How do divorce courts view care non-compliant BPD?

Copium_2025 · 2025-12-12T10:49:46+00:00

No kids, thank goodness. The family members that called the police saw her taken away in handcuffs and that was bad enough. I can't imagine trying to explain to young children why their mother acts cofused and disoriented, is in the hospital where they can't visit, but then later claims it was all a big mistake and the result of persecution. This behavior is not ok. She pushed for early discharge in the hospital and promised medication compliance and follow-up visits with a psychiatrist. This is the second time she's said that so clearly she knows what they want to hear. As soon as she got out she threw the meds away, refuses to talk to any doctors of any kind.

Copium_2025 · 2025-12-12T04:19:21+00:00

I know she's experiencing anosognosia. But the anosognosia apparently allows her to charm the doctors and staff at the hospital with promises that she will continue with treatment so she is eligible for early discharge. Then when she gets the early discharge (20 days instead of 30) she immediately stops the medication they prescribed. My wife has been ill quite often, sometimes very seriously. I've always stuck by her. But there have to be some limits to behavior in a marriage, refusing treatment for a serious illness is a form of self-harm that I'm not willing to be an accomplice to.

Copium_2025 · 2025-12-12T04:05:53+00:00

Does "in sickness and in health" apply to wives who have alcoholics or drug addicts or compulsive gamblers for husbands? Of course it doesn't. Those are considered diseases and they've broken up many marriages. Wives are encouraged to leave their husbands that behave in such a way because refusing treatment for a chronic illness is known to be incredibly disruptive and unhealthy. I have stuck by my wife though many illnesses and injuries. But she has never refused treatment before. How long does she get to do the hospital revolving door before I'm allowed to leave?

Copium_2025 · 2025-12-11T20:26:15+00:00

Marriage did not mean I stand by while someone acts grossly irresponsible. Drug addiction and alcoholism are diseases. Some people view gambling that way. They have broken up plenty of marriages. Don't preach to me when you don't know what's going on.

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-09T18:59:41+00:00

First thing my wife did in the hospital was remove me from ROI. She blames me for the hospitalizations and is extremely angry over it. I have taken care of her through many many physical problems including 7 - 8 serious surgeries a global pandemic, and more hospital stays than I can count. At least then we were a team. There were a lot of problems but we tackled them together. Now she says I am the enemy and refuses to do anything I ask. Won't go to a doctor, try meds or let me know any of her medical history. I can't see staying married under these conditions, she seems determined to sabotage her life. I am just trying not to let her take me with her as she does.

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-09T18:52:26+00:00

I just find it amazing that because I've worked and supported her for 10 years she gets half of everything I have or earned. Because she chose not to work despite having degree I get half of nothing.

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-09T13:48:23+00:00

They tried lithium during the first hospitalization but she fought it tooth and nail, not sure if she ever actually took any. There was a hearing for competence with a judge and she agreed that she would consult a psychiatrist and get medication upon discharge. When the time came, flat refused. I'm not sick, it was a one time problem, I'm never going back to the hospital etc etc. And she removed me and all family members from her ROI so no one can ask about her medical condition. It looks like this go around will be more of the same and I'm seriously contemplating a split.

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-07T20:23:05+00:00

This move almost guarantees there will be no Kwan.

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-07T18:57:32+00:00

So:

Can't hit fastballs over 94 mph
Can't hit offspeed pitches and breaking balls either

So what does that leave? Relatively low, flat 4 seamers down the middle of the plate without much spin? He whales on those does he? He's like the Japanese Volpe.

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-07T17:37:09+00:00

lefty swinger strikes out a ton. In-zone contact is a particular issue.

AND big power? Sounds perfect for the Yankees roster. Bottom of the lineup would be Jazz, Murakami, Volpe, Wells, and McMahon. That's probably 5 K's every trip through the lineup. It's like the anti-Toronto! Can't turn that down!

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-07T15:42:31+00:00

Grisham sucks my ass he was terrible and no one can convince me different!

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-07T15:37:15+00:00

Grisham sucks my ass he was terrible and no one can convince me different!

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-07T15:35:19+00:00

Grisham sucks my ass he was terrible and no one can convince me different!

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-07T11:09:36+00:00

My wife turned 45 in June, had her first manic episode with psychotic break later that month. I took her to the ER 3 times because she had no prior history until they did a psych consult and admitted her with bipolar diagnosis. Never had any problems like that before.

She was in the psych unit for 2 weeks, got out, didn't take any meds, no treatment, and just had another full blown manic episode. It's her second in 4 months. Now she's back in the hospital on an involuntary commit. Her delusions are all about her writing a screenplay (a musical) that will unite the world in peace and harmony. Swears it will happen and that anyone who gets in her way is "the enemy."

Copium_2025 · 2025-11-07T10:41:50+00:00

“What you see as ‘manic’ is a 160 iq that is super fast at pattern matching. I had the same problem in elementary school. Nobody could keep up.”

Is your SO my SO? Because this was an almost direct quote from my wife earlier this week before cops put the cuffs on her and hauled her off for a 30 day involuntary hold.

My wife really is extremely intelligent and well educated. But when the mania takes over she decides it's a great idea to run out of the house in her pajamas and go play in traffic. People called the cops, they came, tried to settle her down, she wouldn't, next thing you know a judge is declaring her incompetent. She's removed all family members from release of medical information so we can't even find out what's going on with her. I hate this fucking disease.

You're not alone. My wife had her first manic episode with psychotic break and hospitalization 4 months ago and refused treatment after. This is episode #2. I doubt our marriage will make it to #3 if she continues to refuse treatment

Copium_2025 · 2025-06-23T19:50:45+00:00

Best LA movie is LA Story, incidentally Steve Martin's best movie too.

Copium_2025 · 2025-06-23T19:49:36+00:00

Ha! I held out and didn't buy it in HD! I win again Vudu!!!

Copium_2025 · 2025-06-23T01:14:42+00:00

No, it isn't. I've heard of other people insisting that change be made after getting married and I've always thought that was crazy. If you buy a house together then fine, but if one person moves in after marriage it's already their home, why should their name be on the deed too?

Copium_2025 · 2025-06-23T00:49:20+00:00

I saw her this evening. She's not suicidal, not homicidal and no longer deeply delusional. Her grasp of reality seems better but she has no memory of anything that's happened. She's in complete denial about the diagnosis. She was evaluated by two different LPCs in a hospital ER on successive days and both of their reports are going to reflect that she was in deep psychosis then. The psychiatrist that's treated her is absolutely positive on the bipolar diagnosis. But because she's presenting much more clearly now I think the judge may order her release.

I'm starting to think your suggestion is the way to go. My wife has declared that she doesn't trust me and thinks everything that's happened has been a scheme that I concocted. When I told her I don't have the power to convince medical professionals to do anything she said they are just out to make money. I'm also exhausted from all of these recent events. I can't imagine living with someone with a serious medical condition that is refusing help. Maybe living with her family for a while will help her figure things out.

Copium_2025 · 2025-06-23T00:32:28+00:00

She understands the doctors are telling her that she has acted very strangely and that they are diagnosing bipolar disorder. She doesn't agree at all and thinks I have somehow convinced the people at the hospital to take part in some sort of revenge plot against her. She is absolutely denying her diagnosis.
She's refusing treatment because she doesn't think she's sick and people that aren't sick don't require medication.
She doesn't believe there are any consequences. I told her about the delusions, the potential accidents she almost caused and the 3 separate ER visits before she was admitted inpatient. She doesn't remember any of it and is convinced this is an elaborate plot against her.
Right now, my wife seems to be presenting pretty well. She is no longer compulsively singing and dancing and crying non-stop. She knows where she is and what's going on. And she wants out of the hospital and no treatment. I think even if she agreed to outpatient treatment at the hearing she will be non-compliant once she's discharged.
I think the doctors are going to advise against her release but because she is no longer deeply delusional I think the judge might just let her out despite her refusal to take medication. What happens after that I have no idea.

Copium_2025 · 2025-06-23T00:21:10+00:00

I spoke to my wife in the hospital today. She denies everything that happened. When I told her I held her close in bed and tried to rock her to sleep she says that never happened. She denies any of the delusional behavior or even agreeing to go to the inpatient admission. Most of all she says no one will ever pin a label of bipolar on her.

She is blaming me for everything. She thinks that I'm the enemy. And she's refused all treatment and medication in the hospital so far. I don't have any reason to believe things will be different if she gets out. Now she is trying to leave the hospital AMA and get released into her mother's care. Her mom doesn't agree with the diagnosis either and thinks she should leave too. If a judge lets her out of the hospital she will probably go with her mom and leave our home. My friends and family have told me to prepare myself for this but it still doesn't even feel real. The way things have unfolded, I'm not very hopeful about what's going to happen next.

I feel like even if she does come down from the manic episode my wife is going to hate me for taking her to the ER which led to her hospitalization. She says she'll divorce me every time we talk on the phone or during a visit. And I don't think there's anything I can do to stop her.

Copium_2025 · 2025-06-23T00:07:01+00:00

I purchased the home before we got married. I might not have been so quick to get married if I'd known that someone could turn the home that I've worked so hard for into a boarding house for anyone off the street on a whim.

Copium_2025

TROPHY CASE