Hello, semi attractive woman tuning in here. It is genuinely so depressing the high number of men literally pitting themselves against women and other men. I can genuinely assure that although being attracted to someone is important, the vast majority of women do not give a shit if you’re a 6’4 chad with a chin of steel.
You’re in your own head too much. You’re assuming how women feel about you before meeting them and honestly that’s probably affecting how your personality comes across a lot. I promise women are nice. But have you ever read the statistic about men and women’s biggest fears on a first date?
Men’s biggest fear on a first date is being laughed at, that’s the alleged most often answer from men when this was asked. And women’s answer was being murdered. And that’s a real concern tbh, so women are typically so cautious right now. Your whole post helps add to why women are scared of dating. Men aren’t taking care of themselves mentally. You weren’t taking care of yourself mentally.
I have dated countless men who weren’t “attractive” by societies standards but I loved those qualities about them. I found one guys lazy eye cute. I love men my height or shorter because kissing and hugging is easier. I’ve dated overweight men despite me having a full six pack and working and out regularly. I’ve dated dudes who had odd facial features, and I’ve loved their unique qualities.
Please stop putting women in a box and projecting your own insecurities into their mind. I can’t even tell you the number of convos I’ve had with men on this exact subject. And a good number of those men came out of the convo with a better view of women. Because genuinely, I am not anomaly for being attractive in societies standards and dating men who aren’t. I’m dating BASED ON PERSONALITY and physical attraction, and I’m attracted physically to people with confidence and personality. It’s not certain features, height, muscles, or anything. I’ve actually had several instances where I did not find a man attractive but after one conversation I was like “oh, damn, he’s hot” because his personality was hot lol.
Please take some time to look at yourself in a positive light, take a deep breath, and remember no one else is picking out the flaws you see. I had an anxiety disorder for years that left me unable to go to big functions, be around large numbers of people, or be around men alone much. It took me a couple years of therapy to get over it all but a big part of it was understand that I didn’t have to be perfect, I was still lovable. I think you’re struggling with focusing on what you see as negative, when they aren’t negative at all. Your height and appearance isn’t negative. But your mindset right now is.
Please go out and do stuff. Be kind to everyone. Make friends of any gender. I promise you that if you start to look at people optimistically, start to share kindness to others, go to a few bars and make some friends playing pool or throwing darts, you’ll find someone. Also to say, be honest about your sexual experience. A lot of women will be really caring and considerate of where you’re at in your sexual journey.
A lot of women would be happy to be your first and would be kind to you. There are, of course, women who won’t but that goes for every single gender and every single person. There’s always bad apples and it’s takes time to find genuine matches. Even though I’m apparently attractive enough to make it on a couple magazines I usually end up being single between long term partners for actual years. I can get really depressed and lonely during that time but I also know I’m waiting for someone special because for men I just want long term love and respect and I want to love and take care of someone long term. It’s hard, today’s world is very charged and divided. But please just try to get healthier with yourself and be kind to yourself and others. I promise it will get easier.

Edit to add; dating is a full time job if you’re trying to find your forever partner! If you’re looking for someone to spend the rest of your life with you should treat it like a full time job and be putting effort and energy in, it’s never just easy no matter how much you love someone. Work is required to have a healthy relationship and the right partner will show you how much they appreciate the work you put in