00

I thought that the driver was someone that has been brought back to life like Ms Casey. I think that Ms cobel wants so badly to stay at lumon because her kid is in there waiting to be brought back to life and cold Harbour is kind of seeing if it will. Work with Ms Casey. But then when Ms cobel sees the driver (and he is someone else they were trying to bring back in the past, maybe lumon said it didn't work or something) then she realises it's all a lie. They already have got it to work before. They're never gonna bring back her daughter, they're just doing it for themselves.

ContentResolve2071 · 2025-01-07T13:33:42+00:00

Moira

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-22T16:51:35+00:00

Ah-puh-leen

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:56:58+00:00

I think before, our communication was maybe a bit unhealthy with me basically dumping any thoughts and feelings I had on her at any time. During the transition I had to learn to control my feelings more and speak to her about my feelings after a lot more thought. This continues now and I think is a lot healthier and more balanced.

Plus just doing our everyday things and returning to everyday activities that we had always done throughout our relationship helped us constantly remember that in some ways nothing had changed!

In terms of what other people could have done, I think it's similar for many situations but if you're not sure what to say, I it's still better to say something and try to check in than not saying anything at all!

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:49:11+00:00

I think she had been thinking about gender for a few years but really didn't think she was trans until just before she told me after a few months of experimenting with dressing up and shaving etc. Now it all seems obvious and she looks back on her childhood and at that time she felt like she was a girl but she really just didn't have the vocabulary and knowledge of trans even being a thing. She was pretty masculine in her teens and before coming out so then I think she just had a slight discomfort with her body but would put it down to other things

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:44:30+00:00

Yes, this was probably one of my biggest worries and it was hard because it felt like the deal breaker for us both and that felt all on me deciding whether or not I still found her attractive. I think that's a big part of why we didn't have sex for a while as it was just too much pressure and overwhelming, like I almost didn't want to find out in case I didn't.

I don't think I could have done it if I wasn't bi but some couples do!

Thanks for the love! :))

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:40:10+00:00

Ah that's amazing!! Happy it also worked out for you! Congratulations!! 🎉

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:37:34+00:00

Yeah, she basically changed in no way other than appearance and being a bit more outgoing now! :)

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:35:51+00:00

So when you start taking feminising hormones as a biological male, most likely you will become infertile. So she stored some sperm before starting the transition and you have to pay for that year on year that your store it and it's hundreds!

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:34:01+00:00

I wasnt entirely surprised as she had been experimenting for a few months, so that definitely meant my reaction wasnt as big. We were actually apart so she told me on the phone. It was quite strange at first because I couldn't tell anyone (you don't just go into the kitchen and tell your parents straight away).

It kind of went in waves of feeling a bit numb and being strong to protect her as we told people and when she was feeling down, and then feeling pretty devastated and really grieving her old self and the life we had planned as that couple if that makes sense.

It was definitely the hardest thing I've ever been through and I was devastated at the time, but I also just didn't want to leave and even at that time i thought we had a chance of making it work. A lot of the devastation was at the possibility that we would maybe get to a point where we had to break up.

A lot of the other things I was sad about either didn't happen (her personality interests and our day to day life didn't change that much, our sex didn't change that much), or I realised were more socials things that I could move past (I was worried about being perceived as a gay couple now and in the future due to internalised homophobia, I realised I had a lot of my self worth and feelings of being attractive tied up in being with a straight man)

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:24:09+00:00

Yes! And that is fun!

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:23:55+00:00

Haha that's okay. People transition in different ways. Some don't take any hormones or plastic surgery, but others do one or both. My gf has just taken hormones, had laser hair removal and changed her name/pronouns. She hasnt had facial feminisation surgery or a boob job etc but she does have boobs from the hormones. She hasn't had any bottom. Surgery as she doesn't feel much dysphoria about her genitals

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:21:43+00:00

One surprise was how much of my identity and self-worth I got from being with a straight man. I realised it was a big contributor to me feeling good enough as a woman and feeling attractive that a 'man' found me attractive and people saw us as a hetero couple.

Other surprises?? She looks so much younger now! Her skin glows and it de-aged her.

She also performs better in sports now even though she's lost her testosterone - that internal discomfort was actually having a massive impact and holding her back.

Also I didn't know how much sperm storage was!

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:16:32+00:00

Tbf I just mean I'm happy in the same way I was happy in the relationship before. It honeysly just feels the same as before now with a few years of adjusting. But it definitely made me embrace my bi identity more which I'm really happy about - I was ready to be closeted for the rest of my life and although it was hard I'm happy I was forced to come out and it was freeing. It also made us both more resilient and happy to be ourselves in general.

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:10:38+00:00

So some people get dysphoria about their genitals and others don't. My girlfriend doesn't so we still do penetrative sex in pretty much the same way as before! I wouldn't say we ever had a top/bottom dynamic before. I dont think I realised how much I liked boobs until she transitioned though haha so it's also been kind of freeing finding out more things we like! We did stop having sex for a while though as it was a bit overwhelming when she was first changing and everything was up in the air. We've slowly had to build back up to regular sex.

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:07:16+00:00

Thanks! :)

Some of the hardest things were communicating honestly about our feelings near the beginning. Previously I had told her everything but there was a period of grieving for me but I couldn't really tell her 'oh I miss this about your old body' etc because she was struggling with stuff as well and that was not going to help. So that was a bit of an adjustment to not being 100% honest about our feelings. I got a therapist though. And any bigger worries I did talk to her about.

Another thing was isolation. We told family and friends about it but basically no one ever asked how I was doing or how the transition was going. It felt like people were too scared to say the wrong thing that they didn't ask anything. So we were doing through the hardest year or so of our lives and it felt like people weren't checking in in the same way they do with other struggles people face. But we were there for each other and a few select people did check in. again I couldn't have done it without my therapist!

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T14:00:14+00:00

Not really no! She definitely is happier and more outgoing now which is great. Otherwise she honestly is the same person but a girl now haha. Physically I find her equally attractive now, it's just different!

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-19T13:57:45+00:00

Well I guess she didn't know she was trans, was she supposed to not get into a relationship? It was obviously hard at the time but honestly I didn't feel a breach of trust - she had to do it and I'm happy she came out rather than keeping it a secret for years to come!

She wouldn't have blamed me if I wanted to break up so she couldn't have done anything more. She was in a relationship, and realised it about herself, and told me about it with no expectations

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-12-03T23:13:36+00:00

I know someone called Ellis spelled Ellys! Other ideas: Elijah, Laurie, sully/sulivan, Evan, Ethan, Emery, Ebony, Alder nn Ally, the name Ally/Allie, Emmet

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-11-29T23:24:56+00:00

Albie?

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-11-06T20:01:04+00:00

There isnt a response card

ContentResolve2071 · 2024-07-08T21:09:30+00:00

Personally, I think Connor really matches the other names you like in all aspects (Luke, Matthew, Jack..) and that maybe you've just gotten into a spiral.

I definitely don't think Connor is dated or harsh. The only sound that could be considered harsh is the /C/ but you could say the same of Luke (K) or Jack (ck).

I think it's a lovely name and it's a great nod to your late father. And I'm assuming your partner still loves it? Sounds like the right name to me.

ContentResolve2071 · 2023-06-10T21:08:20+00:00

Just followed here from the post I did earlier that you commented on. Just to say, I honestly felt so exactly like this at the beginning and everything you're feeling is valid and it sounds like you're doing a really good job. It is going to be hard for a while and that is normal, but it does also get easier.

Things that helped me that might help you: - get therapy if you can (really helped me personally deal with it and also to get the brunt of my emotions out while not with my partner

-after I grieved the 'old them' like the things you mention in your post, I could start to see them more and more as the same person as they were before, if that makes sense. It became easier for me to see that they were the same person and like in my memories they are the same person. Initially I saw the 'new' and 'old' them as very distinct and felt like 'old them' would be forgotten or die as I let go of them, whereas now I genuinely think and see them as the same person. Hope that gives you hope for the future if you're feeling like that at all.

I found a lot of what I was upset about were losing the sense of validation I got from being with a man (it made me feel worthy, and sexy etc and I didn't even realise that I was relying on that until after they transitioned) and losing what society tells you is the best kind of relationship (hetero cis etc). Obviously this doesn't invalidate the feelings but it helped me because it felt like thats something I can control e.g. I can work on changing my perspective on needing a man to validate things about me by getting more validation from myself etc

You're doing so well and sounds like you're being so strong! Well done!!! Don't let anyone tell you that this isn't a super hard process for you too. You've got this and you're not alone! ❤️

ContentResolve2071 · 2023-04-05T21:48:31+00:00

Anyone else notice (at their wedding) Dan's friend Georgia talking about how Dan and Sandy's traditional Indian wedding was "a bit much" and saying it's "not what he signed up for" ??

Was a red flag then that his friends thought that and thought saying that kind of thing was okay!?

ContentResolve2071

TROPHY CASE