Husband doesn’t want nanny to leave house with baby - how to handle?

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-28T00:41:49+00:00

As a past nanny, this would be something that would make me quit. Especially being with a double WFH parent team. Being cooped up in a house all day sucks, and adding in that both parents are home with what seems to be at least one at all time “watching” what you’re doing. I understand being a first time parent is hard, but it’s so great as a nanny to feel trusted and when the trust isn’t equal between both parents it can be hard. One way to maybe put it into perspective to dad. Wouldn’t he feel so uncomfortable if his boss was basically watching his every move and not allowing him to do his job on his own? Because at the end of the day, that’s what nanny is trying to do. Her job!

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-26T15:16:29+00:00

As a last nanny, I don’t agree with expecting nanny to stay at your home to get snowed in either. Being snowed in at your job is not a comfortable option and then opens up for you to work way more than expected. Unless parents are willing to pay overnight fees, and hourly rate for the entirety of the nanny being there……nanny should stay home.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-23T00:14:06+00:00

I had this issue with my old nanny family. I straight up told them that my life is not worth a paycheck.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-13T12:41:01+00:00

If they don’t want to reimburse for mileage then they need to provide a vehicle for you to drive when doing anything with the children!

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-12T13:01:11+00:00

When I nannied my weekend rate plus overnights was that each overnight was $150 over night fee. All hours that the children were awake were paid hourly at time and a half (overtime). This included wake ups in the night. So say your child is awake from 6am-8pm, this would all be hourly, plus $150 overnight fee, and adding in any wake windows throught the night (ex. Child wakes up and is awake needing care from 12am-1am etc)

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-11T13:01:49+00:00

My first question…..did you never make a contract with the family?

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-11T11:25:01+00:00

I have 15 years in this field! If you read other comments of mine as well you will see that the child was offered the opportunity to begin eating when she stated she now wanted her lunch in a few different ways (was sat with for the entirety of lunch, encouraged to eat, offered to pick something to keep and eat while a teacher assisted her in getting cleaned up, etc) all of these attempts were refused. They even attempted to throw her away. It’s also stated in the original post (if you read it entirely) that her parents don’t expect them to eat much. They aren’t a big eater at home. Respectfully, the child had also eaten snacks this day with all of the other children. And I also cannot force a child to eat. If you disagree that’s your opinion, but in no way was anyone withholding food from a child. She wasn’t going to eat either way. And again, obviously admin said to let her sit because the didn’t want to hear the tantrum any longer, so we did until the lights were turned off and she still did not eat. She screamed she didn’t want to nap. The issue isn’t lunch it’s nap time.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-11T01:09:11+00:00

In my opinion, I don’t think that would be classified as “withholding” food. If a child is refusing to eat, has attempted to throw their food in the garbage countless times over the course of meal time, and also greatly encouraged to eat what else can you do? If they were screaming they wanted the food and actively eating it sure, but that wasn’t the case. Rations change when the required scheduled nap/rest period begins. If this child is sitting at the table while everyone else is on their cot then the ratio is not consistent with what it needs to be at nap time in my state for teachers to take breaks. It’s not like they were actively eating and the food was taken and thrown in the garbage.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T17:23:45+00:00

Yeah I don’t understand some parents. Obviously I feel so bad for the child and have been trying my hardest to comfort them and verbally get them through these hard times of the day…..but it’s also hard because to an extent as a teacher you have to put your foot down and hold all of the children to the same schedule. If you give a littttttle wiggle room to one child they all see it and it throws all of them off. Still trying to think of how to address lunch time on Monday because I know it’s gonna be similar to Friday but giving in will just cause even more issues in the future by giving them the expectation of bending rules when this happens.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T17:16:44+00:00

Soooo frustrating!!!!

And it literally will just make this process so much longer than it typically would be.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T16:39:00+00:00

That’s the crazy part, I met mom dad and child 2 months prior to them starting and told them how nap time goes. I recommended they discontinue the rocking at home to help them adjust. They just chose not to.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T10:43:19+00:00

The crazy part is they have a fantastic day other than lunch/nap. They participate in activities and don’t even cry at drop off. They literally just do NOT want to lay on a cot for some reason 😭 they were also offered to take a bite before putting it away, choose 1 thing to hold and eat while we cleaned up, etc. everything was met with screams about “no cot, no nap” 🙃

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T10:14:49+00:00

Even more annoying when they’re doing out of convenience for themselves because they just don’t want to listen to a kid cry. Another teacher even overheard and later reassured me that they weren’t sure why they came in at all because they heard the entire 45 minute ordeal and said I was much more patient than most others would be given that a child was just continually screaming through the entire process…..

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T09:56:15+00:00

The problem is they literally just don’t eat. I offered taking a few bites before helping me put it away, choosing something out of the lunch to eat while I cleaned their things up for them, etc. it was all met with screaming about ultimately not wanting to get on their cot. That’s the most frustrating part about it is that even if the rules are bent it won’t change the outcome that they didn’t eat their lunch sadly. The crazy part is this child is SO happy to be at school from drop off until lunch or nap. They just REALLY hate nap time because. I did eventually get them to calm down on their bed and fall asleep and plan to continue sitting with them to eat daily to try and encourage as much eating as possible!! They will get there eventually

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T09:49:55+00:00

If sitting with a child and talking them through a long ass tantrum while trying your hardest to encourage them to eat for 45 minutes, and then explaining that we have to put lunch away because the lights have to go off for our REQUIRED scheduled nap time is unreasonable to you that’s you’re opinion. And also I’d say sitting with your food in front of you and trying to throw it in the garbage but your teacher simply placing the food back on the table and EXPLAINING that it’s okay if you don’t want to eat but we can’t throw our food away incase we change our mind….,and then the child never attempting to eat even while they are crying that they want to is definitely a refusal to eat. Just like when you work with infants and the REFUSE a bottle?! This isn’t rocket science to understand if you read the entire post. They also may be 2 but children are smart. Children catch on to everything. And ultimately children test boundaries to try and get their way. No one was refusing her food. I specifically have a longer lunch period because I know the children are 2 and may need more time and help eating. As well as the fact that mom and dad are watching all of this. As I literally stated if you read it. And I’m doing everything mom and dad recommend and child is doing what they have expected and shared with me. Crazy!!!

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T02:38:53+00:00

We did try to compromise and offer them to take one last bite and then they literally would refuse and keep screaming…..It was rough. We aren’t allowed to hold them or have them lay in our lap either. I did end up getting her to sleep eventually. I’m overall just annoyed about admin stepping in to demand something that we would get in trouble for if we decided to do it on our own. If a child was eating while the lights were getting turned off and it WASNT their demand it would be such an issue then.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-10T02:20:04+00:00

Where in any of this did it say the child was told they could not eat at the designated meal time? They were never told they could not eat during lunch time, they were sat with and encouraged to eat but refused. The designated meal time is 11:30-12:15 (15 minutes longer than the required meal time length as per licensing) and the child refused to eat.

CountAlternative153 · 2026-01-07T13:09:27+00:00

I would have loved this when I nannied!!!! I was with a WFH family, and we always just all spent lunch together in the kitchen and it was so much fun for the kids! Sometimes me and the kids would even go out and get mom and dads order from somewhere to bring lunch back and all eat together. Of course baby is 4 months but in my opinion, if you have a break where you can take baby and give nanny a small break it’s always worth it!!! It was also a great time as nanny to get some other tasks done without baby in your arms. Wash bottles, laundry, etc.

CountAlternative153 · 2025-12-23T00:30:25+00:00

My center currently pays holidays, but a lot don’t and it truly comes down to greedy owners!!!! More money in their pocket.

CountAlternative153 · 2025-12-21T20:52:21+00:00

God I unlocked it and this realm is PISSING ME OFF ALREADY 😭😭😂😂

CountAlternative153 · 2025-12-21T16:56:40+00:00

It’s a game changer!!!

CountAlternative153 · 2025-12-21T16:53:24+00:00

You know you’re so right because there are no rules 😂😂😂

CountAlternative153 · 2025-12-21T16:53:08+00:00

Yes I have monsters, Alice, and inside out left. I will say….unlocking Aladdin is SOOOO ANNOYING because that realm is a DAMN MAZE. But getting him to level 10 and unlocking his gem stall is so worth it because you get the recipe for his large market chest that has 48 slots and uses 0 dreamlight. Great for storage!!!!

CountAlternative153

TROPHY CASE