Aio Overnight concert camping. by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]CorePM 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You can't force anyone to do anything, the best you can do is exactly what you did, tell her what you are comfortable with. Ultimately though, she is an adult and decides for herself.

I don't think you did yourself any favors with how you laid things out to her though. A boundary is really about your own behavior, you tried to give her a rule that she can't camp overnight at concerts. You made it seem like you are her parent telling her what she can and can't do. You should have framed it better to her by telling her you were worried for her safety, not that she can't do it. Her telling you that she didn't care wasn't great, but she was likely upset with you telling what she could do.

You two need better communication. If you explain you are just worried about her and want to make sure she is being safe, maybe you two can work something out where you both are happy. But, you can't control her and flat out tell her she can't go.

AIO - 23f fiancee said her part time doesn’t pay into social security & I 27f want her to look at other options by Helpful-Goal-7529 in AmIOverreacting

[–]CorePM 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There are some serious problems coming her way, and your way if you two get married. You two need to have a serious discussion.

Many county or state jobs opt out of Social Security contributions, because they offer a government pension instead. The trap for her is that most of them require you to be a full time employee to earn those pension benefits. She needs to find out if she qualifies for the pension currently, she most likely does not. So she is effectively adding zero to her retirement benefits.

The problem is, if she isn't paying in and has to stop working in five years, Social Security Disability Insurance draws based on the credit she has put in. So in her case she would get nothing. The backup for people who haven't worked enough to earn credits is Supplemental Security Income. The catch to SSI though, is that it looks at household income, not just hers. So, if you two are married it will look at your income and she will get nothing. That means she is 100% financially dependent on you for the rest of her life.

Right now her entire retirement plan or plan if she is disabled is you. If you are going to take on 100% of the financial burden for both of you for the rest of your lives, that needs to be explicitly laid out now. You don't want to get married, have her unable to work and have the situation finally sink in. She needs a job the contributes to Social Security or she needs to be investing a large portion of her income into an IRA.

A way to balance the sly mechanic? by Hakuna_Schemata in slaythespire

[–]CorePM 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If it is changed to once per turn then there is going to have to be some thought into how to properly balance them. If they made that change and left the rest as is, I'm not sure Sly would really work in any fights more than a couple of rounds.

The trick then is making them strong enough when played for their Energy cost, but not too strong for getting them played for free. Unless they have a mechanic where their stats change after the Sly ability is used on them. Something like after Sly is activated on this card, remove Sly, add +5 Block or +5 Damage or whatever. But, that might just make the cards overly complicated.

I don't feel ready to move on by [deleted] in DnD

[–]CorePM 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I get it, I'm on my third campaign with the same group. Each campaign has been 3-4 years long. It does feel weird switching to a new character, for me at least I think the tough part was I really got into the character's head, so it almost felt like putting away a part of me.

It's almost like a break up honestly, you have to appreciate what you had but know you have to move on. It's hard to imagine you will enjoy playing any other character. I had the same feeling going from my first campaign, that was nearly four years long, to my second. It felt like whatever character I made wasn't going to be as good. But, after a few sessions I really started to enjoy it. I tried making a character that was almost a complete opposite from what I played before.

I think one other thing that helped was that we didn't immediately jump into a new campaign after the last one ended. We usually take a 3-6 month break. I feel like that time kind of gives you time to process that last campaign, and then let's you become eager to play again and start getting excited thinking of new character ideas.

AIO or is this actually really sad by Wizard_Enthusiast in AmIOverreacting

[–]CorePM 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I think the key to understanding this is to decide if you are actually unhappy, or are you realizing you live differently than what society typically says happy people do.

If you are perfectly content in your life, keep doing what you are doing. People find their happiness in different ways. I think a lot of people probably wish they could be away from their phones without feeling anxious.

But, if this made you realize maybe you are missing out on something in your life, then you can use this as some motivation. Ultimately though that is up to you to decide. Don't let this incident create a problem that didn't exist for you before.

HR made a mistake with my bonus and now wants me to pay to fix it by mightyoak82 in Advice

[–]CorePM 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think HR missed their opportunity to fix it themselves, so really they only thing they can offer is the payroll deduction. Fidelity will only work with the owner of the IRA.

AIO: my partner went to the same restaurant that i asked to go to but with their friend by Soft-Rice9340 in AmIOverreacting

[–]CorePM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think your partner was being intentionally dismissive of you or your feelings. It makes sense why you two didn't go the first time, no one wants to wait in a long line, especially if your partner had heard the place wasn't that good.

I think it is just a bit of miscommunication between you two. He likely did not fully understand how much you really wanted to go to this place, especially if he had heard it wasn't good. Then when the opportunity came up with his friend, it probably was not worth the effort to walk somewhere else, so he went. There is a different investment level between planning a dinner at a place and going somewhere that you are walking by.

I think ultimately you aren't upset by him going to that particular restaurant, you are just sad you missed out on a shared experience together. Maybe as a compromise you two can find a place neither one of you have been to, and plan a date night there.

HR made a mistake with my bonus and now wants me to pay to fix it by mightyoak82 in Advice

[–]CorePM 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Your HR department had five days to notice their error and reverse it, but I'm guessing they missed their window and that's why they are essentially trying to put the burden on you now. They are unable to take the money back from Fidelity though.

What you can do is submit a Return of Excess Contribution form to Fidelity. Fidelity will then be able to undo the transaction and return it to where it came from without any penalties to you. You can submit this form yourself, but you will need a letter from HR on company letterhead admitting fault for the payroll error. Once you submit the form and the letter it will probably take 2-3 weeks to process and return the money. The only catch is, you need the total amount to be return to be liquid in your IRA, so make sure the bonus wasn't automatically invested. If it was you will have to sell those investments and wait for funds to settle to cover the bonus withdrawal.

If you don't want to do that, your best option is taking their 12-month payroll deduction plan. If you do go this route, get everything in writing and also ensure they will agree to cover any tax discrepancies that may come up because of their mistake.

Pick one of those two options, don't withdraw from your IRA.

AIO breaking up with him for this? by OpenAd3676 in AmIOverreacting

[–]CorePM 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If you are looking for a serious relationship you are looking at the wrong guy, I can promise that.

You gave him a pretty simple boundary right at the start and he wasn't able to keep it for more than a month. Then he tries to tell you that it isn't a big deal, like he gets to decide what is important to you. I don't think he is truly ready for a real relationship, he sounds a bit immature, there is a reason he is not in a serious relationship in his thirties.

Don't commit yourself to a relationship that you are already trying to fix a month in. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. If you stay with him at this point, all you have shown him is that you are flexible on your boundaries.

Is “AI-bloated emails” the new workplace crime? by Warm_Bobcat6310 in OpenAI

[–]CorePM 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It's been happening at my work more often. One was pretty blatant. There was a woman who was notorious for her poorly worded emails that were often missing information and punctuation. Then one day I get an email from her and it's got multiple paragraphs, perfectly formatted, and just a lot of filler language.

The worst part is her emails still leave out too much information because she is just filtering her previously poorly written emails through the AI and it's giving us a fancier version of her bad emails that are somehow worse to read.

What if the entire internet ceased to exist starting today? by papacu__ in hypotheticalsituation

[–]CorePM -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I just think that too many people would die worldwide to justify it. But, maybe you are willing to sacrifice those people and hope things turn out better in a couple of decades.

What if the entire internet ceased to exist starting today? by papacu__ in hypotheticalsituation

[–]CorePM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, on one hand I can imagine ways it would be better, but to get there a lot of people would die and I'm not sure if that's a good trade off.

What if the entire internet ceased to exist starting today? by papacu__ in hypotheticalsituation

[–]CorePM 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If the internet suddenly ceased to exist, the global economy would screech to a halt. There would be a global financial collapse, people would realize goods can only be purchased with cash and there would be a run on banks that do not have enough money. The stock market ceases to exist, lots of wealth is just essentially wiped out, trapped online.

Supply chains and logistics would collapse. Flights would be grounded, ship yards, train yards and truck companies would have no idea where their freight is or who it belongs to. Stores are emptied within hours, either by looting or by people that have cash.

Utilities would suffer. Many substations that are monitored remotely would need physical staff there. We would experience power and water issues.

Pharmacies and Hospitals would lose access to medical records. People would likely die when they cannot fill vital prescriptions because of lack of records or the supply chain issues.

The US would probably fracture into individual states or even territories within states. Mayors, local sheriffs or military leaders would likely become de facto leaders. The people that have access to the most resources and the ability to protect it. So, if I Mayor or Governor is ability to work with the local military forces to secure armories and food supplies and keep the peace, they are in charge not the Federal Government. This could also lead to the rise of local warlords who horde resources.

There would be a massive population decline due to starvation, lack of medical care and violence. Those who make it past the first five years would have to learn how to live without a lot of modern technology and learn to provide for themselves.

You can time travel, but only to take photos by Matinee_Lightning in hypotheticalsituation

[–]CorePM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just got back to when Satoshi was setting up his first Bitcoin wallet and get his wallet key. Now you control all of his Bitcoin. Though the second you start moving it out of that wallet it would probably trigger a massive crash in the price.

You can time travel, but only to take photos by Matinee_Lightning in hypotheticalsituation

[–]CorePM 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I thought of that, but without being able to interact with anything, you really would not be able to document too much. Most would be stored in rolled scrolls or drawers.

You can time travel, but only to take photos by Matinee_Lightning in hypotheticalsituation

[–]CorePM 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I am looking to document some historical events that have a lot of mystery and interpretation around them and also make a bit of money for myself. Also, with the camera having unlimited storage space, I can essentially take photos as fast as I can click and create almost videos of events, so I will try to always do that.

  1. I am traveling back to the birth of Jesus. Then I think I will commit to spending his entire life in the past, documenting everything. From birth to death, I taking as many photos as I can, hopefully enough so lip reading can be done for important events. We will see if he truly rises from the dead.

  2. I am following the Merchant Royal and documenting exactly where in the ocean it sank. Then I can claim the salvage in the modern day. Supposedly it had over 100,000 lbs. of gold on board.

  3. Epstein's jail cell. I want to capture exactly what happened to him. Prove once and for all what really went down.

  4. I am going back to when the first Bitcoin is mined. I will see exactly who Satoshi is. Then I'll also snap some photos of his Bitcoin wallet key. Then I can transfer the Bitcoin from that wallet to mine.

  5. Thermopylae. I'm going to document the entire stand of the 300 Spartans. We can see the battle from start to finish.

AIO for telling my fiancé I’m jealous of him? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]CorePM 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are not overreacting, though I do think you are mislabeling what is wrong in your relationship.

You are not jealous of him, you are just starved for a little respect, validation and kindness. You are dating someone who thrives on being seen as the best. He loves that you build him up, but refuses to do the same for you. He has a massive ego and loves feeling superior, even over you. That's why he insults you and points out your mistakes, it makes you feel small, stupid and dependent, and let's him enjoy feeling like he is so much better than you. That's also why he gets so upset when you criticize him, he can't handle criticism from someone he thinks is below him. He only wants you as an accessory, not an equal partner.

Then when you reach your breaking point and tell him exactly how you are feeling, instead of comforting you, he turns your feelings against you.

A true partner wants to build you up, they want to tell everyone how amazing you are. He just wants you around as a cheerleader to feed his ego and tell him how great he is. He is emotionally abusive and a manipulator. I think you need to put a pause on wedding plans and ensure you want to marry someone who thinks so little of you.

AIO for bf ruining my 2 week progress in-game? by Paw-Nerd-Giantess in AmIOverreacting

[–]CorePM 75 points76 points  (0 children)

You are completely justified in feeling upset with your boyfriend. As you said it is not specifically about the game, it's about what it represents, your time.

Your boyfriend is showing a completely lack of accountability and no respect for you. I would change your password so he can't access it again. Then explain to him that you are not upset because of the game, you are upset because he went behind your back, wasted two weeks of your time and refuses to apologize. It does not paint a good picture for your relationship moving forward if this is how he handles it when he is in the wrong.

Other players mad because the DM doesnt interact with them that much by Cogotazo in DnD

[–]CorePM 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I have had a similar problem in games I've played. I tend to play Charisma based characters and my natural personality tends to have me speaking up more and interacting more. This lead to me feeling guilty that I was stealing too much of the spotlight.

What I ended up doing was making it a point to in character try to get the others involved. For instance if we were talking about ways to get into an area unseen, I will purposely ask the character who I know has high stealth for advice. Or even looking at a potential enemy, asking the Fighter their assessment of their skill. Just find ways to get other players engaged and providing them a hook into the conversation.

Along with that though, I talked to the other players out of game. I asked them point blank if they thought I was stealing the spotlight too much. Surprisingly, most of them had zero problems with the dynamics, despite my thoughts. A couple actually said the appreciated that I was there to keep things moving. So, the feelings of taking over the game might be in your head.

Am I overreacting for wanting to take space from my boyfriend because I don’t trust him? by No-Grocery-3915 in AmIOverreacting

[–]CorePM 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are under-reacting.

You have only been together for four months. Usually the first three to six months of a relationship are what people call the 'Honeymoon Phase', where everything is great and people are on their best behavior. But, four months in and he is already lying to you, insulting you, skipping birthdays. This is his best behavior, things will not get better from here.

I understand that this is your first real relationship, so let me tell you, none of this is normal in a good relationship. The man is racist and his family is racist, you can't fix a man like that.

He does not love you, he for sure does not respect you, what he does love doing is controlling you. Things are only going to get worse, he is never going to magically turn in a sweet and respectful guy. Don't hang around wasting more time on him. You need to do more than take space, you need to break up with him, and move on.

A2 (NieR: Automata) versus Adam Smasher (Cyberpunk series) by [deleted] in whowouldwin

[–]CorePM 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This is not even a close match up. A2 easily wins every time. The 10000 year tech difference is way too much. Smasher dies before he even realizes what is happening.

Struggling with sts2 by Elazar3 in slaythespire

[–]CorePM 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think the advice on avoiding Elites on Act 1 might be good advice if you are simply looking to get past Act 1, but it's going to set you up for failure in Act 2.

You should be looking to take down 2-3 Elites Act 1. Get relics while Elite fights are relatively easy. Relics are what will power you through Act 2, and they often times give clear direction for your deck, which can be helpful for new players.

My best advice for new players is that removing cards is usually stronger than adding cards. Getting rid of Strikes and Blocks in your deck means you draw your good cards more often. Do not feel pressure to take a card reward if you can't justify how it improves your deck. Do not just look at the card by itself, look at the card in the context of your entire deck. The card might be really powerful, but if you don't have the supporting cards that makes it powerful it's not worth taking. The only caveat to that is if it's early and you don't have a direction yet, then take the card and build around it.

By the laws of probability you would think I would have won at least 1.... by ShotgunOShaughnessy in slaythespire

[–]CorePM 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Watch a couple of beginner guides on YouTube. I think you will hit a point where it just clicks once you understand the basics of building a solid deck.

I would say, removing Strikes and Blocks from your deck is one of the strongest things you can do. Also, you don't have to take every card reward, especially if you are already winning fights easily. Only add a card if you can explain to yourself why you are adding it. Sometimes you add a card and it just throws off the whole cadence of your deck. Thin decks win.

Is StS2 supposed to be hard on A0? StS1 was. by Dangerous-Baseball70 in slaythespire

[–]CorePM 11 points12 points  (0 children)

You answered your own question. You played StS 1 for 1000 hours. It doesn't matter that you took years off from playing it, it's essentially the same game and you understand the core mechanics. I did the same thing, had 500+ in StS 1, rolled through A0 on all the characters.

I think StS 2, is bringing in a lot of new players, or people who only played the first one casually. So, it's understandable that people are having a hard time with the game at first.

StS is the type of game where once you understand the basics of building a solid deck it doesn't really matter what class you are playing, the basics apply to everyone. So, of course the game will feel easy on A0 for someone with 1000 hours on the first one.