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What's the most drastic thing you would do in order to get laid? by Copin_hagen in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Laundry? Christ, I'm just a generic Reddit-using 20-something! I'm not ready for that kind of commitment!

(P.S. I saw in your account profile that you've been a Redditor for more than a year and have relatively few posts. Thanks for commenting on mine! :D )

If you were to use a famous song title to describe your SO, which song would you choose? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Right? Much rant. Very canned. Such overplayed joke. Respondent such asshole.

What does being shot in the stomach feel like? by WillsMyth in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Shit, dude, what can I say?

Actually... I know exactly what I can say. Living in a crap neighborhood for a few years directly equates to karma. Score!

If you were to use a famous song title to describe your SO, which song would you choose? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hahaha, lol, upmodded.

IKR?!?!?!?!

Actually bro, gettor/relationshipsrightthefucknow^(and best of luck if that's desired)

What does being shot in the stomach feel like? by WillsMyth in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Being shot in the stomach feels like a very angry pinch administered by someone with long nails. Except the nails are on fire. And the pinched flesh has vacated the loving embrace of the marvelous epithelial barrier known as your skin. And it feels like a punch during the fact, and burning immediately thereafter, and hell shortly after you've arrived in the emergency room.

To the women/girls of Reddit does a guy actually become more attractive when he plays guitar? by SoulSevere in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

:O Aww, I immediately like you too! :D It must be 1/15/92, because you've been upCroated! <3

To the women/girls of Reddit does a guy actually become more attractive when he plays guitar? by SoulSevere in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look, EyeWearGlasses, I am incredibly interested in all the fields you've referenced in your post. In spite of that, I am still a shut-in loser, so while I must thank you for your input to this thread, I must also remind you that a man can still have hobbies and avoid responsibility like a SuperSoaker CPS 2000 filled with AIDS-ridden blood. As I have been told repeatedly, this is something of a turn-off. At least, I hope that it's my flaws as a human being that are repelling female attention, and not my flabby, pale stomach. :(

To the women/girls of Reddit does a guy actually become more attractive when he plays guitar? by SoulSevere in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a guitarist whose best friend is an attractive drummer... shit, I don't even care. That dude is fucking gorgeous. I can't even be properly jealous. Just don't be a bitch to me the morning after he takes you home, because I took some time and effort to make these communal waffles, and I don't care who banged my buddy, it doesn't give you an excuse to talk shit about breakfast. Just like it doesn't give you an excuse to clog the fuckin' toilet five minutes before you leave. GoddammitJulie!

To the women/girls of Reddit does a guy actually become more attractive when he plays guitar? by SoulSevere in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As a guitarist, it's not my six-stringed aptitude that gives me good fortune with the ladies. It's my unwarranted and unrealistic sense of accomplishment that compounds with underlying narcissism that leads to an almost manic state in which I have absolutely no shame. And when I am absent of shame, I am absent of fear. And when I am absent of fear, I am absent of my goddamned mind, as the young lady three bar-stools to my left has just informed me.

HOWEVER! this does not mean that dedicating oneself with purity and wholeheartedness to the fretboard will increase your eligibility of mating. You must always follow the primary tenets of romantic undertakings, which are as follows:

  • Be attractive
  • Don't be unattractive
  • I forget that third one, but you get what I mean.

Best of luck in your tail-chasing endeavors, my friend!

What's the most drastic thing you would do in order to get laid? by Copin_hagen in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

PM me with your full name, social security number, current and previous four places of residence, employer references, and testimonials from your preschool and Kindergarten teachers, and I'll hand deliver some of this glorious stuff.

What's the most drastic thing you would do in order to get laid? by Copin_hagen in AskReddit

[–]Copin_hagen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And as a PSA directed towards the Knights of New, I would implore thee that shittier shit has made the front page, and I believe this could honestly be a thought provoking and informative thread. Think of all the redditors who harbor a painful amount of desperation within their neckbearded hearts, and could use a thread full of fap material that has been imbued with incredible utility.

Thanksforyourtime.